Paris Hilton
Jennifer Lopez
Mischa Barton
Ben Affleck
Ashlee Simpson
Hillary Duff
Jessica Cutler
I walked by Macy’s today, and there was a sign as large as a house: JENNIFER LOPEZ LINGERIE and I groaned out loud at the very sight of her name.
She has completely bungled (in my opinion) her career. She has squandered what she had going for her in the beginning, by letting her personal life take the front page – and by getting sucked into her own celebrity. I would be very surprised if her career bounced back from this nadir.
I just read a biography of Cary Grant. (Big shocker, right?)
Cary Grant retired in 1966, without any fanfare. He basically just withdrew from acting. He felt he would no longer “be believable” as a leading man (even though directors and other actors begged to differ), and he didn’t want to embarrass himself. Better to withdraw voluntarily. People in the business, until the very end of his life (and he lived for 20 more years) pestered him constantly. Wrote parts for him, scripts were still sent to him – he was offered millions and millions of dollars to do movies where he would have had only one scene. The answer was always No.
He was done.
There’s a lot to be said for that.
The author of the biography, in the epilogue, discusses this self-imposed retirement, in conjunction with his entire successful career, and said, “He never wore out his welcome.”
That’s quite a lot to say for a man who made almost 80 movies and had a career that spanned decades. He knew when to withdraw, he would do 3 movies one year, and then take a year off – to let interest in him grow again, to keep himself from getting bored, he always kept a low profile, he never (or rarely) did interviews, he was purposefully vague about his personal life in interviews … After his death, people who tried to piece together the truth about his life had a hell of a time of it. Because he would lie. Or he would tell half-truths. He would set people off on the wrong track. He thought that his personal life was nobody’s damn business but his own.
But his reticence had more to it than just a natural reserve about sharing such things with strangers. It had to do with his own gut-level understanding of what the job of a performer actually is.
He understood that MYSTERY is one of the primary factors that makes a great movie star. If the audience knows too much about you, then they might not find you believable in different kinds of parts. If you reveal too much, if you give too much away … then the audience gets bored.
My point of all of this is:
The people in the list above are, supposedly, at either the very PINNACLE of their fame, or just beginning the skyrocket up – and they have ALREADY “worn out their welcome”.
Oh and of course – feel free to add your own names.
“If the audience knows too much about you, then they might not find you believable in different kinds of parts.”
You know, I’ve always felt like this is the reason Madonna never saw much success as an actress. She’s shared every minor detail about her life with the public. I know more about her from tell-all interviews than I do people I’ve known for a decade. When I see her in films, I don’t see characters. I see Madonna and that’s not because she’s terrible at acting. She’s not.
Yeah. I think you’re right. Her overwhelming celebrity served her enormously well in being a pop music phenom. But not so much in playing parts in movies.
Oddly enough I find that Keanu Reeve’s lack of personality works the same way. His essential dullness shines through whatever role he’s attempting. Only the power of the Swayze made ‘Point Break’ the classic film it is.
Yup. Point Break. Classic.
The Power of the Swayze.
Is that like the Da Vinci Code?
Not to drop names or anything, but my cousin John Philbin was in Point Break.
she’s been around since Christ was a kid (at least in pop-cultural terms; in the real world that’s about 20 years) but Madonna is someone I just really don’t care to hear more about.
Not her newfound “religious awakening” into Kabbalah.
Not her line of treacly childrens’ books.
Not her “Oh, being a sex symbol is kinda last week, I want to be respected as a MOTHER now” attitude.
not her faked up Brit accent that comes and goes.
I’d also add to the pile anyone who became famous as a result of being on a reality show (possible exceptions: the winners on American Idol). And the “Newlyweds.” And anyone whose talent is outweighed by their notoriety.
And Michael Moore, but he goes into a special category of scorn for me.
ricki:
Ah yes. Reality TV stars wore out their welcome almost instantly. And yet … they won’t go away. :)
I’ve had it with the happily married bachelorette and her husband – can’t remember their names.
Ashton Kutcher never fails to bring out a visceral reaction in me.
