Golden Globes Notes

— The beginning song is so dumb that I am embarrassed for everyone involved. “I hope the cast of Lost can find their seats inside …” Stupid.

— Eric Bana is smokin’ hot.

— Queen Latifah – you’re kind of just not as fabulous as you believe you are. Sorry. You’re not.

— Sarah Jessica Parker looks beautiful, but I’m not wacky about her dark eye makeup. I think she looks better with the pale look.

— George Clooney just keeps getting better and better looking.

— I already totally forgot about Cinderella Man. I saw it … I think I even liked it, but instantly forgot it. Not a really good sign. Especially for me – a huge Russell Crowe freak.

— George Clooney won for Best Supporting Actor in Syriana. “This is early … I haven’t had a drink yet … ”

— Ohhhh, a shot of Mel Brooks laughing. He’s had a rough year … but there he is laughing. Nice.

— Adrien Brody and Natalie Portman are like automatons up there. They have no chemistry.

— Rachel Weisz – you are GORGEOUS but what the hell is going on with your hair?

— Rachel Weisz won for Best Supporting Actress for Constant Gardener. I didn’t see it – not my cup of tea – but I have always loved her acting.

— Her hair is really bad. And her dress looks like one of my anxiety attacks. Her eye makeup is way too dark. Her whole look is bad.

— She’s so damn sweet, though. I really like her.

Commercial break.

— I love Luke Wilson’s suit – it’s hysterical. It’s so corporate.

— Best supporting actor in a TV movie or miniseries – Paul Newman in Empire Falls – The gorgeous little Jessica Alba accepted the award for him.

— Teri Hatcher frightens me. What the hell happened to her? I yearn for the Lois and Clark days. What the hell is going on, Skeletor? You were a luscious woman back then. I am also deeply scared of her gold dress.

— I just love Camryn Manheim. I wish we could be friends.

— Best supporting actress in a TV movie or miniseries -Sandra Oh!! Now that I’m into Grey’s Anatomy this is very exciting. She can’t seem to find the stage. She is trapped out among the tables.

— She begins with: “I I I I I … feel like someone has set me on fire …” Oh. She’s making my favorite kind of speech. Nutty and funny. “Thank you SO MUCH to my team who has been with me through the years ….” Long pause. “I can’t remember any of your names right now …” Good for her. She seemed truly emotional. And that’s what I’m in it for, baby. The EMOTIONS.

Commercial break

— Brief shot of Shirley Maclaine, during the commercial break, sitting at her table and chowing down, talking to nobody. She cracks me up. I love her.

— I honestly don’t believe it is possible for me to love Drew Barrymore any more than I already do. Look at her glowing skin. Her dress. She’s just so HERSELF.

— Loved the shot of Spielberg, her director in ET, beaming at her as she entered.

— There’s something not there in Emmy Rossum or whatever her name is. I know she’s getting great gigs right now … but to me, she doesn’t have “it”

— Gwyneth looks sooooooo thrilled to be there. She barely had the energy to clap. She had a condescending look on her face, like she was just tolerating the whole event.

— I love Patricia Arquette. I’ve loved her for years. I kind of hope she wins for Medium – she’s such a real actress.

— Best actress in a TV Drama: Geena Davis. Never seen the show. But I think she’s a cool woman. I’m okay with the choice. Her breasts are overwhelming me with their jewelled beauty right now.

— “Well, that didn’t actually happen …” BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

— I love that Geena’s hair is kind of tousled and natural-looking. She looks beautiful, I think.

— I have no idea who these next presenters are. I don’t watch television enough. She looks a bit rough around the edges, whoever she is. Like she just took a bong hit before coming on.

— Best actor in a TV drama: Holy crap. Matthew Fox. Hot. Hot. But I’m hoping Keifer wins. Yay!! Dr. House! I’ve never seen the show but I adore Hugh Laurie. His brief part in Sense and Sensibility is genius.

— He is randomly thanking people from scraps of paper he has in his pocket. That is so funny. hahahahaha “I’d like to thank the script supervisor …”

Commercial break

— Oh, Melanie, Melanie. Just stop. Stop what you’re doing with your face. Please. Grow old. It’s okay. You know you want to. I do like her bouffant hairdo though. And I think her personality is adorable – I always have. Very sweet and vulnerable. She kind of can’t lie.

— Russell Crowe looks mad.

— Best mini series or motion picture made for television: I haven’t seen any of these choices. Empire Falls, Lackawanna Blues, Sleeper Cell, Into the West … no idea about any of them. And … Empire Falls won! I heard it was boring. Great cast, but boring. They all looked like stiffs, though. “Issue” movies. Yawn.

— Oh! There’s Steve Carell in the audience!!! Love him!

— Best actor in a TV series Comedy: Hi Jason Lee, you Scientologist! Charlie Sheen looks very weird. What’s up with his face? STEVE CARELL WON. I still won’t see it … argh … I’m conflicted – but I couldn’t adore Steve Carell more. He’s so so wonderful. A well deserved success. Well deserved.

— His speech is absolute genius. hahahahaha

Commercial break

— Tim Robbins – comb your hair. Honest to God.

— Jamie Foxx – take the sunglasses off.

— Best Actress in a TV Musical or Comedy: Oops. Jamie Foxx said one of the nominee’s name was “Laura Linley”. It’s Linney, babe. Take the sunglasses off. Maybe then you could read the card correctly.

— Bettah be Reese. Bettah be Reese.

— IT’S REESE WITHERSPOON! She’s phenomenal. She looks adorable. I love her hair, her makeup is subtle … I am so happy she won. “To my husband my children – you are my everything … Nothing is worth anything if I can’t have you in my life …”

— Best actress in a TV Comedy: 4 nominees from Desperate Housewives. Wow. I bet that set is a nightmare of ego and diva bullshit. Marcia Cross – what a beautiful lady. Teri Hatcher – I believe I covered my response to her earlier. Eva Longoria – she cheered for herself., I mean, really cheered. I don’t like her. And then Mary Louise Parker from Weeds – MARY LOUISE PARKER WON! HOLY CRAP.

