The Sheila Variations

Hahaha, that's great! And quite a contrast to the last commencement speech you posted...

hahaha I know, I was thinking that.

I love it when she throws her note-cards up in the air.

//Everybody is out to get you. The tabloids, the demons, the bitch ass at the Chinese place that always messes up my order. //

I am laughing my butt off thinking about being at your commencement address and having Whitney Houston say, "I believe that children are our future ...(hums)...lead the way...show them all the beauty they possess inside...shit it's hot."

HAHAHAHAHA!

"He will deal with your shit ... literally ..."

Uhm, Whitney, do you know the term "over-share"??

I might go back and get another Degree if they guaranteed that speech as a reward.

I'll get my bride to look in to booking her for commencement next year...

As hilarious as that is, it's also a little sad for me to think back to when Whitney was young and beautiful and talented and seemingly full of life. It's hard to reconcile then and now...

I know - I watched one episode of that show and had to turn away in horror. WTF??? They both were so nasty, so badly behaved, so sweaty, so obsessed with poop - everything was about poop and farts - cackling with laughter about that stuff - I mean, what??? Whitney? Wha' happened?

wepapfosn sosn; slms's skdpm...Shit, where are my glasses? ahhhhh, ok...I have just sat at this computer for the past couple of minutes wondering if I should comment. Should I comment on my black love, the tabloids, them there demons..oh, I don't know. (Shakes his head repeatedly)

I got my God and I have my acting, so I know I am a success. Well, sorry all, I have to run (Leaning over his keyboard)... I got to get me my General Tso's at the local Jan Mee chinese resturant here in town.

Peace out.

I have tried to feel sorry for her, but "Whitney Houston, you are the limit!"

I saw a promo for that show and it was more than enough to convince me that watching would be a painful experience. I know she's responsible for her situation, but the idea of tuning in to watch it has a sort of Romans-Christians-Lions feel for me...

Whiteny's gonna make a HUGE comeback. She'll get it together and she will be back. You watch! And who do you think will be by her side? Her gays. Just like all divas. She'll be back.

I sure hope so, Patrick! That would be awesome.

I haven't been able to find any truth to this... where is East Southern University? Is this speech really verified by anyone?

Oh my God - it is totally a joke. There is no truth to it at all.

You haven't heard of McSweeney's? It's kind of a famous website, whoever you are - for comedy writings such as that one.

No, I've not heard of McSweeney's. I did however hear about this speech on the radio-the dj's were reading the speech saying it was "real." I took it as truth and investigated it, but couldn't find any info on it. My bad. To each his own; I guess some people take stock in twisted humor at someone else's expense.

It's easy to see why people think it WOULD be true, though - seeing as Whitney's become a crazy crack-ho with increasingly erratic behavior.

Sorry you don't find McSweeney's funny but you're in the minority.