{"id":6853,"date":"2007-08-02T06:50:54","date_gmt":"2007-08-02T10:50:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/?p=6853"},"modified":"2013-02-01T13:20:06","modified_gmt":"2013-02-01T18:20:06","slug":"it-all-started-with-these-big-fat-puerto-rican-lesbians-living-next-door-to-me-when-they-got-all-high-or-something-and-tried-to-burn-our-apartment-building-down","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/?p=6853","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;It all started with these big fat Puerto Rican lesbians living next door to me, when they got all high or something and tried to burn our apartment building down. &#8220;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/badnewshughes.blogspot.com\/2007\/07\/diary-of-indignities-degenerate-and.html\">Patrick Hughes&#8217; latest<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>But anyway the two big fat Puerto Rican lesbians living next door skipped softball practice to fry up a bunch of coconuts and bananas, I guess, and I suspect they got all high at some point and forgot about the hot grease and shit caught on fire.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u00e2\u0080\u0099t know for sure if they were high. I mean, I didn\u00e2\u0080\u0099t think to ask them for a blood sample. In fact, I was kind of out of it myself when it all went down, drifting off to sleep by spacing out to a preposterous CD full of electronic drones and bleeps and blips. But even in this drowsy state, I noticed a particularly shrill bleep continuing between tracks. Eventually, smelling smoke, I realized I had been nodding off to the relaxing sound of a fire alarm.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Also: &#8220;Dark oblivion, where is thy sweet midnight caress?&#8221; what???  <\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/badnewshughes.blogspot.com\/2007\/07\/diary-of-indignities-degenerate-and.html\">Here&#8217;s the whole sad story<\/a>.  (Speaking of Patrick, I&#8217;m bringing <a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Diary-Indignities-Patrick-Hughes\/dp\/1595821031\/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1\/002-4966809-3496024?ie=UTF8&#038;s=books&#038;qid=1186052474&#038;sr=8-1\">his book<\/a> on vacation with me, and can&#8217;t wait to read it.  He&#8217;s one of my favorite writers on the web.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Patrick Hughes&#8217; latest: But anyway the two big fat Puerto Rican lesbians living next door skipped softball practice to fry up a bunch of coconuts and bananas, I guess, and I suspect they got all high at some point and &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/?p=6853\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[2134],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6853"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6853"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6853\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":62476,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6853\/revisions\/62476"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6853"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6853"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sheilaomalley.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6853"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}