— Okay, she looks very very thin, and I can’t stand her side ponytail. However, she won. So take THAT, Billy Crudup!

— Oh man. She just thanked John Spencer “an actor who made it look so easy …” – I got a lump in my throat at that one. He is already so missed.

Commercial break

— Emma Thompson: “I thought I had covered Jane Austen actually …” hahahaha She is hilarious. More Emma Thompson is my motto.

— Okay. I am totally having a PROBLEM with Eric Bana and his hotness right now. Hotness like that just ASSAULTS ME. STOP. Give me a chance to catch up! Argh. He is so hot.

— This blog has so gone down the tubes.

— Best actor in a TV miniseries – never heard of or seen any of these. I would like to see the The Girl in the Cafe, actually – it looked really good.

— Eric Bana. Good God. Help???

— Jonathan Rhys-Meyers won for the Irish one. Love the Irish accent. Help me. Can’t wait to see the new Woody Allen with him in it. I loved him in Bend it like Beckham, Velvet Goldmine … lovin’ the accent. He is kind of humble and awkward, which is very charming.

— Eric Bana. He’s still presenting. I’M HAVING A PROBLEM.

— Best Actress in a TV miniseries or movie: Okay, so we’ve got Halle Berry (I’m kinda over her), S. Epatha Merkerson – she’s fantastic – a Law & Order workhorse … Kelly Macdonald … Cynthia Nixon as Eleanor Roosevelt … I love her too. As you can tell, I am not critical. I’m not a snarker. Mira Sorvino in Human Trafficking … Nevah heard of it … S. Epatha Merkerson won. I am so damn happy for her even though I haven’t seen it. The chick has worked for YEARS. A true craftswoman. The kind of career I would love to have. Good for her.

— She is making me weep. “I am 53 years old. This is my first lead in a film.” This is why I love acting and actors so much.

— Okay, Eric Bana’s done presenting. Thank God. I needed a damn BREAK from his HOTNESS.

Commercial break

— And here comes the Master of Hotness, Colin Firth! He looks very scruffy and English.

— So so excited to see Match Point.

— Mandy Moore looks bored out of her mind.

— Virginia Madsen looks gorgeous, and Harrison Ford looks like an aging grizzly man. Harrison Ford walked on with a drink in his hand.

— Best screenplay: WHOOHOO for Larry McMurtry and Osama bin Laden for their screenplay for Brokeback. Yay – Annie Proulx got some applause. Always like that.

— Cut to Johnny Depp, who looks gorgeous, and yet insane.

— Larry McMurtry is awesome … “I’ll just thank our lawyers …” McMurtry is killing me. He’s talking about his typewriter – he’s had it for 30 years.

— Yay for them! Great adaptation of a phenomenal story.

Commercial break

— I love that people coming from the Best of Blogs awards – looking to see my literary ruminations are instead going to find me saying: “Eric Bana is so hot!”

— Best TV series, musical, or comedy: Curb Your Enthusiasm, Desperate Housewives, Entourage (blah), Everybody Hates Chris, My Name is Xenu, Weeds … Desperate Housewives won. And they’re all going up onstage. There are 50 of them making their way thru the tables.

— I don’t know … I’m getting a kind of tepid atmosphere in the room in response to this win … I don’t know … It just doesn’t have the same buzzy vibe when others win. People were kind of clapping, kind of not … Hmmm.

— Penelope Cruz. You’re gorgeous. Can’t understand a damn word you say. Please work on your English if you want me to give a crap about you and your career. HOWEVER: good for you for running away from the Couch-Jumper. Good work.

— Oh boy, here comes Matthew McConahoo. Where’s my brother?

— Best foreign language film: Paradise Now.

Commercial break

— Not wacky about Catherine Deneuve’s dress. She’s so stunning. Hate the sleeves.

— I don’t think it’s possible to be more beautiful than Rosario Dawson. Good God.

— Best soundtrack to a movie: John Williams, Geisha. What – does he have 60 awards now? Probably more. “Oh, whatever – piece of cake – toss the award in the garage with the 500 other ones …”

— Here comes Mariah! She’s got her act together again! No more crazy Mariah! She looks beautiful, albeit a little shiny.

— Best original song: I’m hoping Mel Brooks won. Just because, you know? Oh well. He didn’t win. Some song from Brokeback Mountain. OH – Bernie Taupin wrote the lyrics to the song – that’s pretty cool. Emmylou Harris sang it … no idea what the song is … At least they don’t PERFORM the songs on this awards show like they do on the Oscars. Sheesh. Oh my God – crazy musician leaning into the television screen and saying, “I’d like to dedicate this to Martin Luther King …” He is wasted!!

Commercial break

Next up? Cecil B. DeMille award is going to go to Anthony Hopkins.

— Gwyneth’s dress is ludicrous. Also, you’re not British. Knock it off with the fake accent.

— Oh this is fabulous. A tribute. Lion in Winter. I have goosebumps.

— Oh shit. Magic. That fucking terrifying puppet.

— Look at Hopkins’ face watching himself. Wow. He’s one of my favorite actors.

— He was so so exquisite in Remains of the Day. Acting don’t get any better than that. Takes my breath away.

— Everyone: You must see his new film when it comes out: “The World’s Fastest Indian” – I saw a pre-release of it, and it’s terrific. LOVE him.

— What a career he has had. Look at how different he looks from part to part. He’s truly extraordinary.

— Gwyneth – his name is ANTHONY. Not ANTONY. Knock it off with the accent, you puffed-sleeve phony.

— Oh my God. Elephant Man. Wow.

— WONDERFUL speech. What a beautiful man. Thanking the crews and gaffers and prop people and costume people … “They are anonymous people … they work harder than anyone …” What an actor.

Commercial break

— Here comes Mandy Moore. She still looks bored out of her mind. Her hair looks terrible – like she just pulled it back in a ponytail. I really like her … but her hair is awful.

— Love Clint’s tux. Real old-school.

— Best director of a motion picture: Peter Jackson looks homeless.

— WHOO HOO! ANG LEE!!!

