Diary Friday

This is from the summer in between my sophomore and junior year in high school. That was basically the summer that was defined for me by the movie War Games. It came out that summer, and I literally FREAKED OUT when I saw it. Matthew Broderick was a revelation. (Sorry to the dude out there who thinks I go “overboard” in my love for actors. You might want to skip this post because I went way “overboard” in my love for Broderick. Wouldn’t want you to get all uncomfortable now!)

The passion for Matthew Broderick BURNED through me during that War Games summer. I had never seen him before. The crush was so crazy that I ended up traveling to New York by myself to see him starring on Broadway in Brighton Beach Memoirs. I saw him in War Games and immediately had to follow his career. It was that nuts. And … you really haven’t seen Matthew Broderick’s full potential as an actor until you’ve seen him onstage. He is absolutely incredible live.

So. I was in full-blown War Games craziness here.

Oh, and Mere – a quick note: haven’t you always insisted that we never saw Seems Like Old Times together?? Is that the movie that we have our ongoing controversy about? Or was it another title? Anyway: this entry PROVES that we saw that movie together! hahahahahaha That’s one great thing about keeping a journal.

JULY

Okay. On Thursday I went up to Warwick to see War Games. I thought everyone else was busy so I went alone. Turns out Mere had the day off! She kept saying, “YOU WENT ALONE? WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL ME?” The bus ride was awful. We took every back road and stopped at every rest home along the way. This old lady sat with me and she talked so much! She was saying, “My friend across the aisle – now she is a real talker. But she’s getting on in years. Now me – I’m only going on 82!” I glanced at her with respect. 82!! And she was so chipper about it! I hope I’m like that when I’m old. I said, “I’m only going on 16.” [Ha. Love how you want to be older when you’re a kid. And now? I never mention my age at all.] She patted my knee. “You’ve got a long way to go!” Despite my fascination with death, I do want to live long. I really do.

I got off and I had an hour until the movie so I walked around the mall, crowsed through the bookstore, and bought a soda. I feel so bad! I should have asked Mere cause it was boring on my own. I just hung around and walked over to the theatre and just waited blah blah but they didn’t open so I went back to the mall and wandered and then went back. It was boiling out! By the way, I brought my tape recorder. (What else?) [I had this illegal habit of sneaking tape recorders into movies I loved and taping them. This was before there was a VCR in every house. Before DVD release dates were announced in the New York Times. Once, say, Raiders of the Lost Ark disappeared from the movie theatres – who the hell knew when you would be able to see it again?? So I took matters into my own hands. I would TAPE the movies. That way I could listen to the tape, and imagine the scenes unfolding before me.] And I saw it and I taped it and I loved it.

A dim glow of a plan has formed in my mind. Listen. Matthew Broderick is on Broadway right now. He’s right in NYC!!!!!! [I suppose that means as opposed to Los Angeles – he was close to me, on the same coast, etc.] So what I want to do is call the Box Office [I love how I capitalized that – as though there was one uber Box Office – a universal entity called The Box Office] and find out how long Brighton Beach Memoirs is playing. I know it’ll be playing long cause it won Tony’s so it must be good. He won a Tony too!!! But anyway. I want to ask if he’s going to be in it still in December cause if he will be then I’ll just go then when my drama class goes, but if not – then I’m going to save every penny for a day-long trip to New York, maybe in August. Mum said yes, if I can find someone to go with me. But the thing is – if Regina’s in NYC then she can meet me at the station – I mean, if I get the money, I would be allowed to go!!

I just can’t fathom what it would feel like to see Matthew live right in front of me. When Jean and I slept out on the porch (it’s been boiling hot), we spent the whole night planning my trip and scheming.

[Crazy stalker paragraph following. Matthew: if you read this, don’t be alarmed. I was quite harmless. I just loved you so much.]

OK. Here’s the dreamy fantasy scenario. He rides his bike to the theatre [hahaha Thank you “Tiger Beat” for that information!!] so if I go – I can look in a phone book – becase as of now, people know who he is but don’t know his name – so probably he’s in the book [hahahah love the convoluted logic there] so if I find out where he lives I can figure out where he’d ride – so maybe I could see him ride by, or get a picture of him, or maybe even talk to him. (OK, I know you’re in hysterics. Laugh if you will, but if you want something to happen, then you have GOT to plan ahead.) I think at least the trip can happen. [And it did! I made it happen!] So tomorrow I’ll buy the New York Times and get the number [you know – to The Box Office] and call.

