Advent.

I remember the Advent calendars I had when I was a kid. The magic of opening up every little window, one each day, leading up to Christmas. And counting the days till the “advent” of Santa (and Jesus), and making my little goof-ball presents for my parents and my siblings, and then gathering as a family to decorate the tree together. Same things every year. Lying awake at night with my sister Jean, pretending that we could hear hooves on the roof. We really felt like we could hear them. Perhaps we did.

Today I hauled ass around the city, doing last-minute things, picking up last-minute gifts, shoving my body through the throngs, racing to Penn Station to check train schedules, racing to Port Authority to check bus schedules, elbowing my way through the troops of National Guardsmen standing everywhere, because we are under a high terror alert.

I will wake up tomorrow, and lug my 50 pounds of presents to Penn Station, shove my way through the National Guardsmen again, and hopefully get a seat where I can sit and be quiet for 2 seconds.

It’s, frankly, unpleasant.

I didn’t get an Advent calendar this year and that was a mistake. There’s something about the nightly ritual of it which keeps me on track, keeps the whole season on track.

A small moment of meditation on life’s gifts. You need those small quiet moments in order to face the perfume-sprayers at Macy’s.

I’m going home to my parents house tomorrow. Bearing gifts.

My brother will be there. My sister and her boyfriend will be there. My other sister will be coming home tomorrow night. Cashel, my nephew, is already there. I can’t wait to see him and will have to hold myself back from hugging him so tightly that he perishes immediately. I talked with my mom tonight and I could hear Cashel’s little chattering voice in the background, he was blabbing to my dad as they ate hot dogs. It killed me.

I can’t wait to lie on the living room floor with Cashel, me with my coffee, both of us in our pajamas, playing with Legos, or Star Wars action figures, and talking about stuff.

I can’t wait to have nothing to do all day, except meet my friends for a beer later that night.

But Cashel!! I haven’t seen him since his birthday and that is way too long.

I hope you all have safe, happy, and FUN holidays, whatever religion you celebrate. I will probably check in here periodically while I am home … but hopefully not too much.

And maybe we’ll get snow! Now wouldn’t that be nice … a long walk on the beach in the snow.

And now I know, with the writing of this post I know, I must have an Advent calendar every year.

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3 Responses to Advent.

  1. toddk says:

    You have yourself a good one too!

  2. Bill McCabe says:

    Have a safe trip, Sheila, and Merry Christmas.

  3. Norahnick says:

    Every year when my German friend writes to me about her Advent calendar I say “Next year I’m having one!!” But then of course I forget because I didn’t grow up with that tradition so its foreign to me. Since I have my 2004 calendar in front of me, I’m jotting a note in it so that I will be sure to have one next year.

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