— Ang Lee … so sweet. “I sometimes get too uptight … too critical to enjoy films …” Beautiful. He is all verklempt. “This has been an amazing year for American cinema.” I agree. Look at his face. “I want to give my first thanks to my fellow film-makers … ” Beautiful. Why is he just killing me now? His little squatty body, his round face … He’s very moved.

— Heath Ledger looks HAWT.

— Hi, John Travolta! Love you! You’re a freak and you’re in a cult, and you need to deal with it.

— Best actor in a comedy or musical: WOW. Joaquin Phoenix. Well well deserved. Good for him.

— hahahaha He made a funny comment at the beginning: “Who would have ever thought I would win in the comedy or musical category?” He looks gorgeous.

Commercial break

— Kathy’s comment: “Peter Jackson is sooooo on Atkins.” hahahahaha

Walk the Line – guys, it’s a fantastic film. See it. It’s so good.

— Renee Z, what exactly is your problem?

— Best Comedy/Musical: Walk the Line. Awesome.

— Renee looks like she literally RESENTS that she is not the center of attention.

— That guy’s speech is killing me. “I’m just so sad that June and John couldn’t be here to see this film … I know they would be so proud …” Ooh, he’s married to Jane Seymour. She is WEEPING in the audience. Standing, and WEEPING. Beautiful speech.

Commercial break

— Hey Debra Messing: YOU’RE FROM RHODE ISLAND. I know you don’t like to admit it, and you never mention us, and you never do anything for us – BUT YOU’RE FROM RHODE ISLAND, BEEYOTCH. I know your secret. You cannot hide.

— Help – what is this award? Best TV series? I think so.

Lost is the winner. Sheesh. I feel so behind. I MUST watch that show … I feel so out of it. People are literally lunatics with wild eyes when they talk about it. “Have you seen Lost??”

— 500 people are on that stage right now.

— “I’d like to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press for the open bar …” hahahahahaha

— Dennis Quaid looks mussed up. Oh my God, he just made the joke that Brokeback Mountain rhymes with “chick flick”. Racy!!! Quaid is hot, I don’t care that his hair is messy.

— Leo! The king of the world!!!

— He looks like he’s in the Addams Family, for some reason.

— Best actress in a motion picture: Felicity Huffman in Transamerica. Wow. Alex – where are you right now? How are you doing? Mixed personal response to this. Long story. “My mother thinks I’m on a TV show called The Women …”

Commercial break

— Hi, Hillary Swank. Sorry to hear about the breakup of your marriage.

— Oh man. Russell Crowe looks insane.

— This is for the Best Actor award.

— Terrence Howard is an amazing actor. He caught my fancy way back when in Holland’s Opus.

— I gotta vote for Heath, though. That performance was iconic, for me. Above and beyond.

— Philip!!!! Yay! I LOVE HIM!!!! Well deserved. Amazing actor.

— I’m inappropriately pissed off at Jamie Foxx’s sunglasses. I really need to let it go.

Commercial break

— Denzel. Please lighten up. You’re a great actor. You can chill out now, mkay? Humorlessness will only get you so far.

— Best Picture: Brokeback Mountain. yayyyyyyyyyyyyy I literally clapped at this one, by myself, in my apartment. Yay!!

— The producer is kind of overdoing it with the adjectives. “The understatedly elegant so and so … the brash and gorgeous so and so … the tender yet rough-housing so and so …” Calm down.

— But great film – I’m happy for it. Happy for all of them.

And that’s all, folks!!

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144 Responses to Golden Globes Notes

  1. Cullen says:

    Eric Bana … where the hell did he come from? I looked him up on IMDB and there’s not much there. He just EXPLODED on the scene. Damn. I know Troy is kind of a guilty pleasure, but I think both he and Pitt did great work in the movie.

    I watched Cinderella Man for the first time last night and was blown away. I know you’re not a Zellweger fan, but I’ve always liked her stuff and thought she was phenomenal in it — as was Crowe. Great movie.

    Ditto on Weisz. She is so awesome. On Brody, I wish they’d had a red-carpet interview with him. I always like hearing him talk. Really neat guy with a lot of potential, but I agree about him and Portman. Could just be them in public … I don’t know.

    Anywho, looks like it’s going to be a fun evening. I watched the arrival special, I’ll check in on you in the morning for your take on the show. It’s wrestlin’ night!

  2. Cullen says:

    What the hell is going on, Skeletor?

    BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

  3. red says:

    I remember Bana made a huge impression on me in Black Hawk Down – he maybe had 10 lines, but his PRESENCE …

  4. Golden Globes Snark!

    Again, I’ll keep updating if you keep refreshing. Who on earth thinks it’s a good idea to have a theme song specifically for this award show? Anyone? Anyone? I didn’t think so. This is SO LAME! Adrien Brody—cravat. Not a…

  5. Cullen says:

    Did Barrymore’s dress just give the show a PG-13 rating?

  6. red says:

    Why? It was actually very modest.

  7. Cullen says:

    You could see her nipples right though it. It was almost see-through.

  8. red says:

    I was looking at her face and her hair. I thought she looked beautiful. Nipples get hard when you’re excited, what are you gonna do.

  9. Cullen says:

    Nipples get hard when you’re excited, what are you gonna do.

    Heheh. Kind of hard for a guy not to notice.

    Geena Davis’ jeweled-breast beauty is quite funny also.

  10. peteb says:

    Yeah.. Go Sheila!.. thank you for live-blogging the Golden Globes.

    What to say.. hmmm.. Cinderella Man perhaps.. not seen it.. not on the immediate list.. and I am also a fan.. which is probably not a good sign..

    And I love the Mel Brooks note.. I’ve seen some interviews with him recently.. and he just keeps moving forward.. for better.. for worse. Not sure which it is yet.. hopefully it’s for better.

  11. Cullen says:

    Mad TV ruined House for me. I saw their a-bit-too-close-to-the-show parody before I saw an episode and now I can’t take it seriously.

  12. red says:

    I thought Drew looked beautiful – like a little hippie goddess.

    Yeah – I actually liked Cinderella Man when it came out – even Renee – she didn’t ruin it for me with her pouty stupid puss. I thought Crowe was great – and the story itself was very moving … It just didn’t last in my psyche.

