In the film, the first time we see his compulsive repetition of certain phrases, it is as though some demon has taken over Hughes. DiCaprio played it in a heartbreaking way, as though he was scared of what was happening to him. He couldn’t stop the repetition. His eyes got panicked, and yet his body wouldn’t obey, and out would come the same old phrase, over and over and over.
I know that this is a common component of OCD. Along with other things like switching lights on and off, and certain tapping of fingers rituals, and washing hands 20 times a day.
My interpretation of it, at least from the film, is that, for whatever reason, in sudden unexpected moments, Howard Hughes would completely dissociate from himself. Another “self” would split off, dramatically, from his other self. The self that was able to function, and be in the real world. But suddenly – like a plate cracking in half – there would be two Howards.
And the one that split off to the side was the judgmental voice, the critical voice … the voice we all have, to some degree, inside of us. But most of us can control the inner critic, or even listen to the inner critic – see if it has some valid points. But if the inner critic gets out of control, most of us can talk it out of the clocktower, or calm it down. Like if I make a mistake, or if I’m at a party and talking with strangers and I suddenly feel self-conscious, or phony … there is that voice that comes sometimes, the hard task-master voice. Whispering in my ear as I try to navigate. “God, listen to you. You sound like such a phony. God. How do you live with yourself, you big fat phony?” Or when I make a mistake. It’s an unforgiving voice. “What a stupid mistake. You are so stupid.” To some degree, this unforgiving task-master voice is a blessing, and people who DON’T have it probably hold themselves in too high a regard. If you never ever think you’re capable of doing better, being better, correcting yourself – then you can be a big fat know-it-all BORE.
But what I saw in those Howard Hughes OCD attacks is that the critical voice took over. The critical voice won the battle completely. The critical voice, out of nowhere, started SCREAMING. And so Hughes, trying to please this inner critic, this unforgiving inner voice (the ghost of his mother?) – had to keep repeating whatever phrase it was he was saying when the voice inside started screaming. And to try, desperately, to get it right. Just keep saying the same words, over and over … does this sound right? Does this sound phony? Will this please that voice? No? How ’bout this? How ’bout if I say it like this? Until Hughes was completely lost in the compulsion, and would have to absent himself from the room.
I was very moved, almost to tears, at the shot of him, holed up in a car with himself, after removing himself from a party. He had his hand clamped over his mouth, as hard as he could, tears in his eyes, trying to STOP the repetition. His own body, his own mind, out of his own control. And yet … the conscious self, the real self, the one NOT controlled by OCD, knows that this repetition must stop. He is in between selves. The madness has not completely taken over yet. He knows the compulsion is out of control, and he is afraid, sad, trying to control it.
It seemed to me a very very sad thing. On one surface level (the level I described above, with the inner critic voice thing) I related to it. But the levels to which that inner critic (if that’s even the correct way to look at it) took over Hughes’ life struck me as tragic.
Hughes’ OCD was definitely tragic. I think that modern medication could really have helped him. It seems that some people’s brains are just broken, and the drugs can isolate the broken part so they can function, which is kind of miraculous.
It’s also somewhat amazing what he accomplished despite having a broken brain.
It makes you wonder: had the medication been available, would he have accomplished even more?
or would he have accomplished less? I have had friends go on various meds for problems, and they have told me that although it’s a relief to be closer to the “usual,” sometimes there’s a loss there – that there’s less of a drive to create, less of a different way of looking at the world. (I also had a friend who went on – I think it was Welbutrin? – who said she didn’t remember what she dreamed at night any more, if she even dreamed, and that made her sad, even though she knew the meds were keeping her from doing harm to herself, she really missed remembering the wild dreams she dreamed at night).
Actually, a common topic of conversation that my old friends and I used to get into was whether the world would be better off if everyone who was a little bit “odd” was medicated to become “normal.” I was violently opposed to that, thought meds should be reserved for cases where it clearly limited the person’s ability to function, but some of my friends made interesting points on the other side…
ricki:
I also can see both sides. Hughes was obviously a genius and very much ahead of his time. While his OCD made his life a living hell, would medication have tamped down the very thing that made him a genius? Antidepressants and anxi-anxiety meds are so much gentler now, there’s much more of a sytem in place to find the right “cocktail” – but back then, in Hughes’ time, it was much more primitive. They would knock you over the head with whatever drug they prescribed. And if your genius, your sex drive, your creativity was a casualty, then so be it.
I think drugs are much better now … and perhaps Hughes would have benefitted from a mild medication of some kind. That would not have cut off his creative vision, but would have helped him be able to live in the world.
Poor man. I really feel for him. But still … I thank him for his innovations, and … yes, CW, that thought occurred to me as I watched the film: It is incredible how much he was able to accomplish, working with the disability that he had. I can’t even imagine what it must have been like to be him.
I doubt Hughes would have accomplished more or less regardless of whatever modern medication could have done. His OCD issues did not define his accomplishments. Those things happened because the man was a flipping genius and wouldn’t take no for an answer.
Tell him he couldn’t do something, and he’d figure out a way to do it one better, OCD or no OCD.
There’s one scene in the film which was written and acted perfectly, and that’s early on in the film during the very early stages of what would become the H-1 racer. Odekirk says something to the point of “You can’t do that, the top wing will fall off.”, to which Hughes replies “Let it. Who says we need one, anyway? Who says we need anything.”
That line was the perfect summary of Hughes.
