The Sheila Variations

Oh boy - I ended up with exactly the same thing. And I also don't recall ever insulting someone's paperbacks - but will admit to insulting someone's record collection.

What is even better than insulting people's paperbacks is when your mere presence causes people to feel ashamed of their paperbacks and to apologize to you for their trashy reading habits, without your having to say a word. That is when you know you have truly attained the heights of book and language snobbery.

Didn't get a response from the quiz (too much traffic, probably). Regardless, I've figured out that my elitism is based on making fun of the people who wrote this quiz up, and misspelled 'sommelier.'

I'm thinking that puts me in some rather unsavory company in elitist-hell.

Speaking of insulting people's paperbacks, I have a friend who is a somewhat well-known romance novelist, well-known at least among those who keep up with that sort of thing. I did not know this about her until we had been friends for a while, and when she informed me of this, I told her that I had never in my life read a romance novel, whereupon she explained to me the useful social function that romance novels provide in giving women a fantasy escape outlet, etc. Anyway, I decided that since she was my friend, I should read her latest book, which actually had won an award within the romance novel community. So I drove to the local bookstore with the express purpose of buying her book, and there I was, standing in front of the romance section, several copies of her book right in front of me, and I couldn't do it. I just couldn't do it.

Bryan,

Well ... one doesn't really pick up a romance novel for the good writing ... heh heh. It would be like looking for complex plot points in porn.

Fast Forward. :)

"I never understood people who don't own bookshelves."

-George Plimpton

Once almost got in a physical altercation in arguing about the importance of the civil war and the factors leading to it. Got me the nickname..."Apples" as in "How do you like d'em apples?"

Sheila,

That was pretty much my impression, that these books were for women approximately what girlie magazines are for men. Of course, not having read any examples (other than Joyce's "Nausicaa", if that counts), my judgement was totally uninformed.

I'm an erotica snob. Or - an erotica elitist, I should say. Romance novels - like Harlequins or whatever - are unbearable to me. I like high-class erotica - I'm not much into the whole ripping-bodice costume drama kind of thing.

Also - I have to admit - I got a huge smile on my face about Nausicaa - of course it counts!!

Ok, now I'm really curious. You have absolutely *GOT* to tell me which books you have in mind! Somehow you don't strike me as a de Sade or Bataille fan.

Bataille? Oops. Not as elitist as I thought. Do not know Bataille.

One of my favorite sexy stories is Innocence by Harold Brodkey. So that gives you some idea of my elitism.

Bataille was a kind of forerunner of the postmodern French left. He was a philosopher, critical theorist, or whatever you call that kind of French intellectual, and he also wrote some erotic fiction. Dark stuff.

Actually, I'm not sure how elitist it is to know very much about that particular segment of French intellectual history.

But I intend now to read the Brodkey story. I've never read anything by him.

It's really just straight-out erotic fiction - the whole thing is one long sex scene - but there's so many layers to it.

I like other stuff, too - but the titles would reveal too much about my warped sensibility. heh!! The Brodkey one's my fave.

Oh, come on, Sheila. You must tell me some more titles. I want to read all this warped stuff too!

I was trying to think of some good erotic scenes from high literature. I think my favorite is from Stanislaw Ignacy Witkiewicz's "Insatiability," an incredibly weird and brilliant avant-garde novel. The relevant chapter is entitled "Asexphiated" or "Deflowerf**ked," so the original title in Polish is probably pretty interesting.