  13. Cullen says:

    I’m not saying she didn’t look pretty. I am saying that the stage lights rendered what might have otherwise been a modest dress somewhat transparent.

  14. peteb says:

    Well.. I’m probably well behind on the House series.. but it should still have Hugh Laurie in the lead role.. ANYway it’s good.. interesting.. as is the acting. It just doesn’t really stretch the boundaries much. Maybe that isn’t a requirement but it should be a part of what’s being celebrated.

  15. red says:

    He’s such a great actor, peteb – he’s been doing solid work for years … it’s so nice to see him get the spotlight for a bit. It really is.

  16. Cullen says:

    I admit that I really wanted Jason Lee to win. I LOVE My Name is Earl. But Steve Carell was my second pick.

  17. Cullen says:

    Oh, and lastly, thanks for live-blogging this, Sheila, it’s been fun! Have a great night!

  18. red says:

    Cullen – hahahaha I’m such a loser! Enjoy the wrestling!

  19. peteb says:

    Hmm.. I may be wrong here.. but I’m getting the impression from IMDB, that Matthew Fox is from Lost.. and not from House *ahem*

    He’s actually very good in that show.. which I’ve seen some of.. it’s just not a very good show.. but that’s probably a personal opinion.. *wanders off*

  20. red says:

    No, I know. He’s on Lost. I was just commenting on all the nominees in that category. He used to be on Party of Five a gazillion years ago and I LOVED that show. He’s hot. I need to get into Lost but I fear how addicted I will become.

  21. peteb says:

    Ah.. there was a Dr from House in the mix then too..

    If it’s any help, Sheila, I’ve been able to dip into and out of Lost as the first series aired here.. although I did watch the final episode.. Not sure I’ll do the same again.

  22. Ann Marie says:

    Oh man, just got home about 30 minutes ago, and I’m so happy I wandered over here. Rick is JUST not interested in analyzing to the degree I am. And I do not watch enough tv or movies… so I just root for people who were in things I liked before OR the stuff I most wish I watched. But, I *love* Hugh Laurie mostly because of S&S, but House… love it. I like Felicity Huffman. Not so much about that dress. Did you see the girls just CHUGGING their wine at the table. Drink up, ladies.

  23. red says:

    I know! so funny! Hi Ann! Please stay here and analyze with me.

  24. JFH says:

    Penelope Cruz. You’re gorgeous. Can’t understand a damn word you say

    Said nearly the same thing to my wife… Including the part: “Thank God, you got away from Tommy Boy”

  25. Ann Marie says:

    See, when you’ve won a million times like John Williams, you can be brief.

    MARIAH?! Please stop. Why is your face so tan and so wide? Oh, she’s just wrong.

  26. red says:

    ann – hahahahaha I wrote just the same thing about John Williams – totally!!! He’s so gracious and everything, but whatever – when it’s your 100th award it just doesn’t have the same punch.

  27. Ann Marie says:

    I just caught sight of Gwyneth when they cut to commercial. I will try to withhold judgment ’til I get a better view, but I’m a little nervous about her sleeves. They looked puffy. And kind of like my 1st communion dress.

    Also, I love Scarlett Johansen, but that L’Oreal commercial… really, that’s just TOO MUCH COLOR. I would think she would *mock* that kind of over-the-top makeup? Why are Drew Barrymore & Harrison Ford hugging? Don’t you just wonder what the hell they are talking about? I mean, maybe she’s just saying, “That mechanic you referred me to is wonderful!!! Thank you!”

  28. red says:

    Yes I just saw them hugging and I had the same response … what the hell is going on there?

    “You’re famous, I’m famous, I love you!”

  29. Ann Marie says:

    Yep. First Communion meets some quasi-Emma sleeve and collar-like thing. Don’t like it. Like the bun (on her head, not in her oven).

  30. JFH says:

    Anthony Hopkins: GENIUS… and this is from a troglodyte who’s understanding of acting is equivalent of a wino’s understanding of fine wine

  31. Ann Marie says:

    Good God, they picked some excellent clips here. Loved the Amistad speech … and then right to Hannibal. Good that they had a little palate-cleansing Gwyneth live stuff in between. You’re right. Oh, please let her NOT turn into Kathleen Turner and her weird accent. LOVE THE WINK from him after that Hannibal scene.

  32. Ann Marie says:

    Sheila… who is his wife?

  33. Ann Marie says:

    Oooh. Next up: $cient0logist presenter.

  34. red says:

    I don’t know, Ann – no idea!!

    JFH – yup. He is amazing. A genius in the craft. There aren’t many who have his genius.

  35. red says:

    ann – hahahahahahhaa

    This is so fun!

  36. Ann Marie says:

    Mandy. Love the dress. The hair seems a little too casual for me. No need to do a true updo, but I’d like something a little more than “just finished my tennis match”.

    P.S. Saw Clint in High Def for the first time. He is VERY old.

  37. Rob Dorn says:

    You are so funny.
    I discovered you via Alexandra Billings.
    I LOVE that you are doing commentary as the Globes are globing.
    I’m watching them too and now reading your commentary and laughing and laughing.

  38. Ann Marie says:

    I would vote Ang Lee just because he did Sense & Sensibility. I have yet to see any of these I think. What is wrong with me? OH!!! He did win. Well, good for him! Did you ever read Emma (MORE EMMA) Thompson’s diaries of S&S? Her anecdotes are hilarious (and tragic as she is breaking up wiht Kenneth at the time).

  39. JFH says:

    Clint ain’t long for the world… he looked so weak…

  40. Emily says:

    REEESE!

    HELL YES!!!!!!!

  41. Ann Marie says:

    Ok, Sheila our shared reactions to Mandy’s hair kind of freaked me out a little.

  42. MFS says:

    Stopped by from the BoBs. (Thank you for the sidebar link, by the way.)

    I don’t follow awards shows, but I began reading this entry and had hit refresh four times before realizing, “Hey! I could just turn on the show.” So I did, but compared to your live-blog of the program, the actual show, well, sucks.

    Heh, heh, heh.

