This post should be subtitled: All Over the Map. Follow me. If you dare:
There should be no need for every black person to hang his head in shame because of Jayson Blair's behavior. If you see everything through the filter of race, then you cannot see anything clearly.
I remember the pictures of black people jumping up and down for joy when OJ was declared "not guilty"... It seemed to me that the revelers were not gleeful because OJ was acquitted. Not really. They jumped up and down because they themselves had probably received unfair treatment from the LAPD (or wherever they lived) and felt vindicated. A wrong had been righted. That logic seems completely insane to me, but whatever: that was what was operating, because everything had been turned into a racial issue, as opposed to a criminal question: "did he or did he not" kill his wife?
Yes, the LAPD cops have a racist reputation. Black people can be unfairly targeted by racist ignorant cops. However: REALITY CHECK: I am guessing that none of the blacks complaining about racial profiling had ever experienced a white cop planting a bloody glove in their backyard.
Vincent Bugliosi, famous prosecutor of the Manson murders, commented on the miscarriage of justice that occurred in the OJ case (he actually wrote a book about it called, appropriately, Outrage), and wrote (and I'm paraphrasing): "I've spoken to all of my black friends and colleagues about this, and asked them what they thought. They have all spoken about being pulled over unnecessarily by the LAPD. I always reply: 'Yes. Perhaps you have been harassed and pulled over unfairly. But FRAMED? Have any of you been FRAMED by the cops?' Of course, the answer to THAT question has always been No." )
Many blacks (not all, but many) saw the OJ trial through a filter of race, their own filter of bad experiences from their lives, and felt that OJ's acquittal was their vindication for the pain and humiliation they themselves had suffered at the hands of the cops.
As in: "OJ could not be allowed to pay for that murder, because if he was found to be guilty... then our entire house of cards would come crumbling down. We cannot bear to have a member of our race pilloried, because it reflects on all of us."
The closer I look at that, the less sense it makes.
All black people are not OJ. OJ is not indicative of all black people. I do not look at OJ's behavior and have any opinion about black people as a whole.
Don't hang your head in shame because Jayson Blair is a bad egg!!!
It's a bit like moments I have had when I've caved and watched "The Bachelor". In the season with Andrew Firestone as The Bachelor, there was a scene at the end of the season where the absolute worst side of women (in general) was on display. They all looked like catty back-stabbing passive-aggressive bitches. Some of them would be bitchy when on camera privately - cutting each other down, mean mean mean, and then be simperingly sweet to each other in person.
The final scene was like an anthropological study. "Watch the female of the species. Notice how her bitchiness grows as each day goes on. Interesting, too: the oldest girl in this flock of females, Christina, who is 30, appears to be the least mature, and most bitchy of them all. Must make a note of that, and look into it further."
I am many things I am not proud of: I can be arrogant, and righteous, I can be way-moody, I can be scared of stupid things, I have a pretty hot temper, I have a tendency towards pessimism, but I am not a back-stabber. And I am not petty. I am also not passive-aggressive. If I have a problem with you, you will hear about it. And not 5 months later. I do not give someone the silent treatment. It is not in my nature.
I also have many great women friends. There are women who don't like other women, women who secretly do not want other women to do well, women who say "You look gorgeous, Susie" one moment and then hiss "Doesn't Susie look awful?" the second poor Susie leaves the room.
I watched that scene in "The Bachelor", cringing at times, taking it personally, feeling like the worst of my sex was on display. Bitchy catty women make us ALL look bad.
However: just because they're a bunch of back-stabbing straight-haired tank-top-and-tight-jeans-and-highheeled-boots-wearing bitches ... doesn't mean anything about ME, personally. They all look TERRIBLE in terms of their personalities, and also the general lack of self-awareness (well, except for Tina Fabulous who came out of the whole debacle smelling like a rose.)
I am sure many men watch episodes such as that one and have their worst thoughts about women confirmed. "Yup. Look at that. All women are back-stabbing money-hungry bitches." I've met guys like that, I've been on a couple of dates with guys like that: men who have terrible opinions of women, for whatever reason. Men who listen to every single thing you say, listening for cliches, listening for irrationality, waiting to be confirmed in his belief that women are irrational, and a little bit stupid. Mommy didn't love them enough, whatever. I have no interest in playing psychologist.
