At this point, my “relationship” with Dave Grohl (born on this day), is decades-long. I was there when Nirvana hit. I was swept away by Nirvana – and all their ilk – and cried when Kurt Cobain died. My sadness about the demise of Nirvana felt personal. It was like I had to say goodbye not just to Cobain but to Krist Novoselic and Dave Grohl too. It was like, “Oh well, that’s all over now.” I don’t know why I didn’t consider that of course these were young men, the survivors of Nirvana, and they’d go on to make more music. But Nirvana … It was so hard to let them go. I’ll never get over it.
I have a visceral memory of my sister telling me Dave Grohl had come out with a “solo” album. Of course it wasn’t a solo album, it was the debut of his new band Foo Fighters, but … we didn’t have enough information to know that yet. The internet wasn’t pouring us into the rumor mill 24/7. We just heard whisperings, inklings. I remember saying, “WHAT?” It was like a miracle. Light from the caves. Hyperbole required. Maybe you never loved something that hard, maybe you never felt like something died – something big – when a beloved figure dies … OR maybe it wasn’t Kurt Cobain for you, maybe it was something else. And that’s fine. But for me, for so many others, Nirvana MEANT something. Just like River Phoenix MEANT something. Phoenix and Cobain died just months apart: a watershed moment for Gen-X kids and young adults (particularly for those of us who were in the arts). Maybe these losses weren’t to the level of “The Day the Music Died” … but it was OUR Day the Music Died. So Dave Grohl, from seemingly out of nowhere, put out this rough-sounding album – and his band was called … wait, WHAT was his band called again? What the hell does Foo Fighters mean? I bought the album on cassette tape the week it was released.
What a thrill it was to listen to that first album for the first time. When I hear any of those songs again, I still remember the first time. If you’re not Gen-X – OR if you were one of those people who looked around at everyone crying when Kurt Cobain died and thought, “These people have lost their minds” (if you recall, much of the commentary was like this) … all I can say is: Maybe have some curiosity about what other people are going through, particularly younger people, and maybe consider that those “kids” know exactly what it is they are crying about?
It wasn’t just exciting that Dave Grohl emerged from Nirvana and still wanted to make music. What was even more thrilling was … HE was now the front-man. AND he was playing guitar and singing. AND he wrote the songs. Nirvana was, of course, a trio – and each of them were famous – but … you know. Cobain was the magnet, the light, the charismatic troubled center. Grohl said once in an interview that Nirvana was really “heavy” – the vibe was heavy, the fame was REALLY heavy – and the first Foo Fighters album was a way for him to shake off the heaviness. You can FEEL it in those songs. The release and catharsis. That long-haried boy playing drums in Nirvana had all THIS in him. Who knew??
What is even more amazing is that the Foo Fighters are still here. And they are the opposite of a nostalgia act, a way for people to channel their grief about Cobain or some such. I have said this before: the Foo Fighters have a sound that is often as aggressive as Nirvana’s, but positivity fuels it, not anguish and rage. I am not dissing anguish and rage. I need artists to express those songs, and Cobain was a genius at it. But positive aggression is rare! When I say “positivity” I don’t mean it the way it’s normally meant today – so maybe I need to find a different word. “Positivity” has been co-opted by every single emotional fascist on TikTok who want to regulate literally every individual’s response to every single individual moment. Nothing but “positivity” is allowed! No thank you. It’s the 1950s smiling-white-family-white-picket-fence conventionality and consensus-building-requirement in another form, but equally as bossy and conformist. When I say positivity I mean: an emotion and a drive on the side of life, of joy, of openness, of fluid and free emotions, of possibility. To me, that’s what the Foo Fighters sound like. And that’s all Dave Grohl.
I want to link to a piece my brother wrote about The Colour and the Shape, their second album, the one that launched them into the stratosphere (the first album being more like a tentative introduction). Bren included it on his 50 Best Albums list, and he says much of what I feel and much more articulately. Because that album … I honestly listened to it too much. I had to take a step back. I know the track listing by heart, because you actually listened to ALBUMS back then. Anyway, here’s my brother’s wonderful piece:
50 Best Albums, by Brendan O’Malley, #18. Foo Fighters, The Colour And The Shape
And now for some clips. They’re a little bit off the beaten path but I love them. Grohl was part of one of the heaviest bands ever – and nothing can take away my adoration of Nirvana – but it’s like he wriggled out of the chains of the kind of fame Nirvana achieved – wriggled out of the codependent anxiety between Nirvana and its fans – to find a new kind of freedom. He plays with Queens of the Stone Age (talk about HEAVY). He sometimes plays with Tenacious D. He appeared in a Muppet Movie. He’s all over the place. He’s free. And I’m happy for him. So two of these clips are Dave Grohl supporting other artists, and fan-boy-ing OUT, which I love.
First up, though, a clip Grohl isn’t even in. You might have seen this. 1,000 drummers gathered in a field in Italy, to play “Fly” – as a way to lure Foo Fighters to come play in their area (which they never had before). It’s awe-inspiring and – again – even without the Foo Fighters’ presence – maybe even BECAUSE of the absence – the joy in the music is almost palpable. Not the joy of the musicians, although that’s present too, but the joy in the SOUND.
Next up: Dave Grohl playing sideman to Rick Springfield, and he’s so into it he makes me laugh out loud. He is so excited to play “Jessie’s Girl” and is just so INTO supporting Rick Springfield, and it makes me feel like sometimes the world works out, sometimes it’s a good place, of tribute, honor, memory, collaboration, and personal triumph.