    I won’t be able to stay, but keep up the great work. Entertaining, fun, real.

    MFS

  43. red says:

    Emily – whoo-hoo! Isn’t she so terrific in that film??

  44. JFH says:

    Do ya’ll understand Travolta’s intro?

  45. Ann Marie says:

    Bronson, John Travolta? Please get the pronunciations of the men who have raised the bar correct.

    I LOVE Johnny Depp. Must root for him. Though I haven’t seen that, because Willy Wonky (original) a little precious to me.

    Oh, Joaquin. Good for him! I hear it’s an amazing performance. Joaquin. Please don’t self-destruct like your brother.

  46. red says:

    Ann – your quick-fire comments are making me laugh so hard I am crying.

  47. Ann Marie says:

    Good speech, Joaquin. Holy Christ, Reese Witherspoon is hot. Huzzah. Prepare for Sheila’s white-hot judgment of Renee. She is just SO irritating. If I recall, she has made some bad fashion choices at these kinds of events in the past.

  48. red says:

    Rob –

    hahahahaha I know! I’m such a geek!!!

  49. red says:

    Ann Marie – I saw Renee on the red carpet and she wouldn’t even smile. Yuk. She wears that pout and … it’s always the SAME. Get a new face, Renee.

  50. Ann Marie says:

    I’m laughing out loud over here too. Rick thinks I am insane (and I am. Just a little).

    This is one of those times where I really am grateful for that bitch of a typing teacher I had sophomore year of high school.

    Take the hat off, Tim.

  51. JFH says:

    Ohhh, Tim McGraw, thank God my wife’s asleep

  52. JFH says:

    Sheila’s favorite actress… 3 time award winner!!!

  53. Ann Marie says:

    Rick just said: I just can’t deal with Reese’s chin. It just… to much.

    Oh, God Renee. Your hair looks greasy and your dress straps are uneven.

    I like Keira Knightly, but they just should have stopped with P&P, because the BBC got it right in their 8 hours.

    I vote: Walk the Line. I WIN! I WIN!

  54. Emily says:

    Reese Witherspoon is the smartest, best actress working in the shallow pool of Hollywood right now and she fucking (sorry for the cusssing) DESERVED this.

  55. red says:

    ann – hahaha I love how we both have this mix of artistic commentary and clothing commentary. hahahaha

    “You have talent but your puffed sleeves are atrocious”

    hahahahahahahaha

  56. JFH says:

    OK, idiot question, which I’ve had for a long time:

    Is James Keach Stacy Keach’s brother?

  57. Ann Marie says:

    Oh, see, in my head, Jane Seymour was married to Stacy Keach. Lovely speech, weaving in his own parents. Very nice.

    Did you just see Kevin Bacon there? I think he needs a haircut. I mean, you’re not 20 anymore and trying to prove something to the little hick town you just moved to, Kevin. You’re like over 40. Clean it up.

  58. red says:

    I’m all confused now … I have no idea. I have to look it up.

  59. Ann Marie says:

    JFH: Yes, I think so. Yes. IMDB just confirmed.

    Oh, normally, I like Debra Messing, but I’m not enjoying that dress or hair that much. I mean, it’s not HORRIBLE, just not doing it for me.

  60. JFH says:

    Most. Overrated. Show. Ever…

  61. Ann Marie says:

    TV Drama. I watch none of these. What do I do with my time? Clearly, I spend too much time on sports and blogs.

    Hey, that guy in Rome is from the fabulous movie Persuasion.

  62. Ann Marie says:

    I am emotionally disconnected from this award.

    Ha ha open bar joke.

  63. red says:

    You are KILLING me.

  64. Ann Marie says:

    Wasn’t American Dreams also the name of a Dick Clark-produced TV show taking place in the 60’s?

    I enjoy Dennis Quaid, but don’t like his pronuncation of “controversial” or his chick flick joke (though I know he didn’t write it).

  65. JFH says:

    I’ve got a crush on Anne Hathaway… don’t tell my wife

  66. Ann Marie says:

    I think that one woman ought to win just for choosing a LIME dress.

    Oh, good for Felicity. I like her marriage.

  67. Ann Marie says:

    “I can tell I’m boring you.” ha ha ha

    Wow, great speech about becoming who you really are.

  68. red says:

    I loved that part, too. That’s how I feel about being an actor, too. Very nicely said.

  69. red says:

    hahahaha about the lime dress …

  70. Ann Marie says:

    Side note. I apologize that I am now commenting on the COMMERCIALS.

    Is anyone else a little disappointed that Harrison Ford is with Calista?

    And the redhead girl in that McDonald’s commercial has the SAME voice as the woman who played “Jenna’s” best friend in 13 going on 30.

    Wow, Hilary looks great. See her chin bugs me more than Reese’s.

  71. Ann Marie says:

    Oh, I was hoping either Phillip would win since I just read In Cold Blood for the first time this year, or David S-whatever, because he seems hard-working.

  72. red says:

    David Straithairn was great as well. A wonderful performance. They were all good!

  73. Ann Marie says:

    Wait, Hilary’s marriage broke up?!? Oh, that makes me said. CHAD LOWE!!!! CHAD LOWE!!!! (Do you remmber that?)

    Podium joke, good one!

  74. JFH says:

    Philip Seymour Hoffman is the William H. Macy of his/our generation… BTW why do I feel like the loser guy that’s just barely carrying on the conversation with the cool girls?

  75. red says:

    Ann – they just split up this week. Sad.

    CHAD LOWE!

  76. red says:

    JFH – hahahahahahahaha

    You’re doing just fine!!

  77. Ann Marie says:

    Well, that was not a surprise. But I’m happy for James Seamus and his bow tie. I still don’t understand why Osanna is wearing what looks like a white bodysuit with a silver skirt.

    Impish! Understated! Nice adjectives.

    Did we have a conversation about Geena Davis? I don’t like when someone looks like a flag. Those sparkles on the boobs make her look like one.

    Are Michelle Williams & Heath a couple? She is much thinner than on that show. With Katie Holmes. The Pre-OC. Dawson’s Creek. That’s it.

    Oh, now it’s done.

