I have a simple question for you all …

… and I’ve never asked such a thing before … but based on the evidence… I was just wondering:

Does anyone know any hitmen?

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37 Responses to I have a simple question for you all …

  1. Rob says:

    My thoughts are that’s not the best question to ask after linking to that.

  2. peteb says:

    *shudder*

    It’s a bird.. it’s a plane.. Erm.. No. It’s not.

    Sheila, are you looking for contributions? Seriously. Whatever it costs.

  3. red says:

    I just … I mainly just don’t GET IT. What is that snow monster creature? Why is he flying? Why is he standing in the African savannah with a feather hanging off his hat?

    Why?

    This goes back to my general confusion about him in general – the lack of IRONY. If there was just a tiny wink of irony, I might not be so … confused!!!!

  4. Alex says:

    He can’t stop this feeling, Sheila. What’s not to get?

  5. red says:

    I wish he wouldn’t flap his arms. I really do.

  6. peteb says:

    What IS with the big eyed thing appearing every now and again?[the snow monster creature?]

    And the plastic salmon???

    Of course, it may be why he sells in Germany.. that may be it actually.. the Euro-pop, sorry, Euro-RAWK market is particularly un-ironic.

  7. red says:

    “Broadcasting for the 15th straight year from Dublin … the Eurovision Song Contest!”

  8. peteb says:

    Hahaha

    *ahem* You may scoff, Sheila.. but we’re going to win it this year.. back on the road again.

    We’ve got a pro singing this time, unlike last year.. the one and only Brian Kennedy is stepping up to the mark..

  9. Emily says:

    My god. I’m terrified to watch it with sound.

    Damn you, O’Malley. To the darkest circle of HELL. Eating is going to be a struggle for *weeks*.

  10. red says:

    Pete – this is just sheer awesomeness.

    I wonder if they broadcast the contest here? I don’t think so do they? Bummer.

    I am telling you- my memories of the Eurovision Song Contest are some of my favorites of my time in Ireland as a teenager. As cheesy as it all might have been – we just loved it!!

  11. red says:

    Emily –

    It’s horrifying. I know.

    Yet another blind Hof link.

  12. peteb says:

    If you really need to, Sheila, I think they’ll have a live video feed online.. it probably has a subscription fee.

    The problem is, well, one of the problems is, we don’t know what song it will be yet.. although Brian Kennedy has, reportedly, written and submitted one of his own.. anonymously, of course.

    *trying, but failing, to forget about those disturbing Hof images*

  13. Aside from the flying around and eating the plastic fish? Is that what he’s doing? The Hoff does some dance moves that you KNOW he thinks are killer. In reality, they’re atrocious and do nothing to dispel the stereotype that honkeys have no rhthym but he’s really busting those moves in earnest.

    Oh and I think his wife served him with divorce papers because of his lack of irony.

  14. amelie says:

    i have a friend who has promised to whack anyone i need whacked..

  15. Patrick says:

    I really, really, really wish I could view this at work. I’m bordering on desperate.

  16. Ann Marie says:

    I’m just… well, I am gobsmacked (I think that’s the right word here). Like Sheila, I want to understand why a character from the Cantina in Star Wars keeps showing up in some kind of Space Invader-like formation? Why is he an eskimo on a surfboard? Why does he hop in what is clearly *real* footage with the tribe, but then *also* simultaneously in super-imposed footage in costume? Who are the angels?

    Most gross: the look he gives when he’s dressed in his tux and sings the words, “yeah, you turn me on”. Also the fist pumping at the word “hooked”. Do you know what? I bet he sat in on the editing session for this to choose some of the particular shots where he NAILED the look he was going for.

  17. Patrick says:

    Ok. So, I went to the IT guy and begged him to please temporarily allow me to view streaming media. He agreed to allow me to view the link in his office. We watched. Silently. Beside ourselves in disbelief.

  18. tracey says:

    Because, seriously, if anyone KNOWS any hitmen, please send them to kill ME — NOW!!!

  19. tracey says:

    Oh, no, no, NO!! I just watched the WHOLE THING!

    At one point he sings over his OWN shoulder — as if one of him on the screen was just NOT ENOUGH! Like the director was actually yelling, “I NEED more Hasselhoff!”

    And he’s singing about being in love, blah, blah, but there are no women in the foreground anywhere …. just him and those little angel girls. Creepy.

    You get the definite sense HE is his one true love and he’s really quite serious about the relationship. I mean, look how retarded he’s willing to look! That is LOVE, man!

  20. Laura says:

    I really hope my unborn son didn’t hear any of that…he’s going to hate me.

  21. Cullen says:

    Wha … wa … What happened? I saw something around 6 p.m., but I’m just now aware of time again.

    Again, not exactly sure what happened, but my eyes and ears feel like they were raped.

  22. Alex Nunez says:

    It’s not so much the “come hither” tux look, or the safari getup, or the nanook of the north costume, or even the flying that gets me.

    it’s the flying….while holding onto the motorcycle handlebars.

    It’s as if everyone involved in the production was lobotomized IMMEDIATELY prior to rolling camera.

  23. Tainted Bill says:

    I don’t know any hitmen, but I’ll do it for $20.

  24. Alex Nunez says:

    Be careful, Tainted Bill.

    He has a toboggan.

  25. red says:

    bill – hahahahahhahahahahahahaha

  26. red says:

    I hate the part where he’s holding the two spinning cubes (all covered in images of HIMSELF) and then … with a cutesy little “oh well” shrug – throws them up into the air.

    That shrug really makes me angry.

  27. Patrick says:

    That son of a bitch is rich because of this shit.

  28. red fish says:

    I laughed so hard I cried at the image of Patrick and the IT guy speechless in front of the computer. hahahahaha

    BTW, did you miss tree hugging sister’s link late in your comments on your Jan 6th post? I would be amazed if you saw it and let it go. It is one of the most disturbing images I have EVER seen. (And I work in a hospital.)

    Here is the URL, but seriously, I don’t recommend going there.

    http://www.beegewelborn.com/swillstuff/davidhasselhoff.gif

  29. Patrick says:

    I’m not sure if I love you or hate you.

  30. Patrick says:

    IT guy is going to have a stroke when I show this to him, by the way.

  31. Jay says:

    Uuhhh…WTF.

  32. red fish says:

    I hope the IT guy is OK.

    Forgive my comment. It was very hypocritical. It drives me crazy people give a link and say don’t go there. I always do, and usually regret it.

  33. Serenity says:

    I’m hooked on a feeling too…uncontrollable naseau and vomiting.

  34. frank says:

    WHY THE FISH? Life is now complete!

  35. glb says:

    hmmm….. unbelievable is all i can say

  36. Frank says:

    What happen to the dancing bear? I wanted more of the dancing bear.

    The more I watch this the more life sucks!

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