For some reason, this random game tickled my funny bone. I got it from Annie … I had to type my name with the word “needs” after it into Google and see what came up. Choose 13 that kind of make sense. It’s so silly, but I just started laughing reading some of these, imagining me needing such things.
1. Sheila needs to get her spouse on board with their new eating plan if she hopes to improve her kids’ diets. [God, it’s just so true. As long as Cookie Monster is still allowed to spew forth his evil message, I will have an uphill battle.]
2. For formal papers, Sheila may need extended time requirements and one-on-one teacher assistance with revising and editing her own work. [To quote Bette Davis: “Don’t direct me. Edit me.”]
3. Dr. Yehuda says Sheila needs to get specific and address each of her fears head on, in a therapeutic setting. [Thanks for caring, Dr. Yehuda!]
4. Sheila needs to relax and recharge – she works at least as hard as I do [I almost began to weep at this one. I do need to relax and recharge! Thanks for noticing!]
5. Sheila needs help in getting her dream school up and going somewhere — anywhere. … [I’ve got a barn – let’s do a show!]
6. Sheila needs a speechwriter, however, don�t let that fool you into believing her not to be competent. [The person who wrote that horrible sentence needs a speechwriter.]
7. Please don’t hesitate to call and discuss any of your special needs for a/v or room setup. Sheila is very flexible and will be happy to work with you. [This one made me laugh out loud, knowing my technological challenges. ]
8. Sheila just needs to crawl back into her pit!! [I am guffawing]
9. Sheila understood the need for credible data, just as she understood the need for advocates and shelters – and was comfortable in both worlds. [I do understand, I just don’t care.]
10. Sheila is to design what the Iron Chefs are to the secret ingredients. … a mural in your bedroom�you�ve found a designer for all your creative needs. [I specialize in murals featuring Cary Grant, Stalin, and Janice from “The Muppets”]
11. The fundamental issue at stake here is that students who have specific needs similar to Sheila are increasingly becoming commonplace. [Thank God. Now I don’t feel so alone]
12. PRINCE NEEDS TO LET JASMINE GUY AND SHEILA E. IN ON HIS BEAUTY SECRETS. standard. [This was totally my favorite one of the bunch]
13. Sheila Sunday needs to do something different in order to get the biscuits on the shelves instead of another brand. [Sheila Sunday wants to say that suggestions are welcome]
I did this and this is what came up as the first response. Go read it. It’s HYSTERICAL.
No way!
That comments section!!
I’m emily, Hi, I’m emily, Nice to meet you, my name is Emily – that is so genius!!
I know! There’s almost 400 comments and the thread is TWO YEARS OLD and the last “Emily” to show up before me was YESTERDAY. And it’s all just Emilys saying “hi Emily! I’m Emily too!” to each other. Brilliant.
Miss “Jackie needs” to pose for Playboy. THAT made my day.
Jackie – ohmygod, that is so hysterical.
MISS Jackie??
Good God. This is just so spot on that it’s frightening to me.
“Ann Marie needs a family who can provide a great deal of structure and individual attention, and who will not take the fluctuations in her moods personally. …”
Apparently, I need braces.
“Beth needs to come chill. Beth will probably not. I want to be Beth’s friend.”
I SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO want to come chill at your place, Sheila, but Tom is off to China again. Waaah.
“Tracey needs to keep her little yellow mouth shut.”
Yes. My horribly jaundiced mouth.
I of course found references to my name-grain rather than my nicknonymous self. I certainly do not need hotter weather for harvesting.