Dude, I'm just gonna have to take your word for it.
I was invited but I decided not to go, since I have misplaced by "genital bracelet".
However ... maybe I can attend next month which is - Easter Bonnet month.
Now I must drop the pose.
EASTER BONNET MONTH? A month where you get to be nude, wear "genital bracelets" (I'm sorry, what the hell IS a genital bracelet? Is there a difference between a genital bracelet and a cock ring? No, wait - don't answer that) and EASTER BONNETS???
I might have to picket the event. Just to check it out.
There's a lot that is funny in the article by the way.
"It's exciting to be in a restaurant nude," said George Keyes, 65, a retired junior high school English teacher.
Uhm ... RETIRED is the key word there. What a relief.
Health regulations mean staff must remain clothed even if they wanted to join in. And diners must bring something to sit on -- a towel or, for discerning women, an elegant silk scarf.
Sounds like a good plan. But I have to note the humor of: "discerning women" - what an odd phrase in that context.
Ordover's wife, Carol, said they first went on a naturist holiday five years ago and she found the experience empowering. But, she explained, it's "the least sexual thing you can possibly imagine."
I do not find this at ALL surprising, judging from the photos.
"Wearing clothes and going to church does not protect you from moral evil," Stafford said
I have read that sentence 4 times now, and I still don't know what Stafford is talking about. Whoever said it does? I'll tell you who. NO ONE. But also ... a comparison is being made there ... as though eating naked in a restaurant somehow DOES 'protect you from moral evil' - I actually sat here for a minute or so, contemplating what it all meant, what the actual message in that sentence was. I can never get that minute or so back, and THAT'S what annoys me.
Anyway, no harm done, I suppose. I don't care about nudists. Do whatever you want to do (although - I do find the Easter Bonnet celebration a bit alarming). Go to cuddle parties. Dress up as stuffed animals. Be nude in Manhattan. Have fun. But I have to mock you anyway. I just think it is highly amusing to imagine them all chowing down, naked, sitting on towels, in some New York restaurant. Wearing genital bracelets.
Posted by sheilaWell.. it certainly reads like the reporter had fun writing that article - "organizers specified no hot soup on the menu".. really??
And there's a, to me, worrying quote from the restaurant owner, "they're no different to you or I".. actually I think they are, slightly, different.
And the retired junior high school English teacher's full ensemble.. "a necklace, earrings and a black leather "genital bracelet" with red studs. And white sneakers."
White sneakers? with a black leather AND red studded 'bracelet'??... No No No..
Posted by: peteb at February 19, 2005 12:52 PMNow New Yorkers can be both "nude" and "rude?" Guess this trend identifies me a "prude."
Posted by: Bachbone at February 19, 2005 03:28 PMI am often rude when I am nude. However, I am never a prude when I am nude. But to be in public nude? I have to admit that then I would suddenly turn prude. As well as rude.
I'm a New Yorker.
Posted by: red at February 19, 2005 04:11 PMHealth regulations mean staff must remain clothed even if they wanted to join in. And diners must bring something to sit on -- a towel or, for discerning women, an elegant silk scarf.
This is a fairly common requirement at nude beaches and other venues. It keeps the various ass juices off the furniture. Why I know this, I have no idea.
Posted by: Mark at February 19, 2005 04:12 PMYou mean eating naked in a restaurant DOESN'T protect you from evil??? Devastating. Like finding out that there is no Santa Claus all over again.
"various ass juices"
Dude, some day, in the not-so-far future, someone will get to me by Googling that phrase. I will be sure to let you know.
On a side note: don't you hate it when you get various ass juices on the furniture? It sucks.
Posted by: red at February 19, 2005 04:15 PMI am often rude when I am nude. However, I am never a prude when I am nude. But to be in public nude? I have to admit that then I would suddenly turn prude. As well as rude.
Dude. The only time I was so lewd as to be in public nude...was in my dreams, where, oops, so screwed, forgot to wear clothes to school. I understand it's a very common dream.
Posted by: Dave J at February 19, 2005 04:33 PMDude, some day, in the not-so-far future, someone will get to me by Googling that phrase. I will be sure to let you know.
Just trying to bring in more readers for you!
Posted by: Mark at February 19, 2005 04:56 PMthis is one of those times when it's somewhat unfortunate that I have most of the dialog to "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels" memorized. (One of my favorite movies).
the whole "genital bracelet" thing makes me think of Michael Caine's character telling the misbehaving Ruprecht (the character that Steve Martin's character is playing at the moment), "Do you want the genital cuff?"
and: ass juices - that both horrifies me and makes me laugh.
I'd be afraid to eat in a restaurant nude; what happens if you spill hot soup down your front? Ow.
Posted by: ricki at February 19, 2005 05:16 PMOh man, Ruprecht's genital cuff...I didn't even think of that and I LOVE that movie. Even today, I occasionally run around the house banging a pot and shouting "Oklahoma! Oklahoma! Oklahoma!"
Posted by: Mark at February 20, 2005 12:58 AMNude yoga? Now that is some bad naked! I pity the back row . . .
Posted by: LIz at February 20, 2005 10:11 AM