Walking to the bus this morning through the gleaming air. Scuffing through the fallen leaves. Wearing a sweater and a skirt ... a lovely fall morning.
Oops, there's my bus! Let me run the 5 steps to get to it!
I only got two steps before disaster struck, and I fell. Let me make it clear: I fell on NOTHING. I fell on a crack in the atmosphere. I didn't just trip. I WIPED OUT. I basically flew through the air. (I finally "flew up"!!) My bag went flying and its contents: my gym clothes, my sneakers, my script, my keys, my makeup ... spilled out into the street. But mainly - I went flying. I flew through the air towards the bus. Worse: I made a horrible yowling scream, mid-air. Then, in full view of an entire road full of traffic, other people waiting for the bus, and the people ON the bus ... I landed on the street, in a hodge podge of arms and legs ... my belongings now scattered nearly to Secaucus ...
Of course I tried to break my fall with the palms of my hands so I now have full-on stigmata.
My hosiery is now torn and bloodied, and my knees look too awful to mention.
I'm just glad I didn't land on my feckin' FACE. Good God. Just thinking about it makes me shiver.
Happy birthday, Meredith!
Posted by sheilaSheila - I can't think of a more perfect gift for Mere! How thoughtful of you!!! She will love it!
(as I do - sitting here at my desk trying NOT to picture this scene ANY MORE because I will laugh again.)
Posted by: Jayne at November 1, 2005 10:41 AMIt was the scream I made as I went flying towards the bus that truly makes me cringe now.
I can deal with the stigmata. But the memory of that scream? Horrible.
Posted by: red at November 1, 2005 10:42 AMOopsie Daisy! Sheila go boom! Hope you're all better soon, honey!
Posted by: Stevie at November 1, 2005 10:51 AMHave a nice trip! See ya next fall!
(Sorry. Couldn't resist. I've done that before, too, just tripped on air.)
Posted by: Lisa at November 1, 2005 10:56 AMLisa - hahahaha
DOWN she goes.
It was so SUDDEN. I had no recourse but to scream like a wild animal and fly through the air towards the turnpike.
Posted by: red at November 1, 2005 11:00 AMWhat a great present Sheila!
I just snorted outloud at work.
Then I read it again and snorted again.
I can actually visualize it! I just wish I could have heard the "yowling scream"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHareyouokayHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Posted by: mere at November 1, 2005 11:04 AMMere-I wonder if her flesh makes that slapping noise against the pavement like that baby at Warwick Mall????
Posted by: Just1Beth at November 1, 2005 4:43 PM"OWWWBBBIEEE!!" as my niece Piper always says.
How about some bacon strip bandages from Archie McPhee.com? (I don't know why I like them so much.)
But you can put them on your poor hose.
And your knees, too, I suppose. ;-)
Hope you're okay!
Posted by: tracey at November 1, 2005 11:14 PM