What I am trying to say is that black journalists and black professionals do not need to hang their heads in shame because Jayson Blair is BLACK. They should hang their heads in shame because he is a dirty JOURNALIST. Or: don't even hang the head in shame! Please, let's stop it with the shame-filled confessional stuff. Just 'fess up that he sucks, that he should never have been allowed to advance, and make sure that your own work is beyond reproach. Do what you can, in your small corner of the profession, to insure that it doesn't happen again. His race is inconsequential. Do not over-identify yourself with your race, or with your gender. It's a stupid thing to do. There are way too many exceptions to every single stereotype to take any of it seriously.
Men who grumble, "Women only care about money" don't know women like me. Men who grumble about women who spend hours shopping, have not met me. I race into a store, try on a pair of pants, fall in love with them, race out, in half an hour's time. The stereotype does not fit. I also am the opposite of cling-y or need-y. I'm too fierce about my own independence to ever try to put boundaries on somebody else. I don't need to be with somebody at all times. I could give a rat's ass if the man I'm interested in needs a couple nights to go out with the boys and whoop it up and revel in testosterone. I don't care if he looks at other women while he is out with his guy friends. Or actually, even if he is with me. If I ever couple up with someone, I am not suddenly NOT going to find other men attractive. I am not going to SUDDENLY not have a huge crush on Jeff Bridges. Whatever.
So yes, women can be small-minded, petty, and jealous ... but not all women are this way. So you cannot make blanket statements about them as a group.
At least if you're interested in the truth.
I was very glad that journalists went through soul-searching in the wake of the Jayson Blair debacle, and that the issue of race is being brought up, left and right, in an honest way. It's about time.
I do not make any assumptions about black people, in general, because of Jayson Blair. Jayson Blair was a smarmy conniving liar. And that's IT.
We need more common-sense applied to affirmative action.
Two possible conversations involving a hypothetical reporter:
1. Is [hypothetical reporter] good at what he does?
Yes.
Good enough to deserve promotion?
Yes.
Well, all righty- then.
2. Is [hypothetical reporter] good at what he does?
Well ... he's had some problems with accuracy ...
Really? Let me see some documentation of that ...
Here it is ...
Huh. Well, we probably shouldn't put him on the big national case, and we should keep a sharp eye on him.
The fact that the man is black doesn't matter at all. And neither should it matter to anybody. Black or white.
One other thing on stereotypes: Male-bashing in particular.
It's not just in the media. It is all around me.
10 minutes ago I received an email from a friend of mine, one of those joke emails, called "Men are like..."
Here are some of the "jokes":
Men are like ... Laxatives ....They irritate the shit out of you.
Men are like .... Blenders .... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
Men are like ... Commercials ... You can't believe a word they say.
Men are like ... Lava Lamps ..... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Who finds this funny? Who would find this funny?
"Fun to look at, BUT NOT VERY BRIGHT"...
I know men who are brilliant! I know men who are good-looking, sexy, AND brilliant! HOW DARE THEY??
I hate it when women are all lumped together under the "money-grubbing back-stabbing controlling" umbrella, and I hate it when men are lumped together under the "stupid doofus" umbrella.
The smugness of women sometimes is insufferable. I don't see men in that way. I just don't. I listen to the litany of complaints from women with husbands, how they treat him like a child, like a buffoon, an idiot, etc. It's incessant. I think: "Jesus, why did you want to hook up with him if you have such contempt for him, and for men in general?"
I can't participate in male-bashing, although I will not hesitate to call a spade a spade. If a guy treats me with contempt, or if I smell misogyny on him (yes, it has a scent) - I will not hesitate to call it by its name. But I will NOT participate in generalized male-bashing. I won't. I refuse. I know too many brilliant men. Brilliant sensitive stand-up guys. Who have their acts together.
I think of my nephew Cashel. I don't want him to grow up feeling shame-faced about his gender. I want him to be proud of being a man. I do not want him to be ashamed of who he is.
Posted by sheila