Okay, so I haven’t finished a book in … 4 weeks?? 5 weeks?? The last book I finished was, I think, At Swim-Two-Birds
Here are the books I’m kinda sorta working on in a half-assed way – and the last one has definitely got a hold on me – I might finish that one first.
I just looked at this list of books and just have to laugh.
The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin
Alexander Hamilton
Flannery O’Connor’s Wise Blood: A Novel
Judy Blume’s Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret.
Gene Wilder’s autobiography Kiss Me Like A Stranger: My Search for Love and Art
And here’s the last book I’m working on – and this one has actually taken a hold on me – I look forward to the free half hour or so when I get home where I can sit down and just read it. I’ll be posting more on it”
Stalin
Simone, the cross-dressing palm-reading astrologist who we met the other night said that I was focusing on domestic stuff, making my house into a home. She kept saying that. “You’re making your house into a home … all good things will follow, once you create that home space …” Which is pretty spot on. She expressed what’s been going on for a couple months now. So I got the bookcases. I got the framed pictures. I have bought more plants. I am having guests over this weekend. It’s vulnerable for me to do that. I’m a hermet. My home is mine. A private space. No one ever comes over. I need to change that. I do believe that miracles will occur if I change my relationship to my house. My house, as of now, is CLOSED. No one comes over. It is a private dream space. Only I am allowed to go there. But … well. Only an idiot would not see the metaphor at work here. This has been going on for some months now – my commitment to changing my relationship to my house … and Simone, with her scarf on her head, and her red glittery lipstick, nailed it. Thanks, Simone!
So. It’s okay that I’m not reading too much right now. At least I got another bookcase to add to my domestic delights!
And there’s something about Stalin … It doesn’t surprise me that that is the only book I can focus on right now. It’s like he emanates a dark light of fascination from beyond the grave. I’m serious. I don’t need to WORK to be interested in Stalin. Honestly –I don’t. I’m on the part right now where the Bolsheviks and SRs begin their fight – but there are all these other parties involved – Whites, and invading Germands, etc. etc. Trotsky still in the picutre – but Stalin has already narrowed his sights. Trotsky is now “Enemy”. Soon Trotsky will be the Imaginary Friend everyone blames everything for. Oh, we can’t feed our own country? It’s saboteurs, organized by Stalin! No electricity? No railways? Trotsky did it! Trotsky did it! At this point in the book I’m reading – Stalin knows he will get rid of Trotsky sooner or later – but it can’t look like he was the one who orchestrated it. Stalin just needs to sit back … play chess with human lives … stay in the shadows … and wait …
The mixture of patience and ruthless cruelty seems very rare. Most dictators are impatient. But the ability to just hang back … hang back … Stalin had that in spades. Some Soviet official who worked with Stalin said, when it was all over, that Stalin had the deadliest of combinations in his personality: Laziness and capriciousness. If you think about it – that really is rare – and with someone who lacks human compassion – or lacks a conscience, it can be very very dangerous. Also: Stalin to me seems notable because he appeared to lack greed. At least for material things. Many dictators are undone by their own greed. They yearn for BOOTY. They want to live like a king!! They want cars, money, palaces … they will starve their own countries so that they can own a gazillion Mercedes Benzes. But Stalin didn’t care about any of that. He was impervious to money. He had no greed for THINGS.
So … to be patient … to be cruel … and to be impervious to monetary temptation … At the moment I can’t think of another dictator who had all of these qualities at the same time. Castro, maybe? Regardless, it seems to me that this is why Stalin was so terrifyingly effective, and why he lasted so FUCKING LONG.
Like I said.
I’m scattered.
im coming over..very soon!
I am preparing a space for you! CAN’T WAIT!!!
i found out that Showtime is free for all cable subscribers while im there and that is when they are airing the refurbished Liza with a Z…we must watch together!!!!!
You know, maybe it’s the Guinnesses (Guinnae?) I’ve had, but I think you’re onto something re: Uncle Joe:
to be patient … to be cruel … and to be impervious to monetary temptation
But it wasn’t just monetary temptation, it was human temptation. Oh sure, he had one or two mistresses, but certainly none of them were ever described as beauties from what I can recall, whereas many other people who are in his position do not hesitate to have a stable of babe-ushkas at their beck and call (and certainly I don’t recall reading anything about him prefering boys). He really wasn’t…human. I’m not saying he’s from Xenu (though it can’t be ruled out), but you’ve hit on what was/is so creepy about him.
And I’m going to open a few more Guinnie(?) and hop into the hot tub…
Bingley – yup. It’s like he came from another planet. It’s so true!!! And he did such a good job of erasing the archives of his own information that it’s kinda hard to look at the formative influences of his life. He personally oversaw the purging of the archives – he made for damn sure that evidence of his humanness did not exist.
But why? This is a question I will never get tired of pondering. Was it being beaten and abandoned by his father? Plenty of people are beaten and abandoned and they don’t become Stalin. Was it being beaten and unloved by his mother? Again: awful. But plenty of people go thru that and somehow refrain from killing 60 million people.
He stood at the grave of his first wife – on the day she was buried – and someone heard him say, “With her dies any warmth I might ever feel for another human being.”
That’s a clue.
But still: it doesn’t explain EVERYthing.
It’s a bit like Ted Bundy. Just like there are aberrations in the animal world – aberrations in nature – cannot there be aberrations in humans? I certainly do not presume to have the answer to that – but I do know that it is a topic that interests me greatly.
He was not vulnerable to the things that 99.9% of other human beings were vulnerable to. Why? Xenu? Who knows?
It was just about winning. He would win. He never forgot an insult. 30 years later – he made sure that all of his childhood friends were shot. I mean … imagine. Imagine that. Imagine a man who would remember insults for that long. Or – no, that’s not right: I remember insults I received when I was 7 years old. I remember the classmate who hurt my feelings and humiliated me in 4th grade. But what would have to happen to me to have me make sure that I then went back, found that classmate, and KILLED her? I mean, this is what we’re talking about here. He NEVER forgot an insult. He would ALWAYS win.
You read about him and it’s amazing … how he left no stone unturned. Really makes the blood run cold.
It makes me feel better to know that you’re not tearing through Hamilton’s bio…I’ve had that damn book forever and am CRAWLING through it. It’s interesting, but then after a few pages, I start thinking about the list of things I have to do and then…
I totally understand and I’m glad that I’m not the only one!