I have deep affection for this clip, Dave Grohl and the Foo Fighters performing “The One” at the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. Everyone looks cold. They’re outside. February 2022 was so close to 9/11, I still remember how deeply this joyful sound – and the joyful crowd – touched me to my core. For months I had been living in chaos, we all were, but New Yorkers more so. I can’t put into words what I felt watching Dave Grohl, his breath showing in the icy air, singing this joyful loud song:
And here’s Dave Grohl and Paul McCartney singing “I Saw Her Standing There”.
1. This is my favorite Beatles song. I made my choice at age 8 and I’m sticking to it.
2. WATCH DAVE GROHL. In the piece I linked to above, my piece, I compared him to Paul McCartney! So first, there’s the opening: Dave Grohl crouched beside McCartney, grinning and cackling with excitement like a little kid.
3. Once the song starts, keep watching Grohl. He’s so into it! He’s US, in other words, and yet he’s also famous and he’s also onstage. I remember a funny comment made by one of my Red-Sox-fan family members in the world-changing year of 2004 about first baseman Kevin Millar: “He is the closest thing we’ll get to having a Red Sox fan ON the team.” It made me laugh out loud because it was so true. And Dave Grohl is a superstar, but in this moment, he’s a fan. And he can’t contain himself. His vibe is almost like he’s doing air-guitar by himself alone in his bedroom. That’s how free he is onstage.
4. Listen to that audience sing along. It’s a Coliseum ROAR.
5. At around the 1:10 mark, Grohl comes back into the microphone. He does some harmony lines, but mainly he’s just standing there, playing, and staring right at McCartney, with a white-hot focus of “OH MY GOD YOU ARE PAUL MCCARTNEY.”
6. And then watch Grohl at around 1:24 on. I mean, that’s how we all feel, right? That’s what the song makes people feel like. From the moment the song was released to now, to beyond, that’s how the song makes you feel, that’s what you need to do when you hear it.
7. Paul McCartney steps back to give the stage to Grohl for the guitar solo. Look at the smiles on everyone’s faces. And please watch Grohl at around 1:57-1:60.
I don’t need art to be joyful. I like all kinds of art. Mournful art, cynical art, satirical art. But the ability to express joy like this – all of the guys onstage actually are in that zone, watch their energy, their smiles, their support of one another, their freedom – is precious.
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I saw Nirvana open for Sonic Youth back in the day. A band called STP was the first opener, and they were loud, hard and all female. I loved their power. But when Nirvana took the stage I was blown away very quickly. Kurt intro’d with “Hi We’re Nirvana and we hate heavy metal. ” There was some screaming and then Noveselic started with his bass and I was completely on board. Soon there was a mosh pit and I realized these were people who already knew about Nirvana, that they were a thing. Obviously I was there to see Sonic Youth. When they came on, I wasn’t happy with the sound. I couldn’t make out the songs it was so loud. So I went away, still a fan, but now with a new band to love. Went and bought their tape Bleach and listened to it forever. Some years (was it even a year?) later I was at the gym and Smells Like Teen Spirit came on, I couldn’t believe my ears or eyes. There was that tiny 3 piece band on tv, shattering through the pop wall, with an instant classic of a song, like nothing I could have ever expected. It was a great time for music. I never much had a mind to pay attention to the actual people who make the music I listen to. It’s really just the music for me. So when he died I wasn’t that affected. I felt a little surprised at how many people thought of him as a god, especially when that wasn’t so much a deal when he was alive. If I remember there were a few suicides after his death by distraught fans. But for me Kurt’s lyrics didn’t reach me. I responded to the songs, the melodies, the bass and drum handshake that put out such great rhythms. A song like Rape Me, why would that messaging resonate with me? But the tune did. It rocked. The words were incidental for me, they only needed to not get in the way, as stark as they were furious. It was energy, cadence and release.
About Dave Grohl, he is such a cool guy. I’m not sure he was the actual drummer when I saw Nirvana back then, but the guy always pounded loud with great effect. I didn’t make the jump to Foo Fighters. One of their songs was on Heardle days ago and I didn’t figure it out. But I was so impressed with him when he was at some award show, and he was asked what songs he liked at the time. His answer was a really tacky pop song that was all over at the time. I don’t remember the song but I remember loving how easily the choice rolled off his tongue. He was so confident and cocky but not in a way the left vulnerability behind, the vulnerability that comes with saying what you really like when you know it’s not cool to your people. That very small gesture impacted me for some reason.
What a cool memory about that show with Sonic Youth! I’m envious!
// There was that tiny 3 piece band on tv, shattering through the pop wall, with an instant classic of a song, like nothing I could have ever expected. //
Right? It really was such an incredible moment.
For me, “Rape Me” is about artistic integrity. It’s deeply satirical, and a good reminder of how difficult it is to keep your freedom when you’re in the belly of the beast. It’s almost a funny song when you think about it in those terms. Anyway, that’s my take.
// He was so confident and cocky but not in a way the left vulnerability behind, the vulnerability that comes with saying what you really like when you know it’s not cool to your people. //
Yes! He doesn’t care about being cool. It’s like Joe Strummer mentioning how much he loved Ricky Martin. Everyone who were all outraged and betrayed showed that they didn’t understand Joe Strummer – never have, never would.
Haha, I love how you just blew open Rape Me. Never thought about it that way. But there again, with good music, my brain rarely breaks lyrics down. As a child, I thought the Joni Mitchel song my mom listened to a lot went “poo doo poo parking lot.”
Yeah, I think of “Rape Me” as addressed to MTV – I think Cobain said something along those lines back in the day.