  78. Ann Marie says:

    Ok, this was so much fun! Thanks, Sheila, for starting this thread. I ask you all to love me through the judgment.

  79. red says:

    Yes – Michelle and Heath are a couple. They just bought an apartment in Brooklyn. Let the stalking begin!!

  80. red says:

    //I’m happy for James Seamus and his bow tie.//

    I literally cannot get past this sentence.

  81. zigtai says:

    Thanks so much Sheila for such a fun live blogging of the Globes!

  82. red says:

    Couldn’t have done it wihtout you all!

    It would have been pretty pathetic if NOBODY showed up … hahahaha It made it fun to watch it “with” people.

  83. Ann Marie says:

    Look, if you can be pissed off at an object:

    /I’m inappropriately pissed off at Jamie Foxx’s sunglasses/

    I can be joyful for an object. I mean, you are not pissed at Jamie Foxx… you’re pissed at his SUNGLASSES, Sheila. As though Jamie has no choice to wear them. I am now SNORTING.

  84. red says:

    hahahahahahahahahahaha I am guffawing …

    Does Jamie Foxx still think he’s playing Ray Charles? Like … what?

    I just … including the bow tie in your congratulations … I am howling

  85. Ann Marie says:

    I’m wiping TEARS from my face. I just had to go back and re-read it all. JFH: Sorry I missed the comment about you not keeping up. You did a good job keeping up, I think.

    You know what I want for my birthday? This blog entry with the comments thrown in.

    I’m exhausted. I almost feel like I need to take the day off tomorrow. :-)

  86. Alex Nunez says:

    Sheila, this is awesome, thanks. I just finished watching 24 on Tivo-delay, so this is key.

    I saw you write that you’ve never watched House. As soon as it comes back from the American-Idol-related hiatus it’s on, start watching. It’s a top 5 show for me, and Hugh Laurie is great in it.

    I think you’ll like it. Highly recommended.

  87. My Golden Globe Picks – TV

    Frankly, I haven’t seen any of the films that are nominated in the various categories, so I’m stickling with picks for the TV side.

    ..Update: It’s over. Sheila liveblogged it, so you can go get your Globes fix there if you missed the show. Well, a…

  88. red says:

    Thanks Alex! I will definitely check it out! Beleive it or not, I’m not a big TV series watcher – unless it’s on HBO – I miss out on a lot.

    When’s House on?

  89. Jessica says:

    I’ve been lurking for about a week now so it is time I came out and said hello.

    I second the House recommendation. It’s fluff tv for people with snarky senses of humor. Hugh Laurie is regularly hilarious even though the rest of it is often your regular old middle-of-the-road television show.

    I should have blogged the Globes as well. I go just as crazy during them. Except it’s slightly pitiful with my boyfriend sitting next to me silently, grimacing while I go on and on about how fabulous Philip Seymour Hoffman is.

    My most hilarious moment, though, was when Melanie Griffith’s daughter was introduced. She looked so slouchy and sulky and like she had no desire to be there, especially not in a dress. And when Melanie was standing next to her, you could just see darts shooting from her eyes sending messages to her daughter to smile. You could just see that manic look mothers get when they’re trying to telepathically send their child a message so they’re not humiliated. Sorry, Melanie. No smile. And no teeth. And she sulked and stomped her way through the whole night. Hilarious.

  90. Jessica says:

    Oh, and the new Dennis Quaid movie (also starring Mandy Moore, Judy Greer, and Hugh Grant) is American Dreamz. Very important to get the Z.

    It’s by the guys who did About a Boy and Good Company, and the preview made it look like it could possibly be awesome if they do it right.

  91. Wutzizname says:

    So uhhmm…you’ve sorta got a ‘love thang’ going on for Eric Bana, huh?

  92. Alex Nunez says:

    Sheila, House is normally on Tuesday nights at 9 on Fox. USA is also showing reruns of the first season (not sure of the schedule.)

    Also, Sounder showed up on my TiVo today. I’ll let you know my thoughts when I get a chance to sit and watch it. I need to finish Call Northside 777 first, which I’m enjoying very much so far. TCM and FMC are such great gifts from the Cable Gods!

  93. Emily says:

    I loved this, and if you haven’t gotten a chance to see Transamerica yet, you must! I had to miss the GGs but now I feel like I was there. Three cheers, BoBer comrade!

  94. Erik says:

    I watched the globes on my Tivo so I could start them 30 minutes late and fast forward through the commercials. I wish I had checked your blog earlier and realized you were liveblogging! That would have been have. Best moment of the night was when Sandra Oh won, she SO completely deserved that award. Have you ever seen Double Happiness? I think it might have been her first movie, I saw it ages and ages ago, before she languished on Arliss for 8 years and then had a resurgence with Sideways and Grey’s. But I remember seeing Double Happiness and thinking, ‘who is this amazing actress?’ I’m so happy for her. And I also have to comment on Drew Barrymore’s boobs in her dress, as someone above was commenting. I love Drew, I think she’s so smart, and I’m always happy to see her, but I thought her dress was very distracting, and I’m a gay man who never notices boobs, so I surprised myself even when she walked out on stage and the first thing I thought was, ‘hello boobs.’ Also, Steve Carell’s speech was great–do you not watch his show out of loyalty to the British version? I’ve actually never seen the British version (or the American version, for that matter, as I’m waiting to watch the British one before I will watch its knock-off). But I plan on renting it soon. And I agree with you–Eric Bana was hot, but I think Heath was hotter tonight. And, gosh, I think that’s probably enough of my rambling golden globes thoughts. Thanks for the liveblog, which was still an enjoyable read, even reading it after the fact.

  95. Erik says:

    “That would have been have.” Um. I think I meant to say: “That would have been fun.”

  96. Just1Beth says:

    Ok- I scrolled at the speed of light way down here so I could comment…Number one, Gwynneth is an uptight-pretend-British-accent-loser because she is friends with that other fake accent wack-job, Madonna. I HATE THOSE FAKE ACCENTS!!!! Number two, you MUST watch house. (Tuesdays at 9:00 on Fox) You MUST.

