I keep forgetting to tell this story, and last Saturday, at my cousin Liam’s karaoke EXTRAVAGANZA, he and I got into this enormous Queen discussion: how much we love Queen, why we love Queen, what is special about Queen, how we like “classic” Queen, as opposed to their newer stuff … we are both passionate about Queen. I’ve been passionate about Queen since I was a kid. They are probably one of my all-time favorite bands ever.
Anyway, I have a story to tell about Queen which should provide a glimmer of hope for humanity. So shines a good Queen in a naughty world, and all of that.
Music lovers? Listen up. This is really cool.
Last year, I went into the big Barnes & Noble on 22nd and 6th. Why? To buy me some Queen. I am so behind in technology that a lot of my Queen is still on CASSETTES, and they are now garbled and messed-up, due to almost constant listening. Needed to go get me some brand new classic Queen!
So I go into the Barnes and Noble music section, and go to the “Rock” area, and … ehm … no Queen. Nothing. Not even an empty slot for them. Nothing. This is an enormous music store by the way. They have an extensive collection of Peruvian drum circle CDs. They have Charlotte Church up the wazoo. They also have every Christina Aguilera recording known to man. They have CDs of Polish music, Inuit music, Irish music, Russian music, Serbo-Croatian music, world music … you name it – it has a section. “Inuit Top 40 – right this way!”
But no Queen.
This knowledge took a while to sink in. And it actually kind of hurt my heart. No Queen? So soon we forget the giants of “the past”? So soon we throw out the old to replace it with the new? Can’t we at least ACKNOWLEDGE how important Queen was? Can’t we still buy their CDs? Must we trash our own history?
I sat there, over the Q section, being all existential and meaningful. To myself. Being all sad that Queen is already forgotten.
I sadly go up to the cashier. I try not to be angry beforehand. It’s not the cashier’s fault that we tear down our music history!
I say to him, “Hi there … am I insane … or do you not have any Queen? It has to be in the Rock section … but … I just can’t find it!”
Cashier boy says, “Oh, we keep all the Queen stuff behind the counter. You have to request it.”
Uhm … huh?
He says it so casually, so openly, that I say, “Why?”
Cashier boy says, “There are a couple of bands which we discovered were really high risks for shop-lifting, and we were constantly apprehending people trying to sneak out with them. So you have to request certain bands from us. We won’t keep Queen on the shelves.”
My existential sadness had turned to manic frenzied joy. Queen is a high risk for shoplifting? You have to request it????
I say, laughing, “What other bands?”
And heaven and saints be praised, cashier boy says, “U2 and the Beatles.”
I don’t know. I just found that so cool. U2, the Beatles, and Queen. Hidden behind the shelves at Barnes and Noble. Precious booty, always and forever!
Or are they all too embarrassed to turn up at the counter??
*ahem*
peteb:
Thanks for the sunshine, pal.
“They have Charlotte Church up the wazoo.”
Not going to make the comment this invites. No, absolutely not. ;-)
why do i hear the voice of apu on the simpsons…
“oh, you want the extra-large slurpy, the porno, and “sunday bloody sunday””
Did I press that invitingly large ‘post’ button again?
Where was the flashing sign??
well of course they are behind the counter. They are one of THE BEST BANDS EVER!!!
Pete – the fat bottomed girls probably sat on it and crushed the thing.
I’ll just have you know that I feel I have done the right thing as a mother, having read this post. Conor’s favorite Christmas gifts this year were his first very own CD’s- Queen’s Greatest Hits, The Beatles 1967-70, and The Eagles- Hell Freezes Over. He is 10. And they were from his grandmother. She picked out her three favorite CD’s and figured he would like them, too. Aah- all is right with the world. PS Obviously they were from Tom’s Mom, not Nance.
Queen is one of my faves, too. Every garage band in town used to play Stoned Cold Crazy and Now I’m Here. Before I knew Queen, I saw them and Mott the Hoople back in the early 70’s at The Warehouse, I think. The Hoople was the headliner. Further down the path of coincidence, we also have a bar in New Orleans called The Dungeon. It opens at midnight. Probably the loudest bar anywhere. Don’t know if Queen and The Hoople made it down there, though.
I think perhaps the Post button was hidden under the wheels of a million bicycles in some sort of … ehm … bicycle race?
I’ve been to The Dungeon in New Orleans, Rob. I must admit I don’t remember much. ;-)
It has that effect on people, Dave. I remember “loud” and that’s about it. I might add that it is not easy to impress me with “loud”. The Dungeon does.
Coincidentally, Queen representing the hope for (future) humanity happens to be the plot Mr Elton selected for the “We Will Rock You” Queen musical.
*ahh, THERE’S the Post button*
Queen – yes. Beatles & U2 – no. Something is very wrong in this world if people can equate the genius of Queen to hack “music” performed by has-beens.
Wow, david, thanks SO much for the vitriol. And thanks so much for the open insult you have just given me, since it is obvious that I love those “has-beens”. Oh yes, and thanks for the condescending scare quotes around the word “music”, too. Nice touch.
Not enough time on your hands?
I would say that your insulting comment is more indicative that “something’s wrong with the world” than my love for U2 and the Beatles.
Fucking rude, dude. You are fucking rude.
I was recently looking to replace my 70s-era Queen vinyl at Barnes and Noble (specifically, “Day at the Races” and “Night at the Opera”) and I could not find either one! Now I know why.
No Queen = no Foreigner, no Metallica, and every other band that owes something to Metallica.It’s the choral massing of electric guitars (thanks Brian May.)