Can you imagine seeing him perform for real?? I really really want to do this. And see – if I take a bus and go to a matinee it’ll be a billion times cheaper – staying over is half the cost. So maybe I can see him perform, maybe meet him, maybe he’ll fall in love with me and invite me to dinner [In that order?], maybe I can throw a rose at him when he comes out to bow — no, I’ll be realistic. But I really want to do this.

Then yesterday – Mere and I were both bored to death so I went over her house and we sort of hung out – and we watched The Newlyweds like old times – Jayne was with us – and then on the spur of the moment, we decided to rent a VHS and some movies. [yes – I wrote VHS – I don’t think I really knew what I was talking about.] So Mrs. W drove us down and we picked out “Private Benjamin”, “Seems like old times”, “Quiet Man”, and “Victor/Victoria”.

When we got home, Beth was there – so the four of us went out to lunch at Newport Creamery. It was so fun. We had a contest as we were eating to see who would laugh first. Beth lost almost every single time. Someone would say, “Starting — Now” and she would immediately go off into hysterics. Mere and I lost once. All the other times, Beth’s outbursts calmed mine. I could sit there normally with no problem. But then — see, there was a poster up for banana splits and it showed a dancing banana with a top hat and a cane. Just looking at it was enough for Beth. But then Beth said, “Hey, did you guys do that in tap class?” and Mere said, “Yeah, but we didn’t have top hats” and I said, “And we aren’t bananas.” Mere looked at me and — we all laughed so hard and for so long. It was like we burst.

We got home and watched “Private Benjamin” while eating pizza.

My favorite scene is the wedding scene. See, she has been a spoiled brat her whole life, then she joins the army, and it shapes her up, and then she falls in love with this French guy – Henri – who is a jerk from the start but she doesn’t realize it. He’s rich and she sort of alls back into her old spoiled ways. He is such a — he sleeps once with the maid and is shocked with her for being angry and he makes her dye her hair red for him, etc., and then on their wedding day, Henri is late because he was over with his hysterical ex-wife Clare calming her down and cleaning up her place. Judy starts to feel doubts but she comes down the aisle. As the priest is talking, she keeps seeing glashbacks of all the times men have bossed her around, and she suddenly, right there, realizes what a dork Henri is. [Dork!! Ha! I’m so 15 years old in that moment.] Just as he is about to put the ring on her finger, she leans over and stops him. “Not so fast!” she says, with that Goldie Hawn smile. The spectators all stirred. Henri is baffled. Judy speaks in an undertone, “Henri, I know this is a very awkward time to tell you this but — I want to break up.” Her mother says to her husband, “Teddy, she’s gone crazy again.” Judy starts down the aisle but Henri grabs her arm. “What is this? OK, I slept with her once whiel you were away but you mean everything to me!” I love the look she gives him. “Henri … you’;re such a schmuch.” She starts off. Henri yells, “SCHMUCK?” She stops. Oh yeah, before he goes, “Look, let’s go upstairs. I’ll give you a shot to calm you down.” And Judy says, “No thank you. I want to be perfectly conscious when I call for a cab.” Then Henri gets really mad and yells, “SCHMUCK!” and he goes, “Don’t be stupid!” She glares, then smiles sweetly at him. “Henri, look! There’s Clare!” He whirls around eagerly. “Where?” And she punches him out.

It’s weird – the whole time I could see he was a jerk but she couldn’t. [Welcome to adult relationships, Sheil-babe.] He was a schmuck.

Then we watched Seems Like Old Times and then we went into the kitchen and just lay around talking. [You … lay around … in the kitchen? Were you on the floor … or …?]

We had eaten so much. We all started to feel sick. We had had a box of crackers, I had had a hamburger and fries, 2 scoops of ice cream at Newport Creamery – and then later – THREE PIECES of pizza. There go my 10 pounds. I can’t believe I ate that much.

On the ride home, I started to feel nauseous. So did Mere.

On Tuesday next week, we’re going to Block Island!

And on Thursday, Matt and Trav are making their professional debut up in Providence at a place called Perriwinkles. [Oh my God. Periwinkles. God. The memories.] Isn’t that exciting? Of course I’m going.

Oh, this is funny. A few days ago, I was on the phone with Mere and Beth was on the phone at Mere’s with Trav so what they did was put the two phones together and I heard this little fuzzy, “Hi, Sheila” and I yelled, “HI TRAV!” and he said when he listened to the tape (I am touched – he really listened to it) his favorite part was when I kept going, “I hope it’s coming out okay.” [Oh God. Obviously I taped something for him. How embarrassing. I literally was sneaking my tape recorder in to various venues up and down the Eastern seaboard.] Beth told me that he said tahnks for the tape and it came out good.

I can’t wait to see our SK boys up in Providence. I’ll tape it, of course. [Of course.]