I cringe whenever Bono starts to talk politics.
Sometime in the past year, I think Madonna’s public persona started to infect even her music. I’ve defended her in more arguments than I can count, but found her last album unlistenable. Oh, but it was supposed to be a brave statement against the war or some such nonsense…silly me.
Jeff –
Well, from the other side of the political fence – Charlton Heston’s acting career suffered for many of the same reasons. A fine actor. But he lost much of the mystery when he aligned himself politically and became vocal about it, and let himself get sucked into being a spokesperson.
He used his celebrity as a crusade for his beliefs. So much for the acting career.
Oh, and I couldn’t get thru Madonna’s last album either. I have been with her almost every step of the way …
Until the dreaded Kabbalah. Then I lost interest.
I loved her when she was the trash-talking diva from Detroit. Now she’s too pious – and even her music isn’t all that good anymore.
Too bad. But I still pop in “Vogue” when I need a little pick-me-up
“Not to drop names or anything, but my cousin John Philbin was in Point Break.”
Awesome.
The Swayze because he is a movie force to be reckoned with.
I’ve had an odd sort of regard/respect for Mr. Swayze that has gotten me into many an argument.
Jessica Simpson … it is sad!
I have a very high regard for Swayze myself. But because of Dirty Dancing, not Point Break,.
Oh, and it’s weird to link to myself … but whatever. I’ll do it.
I wrote this long rambling post about a romance I had in college – imagining what it would have been like, how it would have been interpreted, if I had been famous during said debacle.
I believe it applies:
http://www.sheilaomalley.com/archives/000822.html
The post about my romance involves me chucking a pretzel at his head at a party. You can take it from there.
I remember that post. At least I remember the pretzel-meets-head incident. Hehehehehe.
I agree. Madonna is not terrible at acting. She is not an actress. Period. It’s not that she can’t do it well, it’s that she can’t do it at all. To me, Madonna attempting to act (which means telling the truth and being open and honest….basically), is like a 98 year old postman becoming an Olympic gymnast. It makes no sence. The woman is devoid of the ability to devulge who she is, because she’s spent her life pretending to be shocking. She’s a sad little thing.
By the by Sheila, Jeniffer Lopez is going to be interviewed on Inside The Actors Studio. That James Lipton Thing asks her about Gigli.
Lord. Take me now.
PS
The fate of Paris Hilton is a multi layered shame that falls directly in the lap of the American Public.
We will make anyone famous. Anyone.
I’m a little conflicted about adding my own name to the list of people you “never ever want to hear about again”
a. Who is Mischa Barton?
b. Who is Jessica Cutler?
To sort of non-drop names, I have a friend (who works for me actually) who was a stuntman in “Point Break”. He is a really good dude.
He did a stunt, for the skydive sequence near the end of the film, where he literally jumped out of an airplane without a parachute, as Patrick Swayze’s character did.
The footage could not be used in the actual film because the insurance company would not cover it. Can’t blame them, really. In the actual film, my friend had a compact parachute on under his costume.
The current state of pop culture is astoundingly bad. The Hilton sisters, the Olsen sisters, the Simpson sisters, Hilary Duff, Britney Spears, Avril Lavigne, all the current and ex-boy-band members and reality show participants floating around the planet. It’s not the celebrities themselves so much – most of these people are just kids who are easily manipulated by the star manufacturing industrial complex.
But even the slimy entertainment industry moguls aren’t the real problem. The real problem is that we are not teaching our children how to discriminate between what’s good and what’s bad, what’s real and what’s pre-fabricated and phony. If the public actually RESPONDED to higher-quality art, we would undoubtedly see far more of it.
Any twelve year-old kid of average intelligence should be abe to recognize that Hilary Duff has no musical talent, yet she currently has a smash hit single that’s just a completely computer signal-processed cover of a great song by a band that does have real musical talent. If we don’t teach children how to make even the most basic qualitative judgements, we’ll continue to get more and more and more technology-generated crap.
I’m old enough to remember The Archies being on the charts. A cartoon band… with a hit that still won’t go away.