  97. “There’s something not there in Emmy Rossum”
    That’s what I thought all through Phantom of the Opera. A dreadful movie with dreadful actors and morbid singing. (And I liked the stage show.)

    “Yay!! Dr. House!”
    Hugh Laurie is awesome. Have you read P.G. Wodehouse yet? Laurie plays a brilliant Bertie to Stephen Fry’s Jeeves in BBC’s Jeeves and Wooster.

    “More Emma Thompson is my motto.”
    Hear, hear.

    “Kelly Macdonald”
    Is that the Kelly Macdonald from Trainspotting?

    “Virginia Madsen looks gorgeous”
    That’s like saying the night is dark :) I developed a crush on her as a wee lad when Dune came out. It has not abated.

  98. red says:

    Well, for those of us who have large boobs – it’s hard for them to not be distracting. Men can love them, fine, but just the FACT of them may be distracting – too bad. She has large breasts. I’ve seen a couple of other snarky comments about her dress – I just thought she looked great, because she looked natural, and like herself. Beautiful color for her as well.

  99. red says:

    Scott – yes! Trainspotting!!

  100. red says:

    Erik – I thought Sandra Oh’s speech was one of the highlights of the night – she was truly shocked and happy – I love to see that!! She’s great on that show.

  101. Cullen says:

    I was flipping over to the GG’s during WWE commercial breaks (I can’t believe how much of an addict I’m becoming — that’s a post in itself) and caught little snippets. I caught S. Epatha Merkerson’s acceptance and that was awesome. I agree with you about Penelop Cruz. I think Paz Vega, who was in Spanglish is more attractive, a better actress and speaks English better.

  102. red says:

    100 comments! hahahaha whoo-hoo!!!

    Alex – you are in for SUCH a treat with Sounder. Wonderful movie!!

  103. red says:

    Cullen – yeah, Merkerson’s speech was a true ACTOR’s speech. Really really moving. So psyched for her.

  104. Emily says:

    Peter Jackson – dude, what happened to that guy? I mean, he used to be this fat, disheveled director geek and the last interview I saw him in he almost looked – I hate to say it – but, well…hot.

    And good call on the Renee pot shots. This blog is so not going to hell. This was a really fun entry. Great job, Red. I almost feel like I need a cigarette.

  105. Cullen says:

    Woo Hoo! I had the hundreth comment?

    I swear every time I come in here and comment, I give myself new ideas for posts (many of which are, sometimes thankfully, forgotten). Now I not only need to post on my WWE addiction, but I need to do a Penelope vs. Paz post.

  106. Emily says:

    “My Name is Xenu”

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  107. Thanks so much for the running commentary – was thinking I would much rather experience the awards THIS way (and let my imagination run wild) than actually watching it. And I have NEVER thought it was good for Harrison to be running around with Flockhart. She has him by the you-know-what. I worry it will be her Skeletor Claws that I see flicking that whip in Indy 4…

    Besides, Ford has been replaced…

    If Russell looked mad, it may be that he is keeping an extra eye on who tries to mess with his wife – they are expecting their second child in July.

    I love all the comments about the hair, dress, etc….like I said – more fun to imagine what you are talking about.

    Was happy to hear Witherspoon won though…she is the rare female actress that I have liked.

    As for the Gay-Attractant Boobs – she probably then achieved what she wanted LOL LOL!!! That was funny Erik!

  108. red says:

    Emily – i know – i’m such an asshole – I just had to bust on any Scientologist when they came up!!!

  109. red says:

    Oh, and about Renee….

    You know me. I love actors. I forgive them everything. I think they’re awesome, in their excess, and their emotionality, and their honesty … Forgive them everything. I totally “get” them.

    But her? I do not forgive.

    Why do I have hatred in my heart for someone so … inconsequential? I do not know. I only know that it is so.

  110. red says:

    I think Russell Crowe is pretty embarrassed by his behavior this past year – Like – he really messed up – and I saw some of that on his scowly face.

    I am SURE I was just projecting. That’s all I do. Is project my own needs and desires onto these people.

    hahahaha

  111. Emily says:

    Of course you “get” them. You’re one of them. But I can definitely understand your resentment of Renee. She’s way over-hyped. There’s nothing extraordinary that I see in her talent. She’s not even some grand bombshell that makes people forget that she’s mediocre because she’s so great to look at. Her extreme success baffles me and really gets on my nerves to think that other talented actresses are being passed up for the glory they deserve because it’s being heaped on her thanks to well orchestrated PR. I swear that’s where her success comes from. Her people.

  112. I think he was pretty embarrassed too – he should be (but I can forgive him, because Ive blown sh*t in that way myself – it stays with you for a very long time.) Was very disappointed that he didnt stop and think of a more *ahem* meaningful way to get his point across. I know of more than one fan who “quit him” after that.

    Understand about the Zellweger (she’s from my part of the state!) – I thought she was adequate…but I think Witherspoon has more heart and spirit.

    That was fun, though. Instead of the next awards, Im coming here!

  113. Marti says:

    Whoa!

    I couldn’t agree more with you on certain points here. I too was completely and irrationally angry at Jamie FOxx to the point that I yelled at the screen… actually yelled! “Jaime! It’s nighttime! You’re inside! Knock it off already!”

    LOST is AMAZING. It is seriously a wonderful piece of work that’s just getting better and better. What I love most is that the main story line of what’s going on in the island is secondary to the character development. And the characters they’re developing are all smart, damaged, wonderfully interesting people.

    Renee Zelqeofjsdfner needs to just get out. Get. Out. I don’t want to have to look at her looking out with such miserable distain at everyone and everything. I’ve been saying this forever. That look that she thinks must be so cool and sexy maker her look like she’s 5 seconds away from pulling a wee little gun from her incredibly tight bodice and turning it on the nearest respectable actress she can find, thereby destroying the competition.

    Though I can’t say I completely agreed that making Legally BLond 2 was a good idea, she seems like one of the truly genuine good people in Hollywood today. Such a sweetheart.

    One thing I have to disagree with you on is Drew Barrymore. Jeezy chreezy why couldn’t that girl wear a bra? I mean, it’s nice that she’s got a big rack and all, but seriously? I was too distracted by the jiggle to remember any of what she was saying.

