{"id":195292,"date":"2024-11-12T07:52:48","date_gmt":"2024-11-12T12:52:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/?p=195292"},"modified":"2024-11-13T07:04:01","modified_gmt":"2024-11-13T12:04:01","slug":"goodbye-paula-and-thank-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/?p=195292","title":{"rendered":"Goodbye Paula. You will be missed."},"content":{"rendered":"

To the Supernatural<\/i> community we have created here, and I know many of you still show up on occasion, I have been informed of the very sad news that Paula – a regular commenter here – passed away this past August. Paula was also a writer of fanfic<\/a> and I have been reading comments from other fanfic writers, sharing how supportive she was of their work, reading drafts, making suggestions, fully engaged with her own process, but also with others’ process. Paula was an important part of the very specific “vibe” created on this site, through those epic<\/a> comments<\/a> threads<\/a>, the threads which gave us all so much joy. She was smart and sensitive, open to others’ opinions, and able to share her own (without “bashing” anyone who disagreed). One of the unique things that happened here was how we collectively created a space where you could share what you felt without being criticized (or doxxed, or harassed, as we have seen elsewhere in other fandom spaces: The Supernatural<\/i> fandom can be A LOT). <\/p>\n

Paula was here from the beginning. I was looking through her old comments this morning, and so many memories came back! She felt things deeply, she shared her disappointment in later seasons, but was devoted enough to continue watching and – very important – see the good. I often couldn’t, because I was so disappointed, but she still engaged with the art she loved so much. Her comments often helped me calm down. I’d be like “THIS SUCKED”, and she’d show up and leave some eloquent long comment about the value she perceived, moments she pulled out that pleased her – and she did all this without making anyone feel bad who felt differently. I often went back for a second look, based on her observations. <\/p>\n

She was a Sam Winchester Whisperer. She was hurt by what was done to the character in later seasons (I think we all sensed this, that nobody “over there” understood Sam or knew how to write him), and was eloquent in her explanations as to what was wrong, what was missing. She stuck up for Sam, she had his entire life in her head at all times – her memory!! – and so she could point out why what was being done was so egregious. I often leaned on her for those observations, since I tended towards Dean Whispering. I loved Sam, but Paula was Sam’s archivist and memoirist.<\/p>\n

We were also connected on Instagram, and I loved to see pictures of her life, her family, her husband and dear son, her dogs, the happiness she seemed to find in the small things. Fandom sometimes has a bad reputation because it can get quite toxic and be unwelcoming to anyone with divergent views. Paula always did it right. <\/p>\n

She didn’t just comment on Supernatural<\/i> posts here. She also commented on reviews of movies she had seen, and any other topic that struck her fancy. Here’s a comment she left on a review I wrote of a film called Relic<\/a><\/i>, a haunting horror film which was really about the struggles of caring for elderly relatives. It gives such a good feel for her writing, and the thinking and heart behind it:<\/p>\n

A study of identity and guilt rolled up in a burrito of horror. First, the cinematography was beautiful especially in the first half. All that space and distance on the roads, in the forest and between the three characters was lovely and then the transition to claustrophobic both physically in the house and emotionally between the women. The final image of the three women really got me as well.<\/p>\n

As a former caretaker for a relative with dementia, this really hit that experience on the head. The whiplash reactions, the stubborn independence, the paranoia and the guilt. The divide between the daughter\u2019s practical taking-charge and the granddaughter\u2019s empathy shows there is no easy answer how to approach it (in a haunted house, that\u2019s a complication, lol).<\/p>\n

The emotional journeys were nicely done in those moments where Sammy calling Kay mom and Kay inviting Gran home.<\/p>\n

And yes on the horror! \/\/go check into a motel\/\/ <<< This! Damn, ladies, get out \u2013 you have a car, use it! I constantly have these infinite house dreams (which interestingly enough in this context is a reflection of the search for self and identity) and this movie is nightmare fodder.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

As you can see, she was a perceptive critic, open to everything a work of art was doing, its framing, its visuals, its atmosphere. <\/p>\n

I no longer post about Supernatural<\/i> but the community remains. I have said it before and I will say it again: I have written about many subjects and have found many “fellow travelers” for all these subjects. I value anyone who chooses to spend their time here. But the Supernatural<\/i> crowd “hit different”. The hunger for frank and honest and friendly discussion of the show was insatiable. Paula was a huge part of helping to create the vibe we all cherished here. The rest of the world might be divided and rancorous, but at least we could come together here and talk about Henrikksen and henleys, coffee pots and Sam’s hair, the pros and cons of the bunker, and what the hell happened in Season 12. <\/p>\n

Please keep her devastated family in your thoughts. I will add any links here (tribute\/memorium pages, obituaries) if they become available. In the meantime, please consider making a donation in her name (Paula Brown Chapman) to Gilda’s Club Minnesota<\/a>. (Thank you, Jessie<\/a>, for the idea.)<\/p>\n

Paula was a valued person in our community. I was happy to get to know her. We will miss her very much!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

To the Supernatural community we have created here, and I know many of you still show up on occasion, I have been informed of the very sad news that Paula – a regular commenter here – passed away this past … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3,23],"tags":[2263],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/195292"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=195292"}],"version-history":[{"count":16,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/195292\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":195311,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/195292\/revisions\/195311"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=195292"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=195292"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=195292"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}