The Monkees actually HAD talent but were forced into being sold as commodities before they fought to show what they could do. Of course, their sales suffered, the show was canceled, the golden-egg goose slaughtered. And they still fight that ‘prefab four’ perception, 36 years later!
New Kids on the Block, two decades ago, were among the many who prefigured boy bands. The Beatles, after all, were a boy band by 1964 standards, with a squeaky clean image after their leather jackets & German hookers period.
If money can be made off of anything, we’ll certainly see more and more of it. I think it’s become painfully beyond-obvious that corporate Hollywood ran out of ideas long ago, thus recycling bad TV shows (and cartoons!) has become the new ‘high-concept’ in low-culture pandering.
Thunderbirds. ugh. Scooby-Doo (2!) – double ugh. I hear Gilligan’s Island and Petticoat Junction are coming. ugh ugh ugh. (and for you girls: Ewww.)
Same thing when SNL beats a dumb skit into the ground. (a tradition which, to their credit, they have self-parodied when they had Lorne Michaels address it on air, at least once.)
Pandering sells. More to the point, STUPID sells.
Teen boys are the prime box office demographic. Pop music is pushed perpetually to younger listeners, preteen girls mainly (before they turn to rap because that’s what the boys listen to, to be just like all the other white suburban gangsta/posa kids) who’d all be reading Tiger Beat in another era. No one ever said John Travolta, David Soul or Shaun Cassidy could sing, but they sold millions, so Disney product Hilary Duff isn’t anything new. It just isn’t about ‘kids today’ not knowing good from bad. Kids buy what they and their peers are sold, and always have.
Reality TV = cheap to produce; doesn’t require imagination (who needs writers? – that’s about money as well) and of course the folks at home just love to see people in fantasy TV situations arguing, being petty and fucking up; just so, nine out of 10 cynics agree, they can feel better about their own miserable lives. This goes way beyond the trailer park image of middle America, to the Prada clones around the water cooler. (“that Omarosa is SUCH a bitch! Nice shoes, though.”)
I often wonder what freaking good it does to complain about it; and forget voting in protest at the box office. My $8 and change going to ‘Before Sunset’ isn’t going to offset the grosses for ‘Princess Diaries 2’ one whit. (I don’t go to enough movies, the art houses being a long drive away, but I did cancel my cable and became a full-time movie snob, ordering things like ‘Persona’ and ‘Casa de Los Babys’ from Netflix.)
On the other hand, there will always be good art out there, conformity and dumbing-down be damned. (subjective, I know. aren’t we all?) I called ‘Harold and Kumar’ subversive in my print review ‘cos it’s a teen stoner comedy, but with a kind of ‘Powwow Highway’ sensibility, scenes of racial profiling, etc.
Some axioms apply:
Never underestimate (or ‘no one ever went broke underestimating’) the intelligence of the American public. (who the hell said that first?)
Ever get the feeling you’ve been had? — John Lydon
It’s so bad, it’s gonna be huge. – review of ‘Human Highway’
D
P.S. I know J.Lo’s partner in the underwear biz. I’ll relay your sentiments.
Add to list-
Tara Reid
Courtney Love
Nicole Richie
Demi Moore
Madonna/Esther
Kaballah
Nick & Jessica
The Osbournes
William Hung
Actually the fact that I know who these people are ..yikes………
dave:
Kaballah is a person? heh heh heh heh
“Have you met Kaballah?”
“Damn, I hate that guy. He’s so pretentious.”
Two thoughts- Firstly, Madonna evokes such feelings of rage in me, that if I were walking down the street and she happened to drive by and I caught sight of her- God help the poor bastard innocently strolling by me at that exact moment, for they would get punched in the head.
Second, I love Patrick Swayze for many reasons, one of which is the pottery wheel scene in Ghost, another is the fact that my husband looks a lot like him. However, in my humble opinion, the reason he never made it “BIG” is the way he walks. Kinda like a constipated duck in a very big rush to get to the bathroom.
