Movie cliche #1:<\/p>\n
A hot crowded New York sidewalk. There were actually jackhammers in the vicinity, as well as a shrieking ambulance, caught in traffic. I pushed my way through the crowd – and on the opposite sidewalk – suddenly saw him. Haven’t seen him in years. I literally stopped still, in the middle of the sidewalk, as though struck by lightning. My immediate instinct was to quickly cross the street and avoid him. I spent so little time with that person. Why such a dramatic response? Can’t explain: that’s the way it’s always been when I run into him. I stood stock-still – in the middle of the chaos – trying to decide what to do. And in that split second came<\/p>\n
Movie Cliche #2<\/p>\n
He saw me. He stopped stock-still as well. As though struck by lightning. He looked visibly excited and visibly uncomfortable. I could tell that he wanted to run away as well. But … ack … so awkward … we’ve seen each other … so now there is nothing to do but accept<\/p>\n
Movie Cliche #3<\/p>\n
a slow approach to one another, across the chaotic street, surrounded by busy harassed commuters, raging homeless people, fashionistas on their cellphones who seem unperturbed by the heatwave … Sirens blared. Jackhammers shattered the air. But if this were a movie – all the sound would have melted away. We met up on the corner. And then enacted<\/p>\n
Movie Cliche #4<\/p>\n
The awkward hug. The hug that people CRINGE when they watch it, in the movies. There was no hostility, oh no … just … thwarted feeling, embarrassment, yearning, and a sense that time was already slipping away so quickly that the encounter was almost over. He is so big. I had forgotten his bigness. Our hug was brief, and jittery with awkwardness. We barely know each other, truth be told. But on another level, we know all we need to know. Seriously. That’s what’s so weird about it. Then I opened my mouth and said<\/p>\n
Movie Cliche #5<\/p>\n
“I thought you were in Paris!”<\/p>\n
We both had sunglasses on. He seemed incapable of putting together a sentence – which I suppose I could call<\/p>\n
Movie Cliche #6.<\/p>\n
He’s not just articulate – he’s scarily articulate, and brilliant. He’s a writer. That’s what he does. But in my presence – he became a bumbling idiot. He would blurt out inappropriate things, suddenly declare himself all mine, and take him now, and then back off … I haven’t seen him since 2002. This dynamic is still going on<\/em>. He said something like, “Yeah … I’m back now … just in New York for a couple of days …” Then came<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #7<\/p>\n Awkward meaningless chit-chat, shimmering with sexual tension. It was ridiculous. I knew I was behaving like a cliche but I couldn’t seem to stop it. We said stuff to each other like,<\/p>\n “So … how are you?” I said “How are you?” probably 3 times. He was unbelievably vague in his responses. I tried to get us to be specific. I asked about his book. He gave me a weird look, like: “How do you know about my book?” Then I said<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #8<\/p>\n “I remember everything.”<\/p>\n Which suddenly catapulted us into a new landscape. We’re always on the edge of that landscape. Honesty? Perhaps. We’ve never said what needed to be said – mainly because – the timing was flat out NOT RIGHT. And that’s final. So you have to watch what you say. But it’s true. I remember everything. I didn’t say it in a threatening stalker way. It’s just the truth, dammit, and he knows it. I remember everything. He had told me all about his book a couple years ago and he let me read a couple chapters. How could he not remember? When I said “I remember everything” then came<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #8<\/p>\n The long potent pause. It was somehow delicious. I suddenly became preternaturally calm and unruffled, and I watched him deteriorate into awkwardness. This happened the last time I saw him, when it was even MORE inappropriate. I waited it out. I didn’t say anything. He looked in agony, truth be told – and I guess I could have put him out of his misery – but it just didn’t seem right. We’re separate. I know we’re doppelgangers and all that … but he’s got his journey I’ve got mine. Then I decided after what felt like 20 minutes of silence (again: I was unaware of the jackhammers or the sirens during this whole thing) to help him out, so I said<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #9<\/p>\n “I wish you nothing but success with it. Keep working. I loved what I read. You’re wonderful.” I then watched<\/p>\n Movie Cliches #10, 11 and 12<\/p>\n wash over his face. He wanted to kiss me. But he didn’t. He said, “Sheila. Sheila.” That was all he said. I said, “I know. I know. It’s okay.” He shook his head, wordlessly. I shook my head, wordlessly. We stood there. Wordless. He shook his head again. I nodded in response. This was all like a conversation. Everything was completely clear to me. I knew what we were saying.<\/p>\n I felt like we could have just kept going in that manner, shaking head, nodding head, not saying anything … so I initiated<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #13<\/p>\n I reached out and put my arms around him and hugged him. “It was so nice to see you,” I said.<\/p>\n Meanwhile, he was experiencing<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #14<\/p>\n He hugged me as though I were a liferaft. I was so sweaty and sticky that I was almost embarrassed he would be like: Ew. You’re a sweaty mess. But he was clutching on me. This has happened before with him. I don’t know what’s going on, but I know that it’s his journey not mine. So then came<\/p>\n Movie Cliche #15<\/p>\n I extricated myself and said to him, kindly, and with WARMTH – I could feel myself emanating warmth: “You take care of yourself. SO good to see you.” He nodded, inarticulate again. I backed away – wishing that I was a fashionista, wishing that I could go through a heatwave looking cool and glowing and unperturbed – instead of being a sweaty sticky-haired beast of the pasture. But he was looking at me as THOUGH I was a fashionista- which was distinctly strange.<\/p>\n Then came our final<\/p>\n Movie Cliche<\/p>\n He lifted his hand at me, with a grin. Sort of a sad weird grin. I lifted my hand back, and mouthed, “Bye” – then – had to do it, had to do it …<\/p>\n I turned my back on him and I walked away.<\/p>\n And suddenly I could hear the sirens again. And the jackhammers. And the traffic. And the ragings of the homeless people. Back to life. Back to reality.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Movie cliche #1: A hot crowded New York sidewalk. There were actually jackhammers in the vicinity, as well as a shrieking ambulance, caught in traffic. I pushed my way through the crowd – and on the opposite sidewalk – suddenly … Continue reading