Limerick OED

The OEDILF – the Omnificent English Dictionary in Limerick Form – a dictionary (in the works) where all definitions are reader-submitted limericks.

The more I browse, the funnier it gets. The more awesome every single person who submits a limerick seems. Tears are streaming down my face.

Now the limericks in the dictionary are obviously more lofty and are meant to define every word under the sun. I still need to say that perhaps my favorite limerick ever is:

There was a young woman from Dallas
Who used Dynamite for a phallus
They found her Vagina
In North Carolina
And her arse was in Buckingham Palace

But let’s move on to the Dictionary. It is so fun to just keep clicking through … I can’t stop.

Here is the limerick definition for “basophilia”.

A colorful thing’s basophilia.
It brings out minute sensibilia.
Apply basic dyes.
What a splendid surprise!
You can really see all of the cilia.

I love you.

And this one, for the word “calculus”:

The calculus, children — forsooth!
Mathematical shortcut to truth!
And yet I have heard
(From a dentist) this word
As a term for the gunk on a tooth.

And this gem, for the word “apodization”

Interferograms, in application,
Are processed with apodization;
A tapering function,
When used in conjunction,
Enhances a sharp transformation.

Don’t you love these people?

Here’s the definition for “arboriculturist”

Sir Bernard would oft plant a tree;
An arboriculturist he.
As his dish sweeps the sky,
Ancient quasars to spy,
His trees grow arboreally.

The best thing is that the Limerick Dictionary fills in the blanks for you – should you not know them – about Sir Bernard, or whatever else, so you can see how really clever and funny the people who submit limericks are.

Or “astrolabe”

To tell pretty well where you are,
Take an astrolabe-fix on a star.
As Hipparchus devised,
This brass disk was incised
Using skills that approach the bizarre.

I like the ones that purport to “define” technological terms, scientific, technology, mathematic, biological – so so funny. Some of them really border on the brilliant.

Example: The definition for “Apoapsis”:

In descriptions of orbits generic,
“Apoapsis” sounds too esoteric.
To advise, “Fly this high
Or you’ll crash, burn, and die!”
Means the same, but makes crewmen hysteric.

or this: definition for “corpora cavernosa”: Hilarious:

Your twin corpora cavernosa are fine;
If you want them enlarged, let’s entwine.
Yes, I’m being discreet,
Unlike spammers who greet
You with “Inches you’ll add — eight or nine!”

And then look at this gorgeousness – here is the definition for “algebra”:

x2 + 2y = 1
–a × 13,000,000
√c
7i – b
My goodness, ain’t algebra fun!

I LOVE THE PEOPLE WHO SUBMIT THESE.

Like I said. Hours of fun to be had.

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9 Responses to Limerick OED

  1. jean says:

    I so am using this idea in my classroom! I love these!

  2. Britt says:

    I’ve been having a field day with Greeks…

    “Agamemnon, come bathe — leave the slave,”
    Clytemnestra enticed. “Have a shave.”
    But Aegisthus her lover
    (His “brother”) broke cover,
    And a shave to the neck’s what they gave.”

  3. HowardBollixter says:

    Does this count? Can’t remember where I first heard it.

    A mathematician confided
    A mobius strip is one-sided.
    You’ll get quite a laugh
    If you cut one in half
    For it stays in one piece when divided.

    My favorites though,

    There was a young man from Purdue,
    Whose limericks ended at line two.

    And,

    There was a young man from Verdun.

  4. red says:

    Those are awesome Howard!!

  5. ricki says:

    Those are brilliant. I foresee “wasting” large quantities of time on that site.

    I wouldn’t be at all surprised – knowing college profs and researchers as I do – that a lot of the “technical” ones were written by researchers working with that very phenomenon or body part. It really is the kind of thing that people like us do to blow off steam.

    And I totally love the one about calculus.

  6. red says:

    I love the anatomical ones.

    “Bursae”:

    Our bursae are fluid-filled sacks
    Near our elbows, our knees and our backs.
    When they’re working and fit,
    We don’t feel them a bit,
    But they hurt when bursitis attacks.

  7. red says:

    “B lymphocyte”:

    Invading infections are prone
    To defeat by a champion, known
    To be primed for the fight,
    Like a classic white knight:
    It’s B lymphocyte, bred in the bone.

  8. melissa says:

    I LOVE THIS! (sorry, yelling was necessary). Thanks for the link!

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