    Oh, and since when is AntHony Hopkins part of Gynnie’s generation? Girl needs to get some historical perspective on things.

  114. red says:

    Emily – exactly. Renee is an orchestrated success and that kind of bothers me.

    I think it bothers her as well. Which is why she always pouts and slinks and looks borderline retahded.

  115. red says:

    Sharon-

    I also forgive him anything, basically because I love him. He became Bud White in his real life!!!

  116. red says:

    Renee Zelqeofjsdfner

    HAHAHAHAHAHA

  117. OO you are so right – CLONE THAT MAN!!!

  118. red says:

    If my blog was ever entered into the Library of Congress, I would want to make certain that this particular comment thread was included.

    I just re-read thru it all and I am crying with laughter.

  119. red says:

    Uhm – delusions of grandeur, Sheila???

    But still. This is a CLASSIC comments thread.

  120. The Golden Globes

    My only commentary on the Golden Globe Awards: Munich didn’t win shit. GOOD. Sheila live-blogged the thing like a maniac, though. What a fun post. Thanks to Steve Ely for sending me this article by George Jonas, author of the…

  121. Cullen says:

    And we’ve covered all the pertinent topics. BTW, whoring myself a bit here, make sure to stop by my pad in a couple of hours. I’m working on that Cruz vs. Vega post right now.

  122. mitchell says:

    sheil..ive come to the party after the clean up..but if u want my obsevartions go to the comment section in Alex’s blog..i loved ur live blogging…u could make a living at that..how do we make that happen???

  123. mitchell says:

    sheil..ive come to the party after the clean up..but if u want my observations go to the comment section in Alex’s blog..i loved ur live blogging…u could make a living at that..how do we make that happen???

  124. mitchell says:

    also Constant Gardner and Lakawanna Blues are must sees…sheil..i really think u’d like them both.

  125. red says:

    mitchell – didn’t merkerson’s speech just KILL YOU? All the talk about hot flashes was hysterical – but also – how seriously she said, “I am 53 years old …” TEARS!!!

    I will definitely try to see it.

  126. The Golden Globes

    My only commentary on the Golden Globe Awards: Munich didn’t win shit. GOOD. Sheila live-blogged the thing like a maniac, though. What a fun post. Thanks to Steve Ely for sending me this article by George Jonas, author of the…

  127. Penelope vs. Paz

    Chatting over at Sheila’s about the Golden Globes this morning, I came up with a neat idea: I should do a post about Penelope Cruz and Paz Vega. If you don’t know either of these lovely ladies, take the time to click the IMDb links I provided.

  128. mitchell says:

    loved her!! I think she and Clooney, Huffman, Geena Davis, Steve Carell , Hugh Laurie, and Ang Lee were the real “winners”

  129. red says:

    I love how Geena Davis told that fake heart-warming story. She is awesome.

  130. mitchell says:

    she is the overall winner i think…she showed why she’s famous..for her “comic in bombshell’s clothing” thing she… and only she seems to hav e these days..there needs to be a lot of lightening up..its a fucking party..where are Jack and Robin Williams when u need them..ya know??? I love the whole bullshit thing! To quote Edina on AbFab…”let’s get celebritied up!”

  131. red says:

    Totally. That’s my big beef with Denzel Washington these days. Yawn. Nothin’ worse than an actor taking himself too seriously.

    Take yourself seriously DURING YOUR JOBS – but then chill OUT when you’re at a damn party.

  132. mitchell says:

    yes!! altho’ i do love the naked and blinding ambition on display, its very entertaining…Ryan Phillipe, Sandra Oh(love her..but relax),Rhys Meyers, and all of the housewives (Huffman excluded)..did u see her with Leslie Stahl on 60 minutes??? She gave that lady elaine look-alike a verbal bitch slap..it was fantastic.

  133. Lisa says:

    Can you believe I did not watch one minute of the GG? NOT ONE MINUTE.

    My pop culture cred has taken a huge-mongous hit.

    (I did look at all the pretty dresses on E! this morning, and that chick from Lost made me consider lesbianism.)

  134. mitchell says:

    me too Lisa..me too!

  135. Lisa says:

    The cred hit, or the lesbianism? :)

  136. Cullen says:

    Mmm. Evangeline Lilly and Emilie de Ravin. Drool.

  137. mitchell says:

    oh Lisa…my pop-culture cred was secured when i collected fat pics of Liz Taylor when i was a teen as my peers collected the Kiss album covers..so im set there..its the lesbianism thing…girls are pretty!!!

  138. red says:

    Genius. Genius comment.

  139. mitchell says:

    haha

  140. Wutzizname says:

    Hear Hear.

  141. Lizzie says:

    “Her breasts are overwhelming me with their jewelled beauty right now.”

    That is the most delightfully peculiar thing I’ve read all day (and I read Anton Chekhov’s “Fish Love” earlier).

    I second the recommendation that you should see “Jeeves and Wooster”. I think that Fry and Laurie couldn’t have been more perfect in the roles if PG Wodehouse had cast them himself. And their series “A Bit Of Fry and Laurie” was also wonderful, though I don’t imagine you’ll get a chance to see any repeats. (Amazon.com has it on VHS, though.)

  142. bluebottle says:

    We had Eric Bana all to ourselves for many years. He was part of an ensemble comedy skit show for several years before getting his own Letterman style show for a while. He was always a stand out stand-up comedian with a great natural repore and no bullshit approach to the audience. Then he transformed himself into “Chopper” playing Chopper Reid, a Melbourne thug who made a living by cutting the toes off drug dealers and other underworld figures……. Eric totally nailed him, as the man himself freely addmited. Sadly for us, it meant he went off to bigger and better things.
    Like many expat aussie actors, he helps out in dreadfull govt. funded bombs from time to time, giving the local industry the impression it isn’t as godawful as the cinema going public find it.

    Loved the recap, love the blog.

  143. Timmer says:

    Had I known you were going to do this, and so well, I wouldn’t have bothered to watch the show. This was actually more entertaining.

Comments are closed.