CW:
I wish I didn’t know who Mischa Barton is. I’ve actually never seen her act – but she is on every page of the celebrity magazines (that I, hypocritically, devour on a regular basis). She’s in the TV show “O.C.” She’s 20 years old. She is completely over-exposed.
Jessica Cutler is that Washington whore who slept with political big-wigs, then blogged about it for 2 weeks, and now has a huge book deal. She can’t even write.
And about your stuntman friend:
How does one jump out of an airplane without a parachute? Then what happens??
NKOTB were two decades ago? Hm – seems like 1990, to me. Hard to believe they were on the charts at the same time as Nirvana and Pearl Jam.
Here’s a switch: 3-4 years ago, Mandy Moore would have made my “overexposed but talentless” list. I think she’s done a great job re-underexposing herself, and doing things that actually show some semblance of talent.
And if any of you tells my friends I just defended Mandy Moore, I’m gonna give you such a smack…
Mitch:
Your secret’s safe with me.
I have to admit: A Walk to Remember, starring Mandy Moore, is one of my many not-so-guilty pleasures. I own it. I think she’s lovely in it.
MikeR and Dan: Amen!
It’s like the economic theory about bad money driving out good: drek is driving out the good and enjoyable cultural things, and it’s really sad to me.
My general feeling is that when someone tries to move into an area where they’ve not had the bulk of their fame, most of the time they fail miserably (see: Madonna and acting). I feel the same way when any celebrity begins doing political commentary. I just don’t want to hear it, whatever part of the political spectrum they’re in. I want to hear Bono talking politics as much as I want to hear Don Rumsfeld singing. I want to hear Madonna’s take on the Iraq war as much as I want to see Condi Rice “vogueing”.
In other words, not at all. I’m not saying they’re not entitled to their opinions, but when those opinions seep into their music – or worse, they harangue the audience at a concert – that’s taking it too far.
heh. Condi Rice “vogueing.” Actually, I have to admit I would slightly like to see that.
ricki:
You took the words out of my … er … typing fingers. I would pay good money to see Condi Rice voguing. HAHAHA
Lindsay Lohan is one for me. For some reason every time I see her face, she inspires an uncharacteristically (for me) violent response. Golan Cipel is also climbing quickly to the top of the list.
allison: HA! I’m a bit sick of Lohan, too – although she doesn’t make me go into a rage (J-Lo does that.)
what about golan cipel? if i never hear his name again it will be too soon. and he’s only been in the headlines for what? a week?
allison:
Yeah, but he’s not really a celebrity.
I was going to include Scott and Laci Peterson in my original list, because I just DON’T CARE – and I am SICK of this murder case dominating the headlines (why? why is this so much worse than any other murder? They aren’t famous, they aren’t insanely wealthy – It baffles me. Like a husband hasn’t murdered his pregnant wife before? Of course he has…)- but since they aren’t really celebrities I left them off.
CW – that’s pretty cool, I don’t think it’s a non-name drop at all! I loved the sky diving scenes. THe premise (Keanu jumps for the first time and flies around like a pro) was BS, the stunt work/photography was great! Your friend must’ve really trusted the other guy to jump without a rig!
Sheila – my regard for the Swayze is based on two things:
1. The slew of very entertaining ‘B’ films he’s made: Red Dan, Road House, Next of Kin etc
2. An interview with him in which I call Mr. Swayze acknowledging that he may not be the best actor around but that he would outwork anyone. I rspected that kind of honesty.
sheila, ah, maybe i transgressed the rules of the game. but what about jessica cutler. is she a celebrity?
Well, now I see her along the same lines as Paris Hilton or the reality TV “stars” – she may have started out because she was notorious – but she is now capitalizing on it, and being applauded for his sluttiness, and courting the press like a maniac. Oh, and the press are courting her, too.
Oh forget the rules. There are no rules!! :)
It’s true that people have been decrying pop culture for a long time, but a certain amount of that will always happen as a result of changing tastes from one generation to the next. The big change I see, especially in terms of the music industry, is the extraordinary, exponential growth of the power of technology.
At this point in time, virtually ANYONE can be a singer. You just go into the studio, emit whatever sounds you’re capable of emitting, and then the engineers take over and massage it with computer software until they have an end product that will satisfy a relatively undiscriminating audience. The only “talent” needed is a hot body, and of course medical science can take care of any deficits on that score. For live shows, you simply distract them with dancing and other visual elements and/or lip-sync to your computer-generated recordings.
I’m not anti-technology – I earn my living in the IT field. However, if we don’t start learning very soon how to control and limit the uses of technology more wisely, the consequences for our society could be extremely dire. In the not-too-distant future, every single form of human endeavor has the potential to become a competition between software engineers. I see a profound lack of understanding of the implications of that phenomenon among the general public and that’s really scary, because the advance of what it’s possible to do technology is dead certain to continue at an exponential rate.
There’s always been the art for the masses right alongside the substantial art. There’s nothing new under the sun and it’s not worse now than it was before. The technology may be rapidly evolving and changing the game, but the impulse isn’t any different.
Beach Blanket Bingo was made in 1965. A shallow, shameless, ridiculous pandering movie.
Doctor Zhivago was made in 1965. As was The Pawnbroker (incredible movie) –
Etc. etc.
You get the drift.
Oh, and by the way:
about my above comment?
I also happen to think Beach Blanket Bingo is a lot of fun. I always end up watching it, if it’s on TV.
That doesn’t mean my tastes have disintegrated. I like different kinds of things for different reasons.
When I’m home at my parents house, and I’m driving to the beach – and it’s a sunny day – and I have towels in the back – I love to blast Britney Spears, at top volume, and sing along like a lunatic. “Oh baby baby … How could I have let you goooo….”
Great freakin’ song.
I also love the Go Gos, the Ramones, the Replacements, the Clash, et al.
Again – you probably get my drift. There’s always a place for both in our culture.
I’m glad you cleared that up, Sheila. I was going to disown you for putting the smack-down on Beach Blanket Bingo. Don’t mess with Frankie and Annette. Just don’t do it.
I realized – too late – that I had way over-stated my case.
Beach Blanket Bingo may not be on any stupid Top 100 Films Ever Made … but who the heck cares? Who didn’t want to crawl through the TV and live in those movies??
I have decided that ‘serious’ art isn’t for everyone. Many people just aren’t wired to enjoy Fellini’s films, the complexities of Miles Davis, the expressions of Jackson Pollack, etc. During college, I became an enormous snob(How big were you, David?)about jazz and classical music, disdaining to listen to anything I didn’t see as serious and intellectual. What a crock. Sometimes ‘serious’ can be tedious. We all need some visceral pleasures from time to time. There is a place for bubblegum music and car-crash movies. I don’t want to partake very often, and I hope my son wants more for his entertainment, but those things are enough to satisfy many people. Now, I believe there are many who could learn to appreciate better art if they were exposed to it in the right way, but I really think there are a lot of folks who wouldn’t care or wouldn’t like Fellini or Miles if they spent years studying it. In some ways, it mirrors my feelings about voting. If someone doesn’t make the effort to stay informed, aware of the major candidates and their stances, or hasn’t taken the time to register, I really hope they won’t vote. Their participation is likely to be counterproductive to an appropriate outcome.
I agree that there will always be parallel high and low-brow cultures – that’s not what I’m worried about. Think about what’s on the horizon. Once we have the ability to modify our own DNA, whoever has the best software engineer will win gold at the Olympics, have the best singing voice, score the highest on the SAT, etc. Once we have artificial intelligence that can produce art, or a close facsimile thereof, humans become unnecessary in the process. Whatever that may imply for mankind, it can’t be good.
Technology can accomplish many great things, but I fear that the technologies coming in the not-distant future will also have the power to destroy human society in an insidious but even more devastating way than would be possible with a cataclysmic nuclear war. The only thing that can save us is to learn to control and regulate this enormous power in a wise manner, but I see precious little evidence of that happening at this point. Technology is already advancing faster than our ability to figure out how to cope with it, and the rate of that advance is certain to continue to accelerate. If we don’t start to get far more serious about this issue soon, it may become impossible to ever get a handle on it.