Hey Lion. No one is disputing his “flipping genius” and no one is saying that he is defined by OCD. But there was something broken in that man – and I find it fascinating how much he was able to accomplish WORKING WITH the disability, rather than just discounting it as immaterial or uninteresting. At least that’s what I got from the film, and from the little I know about Howard Hughes.
The OCD is PART of him. Just like Van Gogh’s madness was PART of him. Countless other examples would suffice.
The doses of SSRIs generally prescribed for OCD are higher than for depression, exacerbating side effects. I have a feeling that Hughes’s drive might have been affected, but by how much it is hard to say – his ego was so big it might have taken a licking and kept on ticking.
John –
I think there is some evidence too that the injuries he sustained in a couple of those big ol’ airplane crashes exacerbated this OCD stuff, pushed it to a new level, a less manageable level … not sure, though, when all is said and done, how OCD actually WORKS.
No one is, and any psych who says otherwise is lying.
Nomar Garciaparra obviously has a touch of it, and that’s all I’m saying. With his compulsive pre-batting ritual.
Whatever it is that he does – it has to be a certain number of times. The ritual NEVER varies.
I have a couple compulsions myself … silly mathematical mind-game things, leftover from when I was a kid.
Yeah, I agree it was a part of him, I just don’t think it significant to who he was, nor his many achievements. It wasn’t important to him, so long as he could manage or ignore it.
From what I’ve read of Hughes over the years, which is quite a lot really, he saw that disability as an annoyance to be dealt with when necessary, and otherwise ignored, at least until it began to consume him. While I agree that it’s a part of who he was on the whole, I have a hard time analyzing it given all the amazing stuff he pulled off.
Contemplating Hughes’ OCD, for me at least, is like talking to Michael Schumacher about gardening.
I don’t think that discussing the fact that Howard Hughes had what ended up being a debilitating disability takes away from what he accomplished. It’s a fact of his life. I think it’s really interesting. It makes him even MORE interesting to me.
Oh, I agree. It was a part of him, and in a way it makes some of the things he did even more amazing. I’ve just found the substance of what he did to be considerably more interesting than the metrics that affected them, I suppose.
You got me hooked, now that I know Howard Hughes had OCD I am definatley going to see the movie. Ok, my name is Mary, and I am 14. I have had OCD since I was about 7 or 8, maybe even younger. Though I do repeat things sometimes, my OCD is focused maily on organizing, counting, touching or holding things the ‘right’ way, and having everything just ‘so’. Before I actually knew what OCD was I thought I was insane, but once I learned of it, I new for sure that that was what I had. I understand what you mean by this critical voice. And yes, it is very strong for a person with OCD, at least it is for me. That voice is always in my head, and though I know most people have it, for me it critisizes everything I do. Like for instance, last night I slept at my friends house. I was sitting on her bed staring at a pair of shoes on the floor. Now the shoes were not positioned right, this sounds weird to a person who doesn’t have OCD, but to me they had to be fixed. I sat there staring at them, and the feeling that they weren’t right and had to be fixed kept growing stronger. So I decided to close my eyes and focus on the music we had playing. Some people might wonder if I know that it doesn’t matter how the shoes are positioned, that it’s not going to hurt anyone. And yes I do know these thoughts are irrational, but that doesn’t mean I can control them.
So I sat trying to forget the shoes, but then that critical voice popped up and said, “Get up and fix the damn shoes.” So of course I got up and fixed them, unable to take the feeling anymore. I didn’t just fix that pair of shoes though. No I walked around my friend’s room and fixed all the shoes in her room. I know this all sounds insane, but this is what constantly goes through my mind. If I step on a rock with my left foot it feels so wrong I have to go back and step on it with my right foot. I may step on that rock 20 times before I get it to feel right. So that is just a little insight into the mind of a person who has OCD, if you would like to hear from more people who have this disorder, I think you should check out this website, http://www.stuckinadoorway.co.uk/ It is a forum site where people with OCD, or people who want to learn about it can go and discuss it. I just joined recently and my name there is DolphinSwimmer if anyone ever wants to chat. You can also email me at dolfhinswimmer@yahoo.com
I have OCD, so the movie really spoke to me.
OCD is different for everyone, so it’s not like I’m just like Howard Hughes.
OCD is painful
I have OCD, so the movie really spoke to me.
OCD is different for everyone, so it’s not like I’m just like Howard Hughes.
OCD is painful
Yeah, your telling me. I just saw the movie today, and I have to say, it was good. I could predict many of the things he was going to do, or wanted to do.
CORRECTED VERSION
The repetition of certain phrases, as the repeating of certain rituals, in OCD gives the sufferer a mild feeling of extended reassurance. Imagine you have been cutting up chicken or something and something prevents you from washing your hands for a while and the juices dry there on your hands and under your fingernails. Imagine how good it feels to finally get to a sink and some soap. Imagine how good it feels to feel fresh water wash the suds and germs away. Of course the feeling is only temporary. Therefore, if you have a longer, more extended feeling of not being safe or being uncertain, often worsened by stress, then if you have OCD or no other means of reassuring yourself, then washing those hands several times will extend the feeling of safety and reassurance. People with OCD repeat until the feeling of danger and uncertainty goes away. It is kind of how it is like to sit in a rocking chair and comfort yourself when you are feeling bad. It makes sense to someone who doesn’t have another means of calming him or herself.
The repetition of questions gets them answers. Hearing answers is reassuring. Hughs may not have been as hard of hearing as he seemed. He may have very well needed to hear answers several times to “make sure” he heard right or that he remembered the answer correctly. It is more acceptable to be hard of hearing than to have a psycholgical illness, especially during his time. Repetition of words and phrases, sometimes lucky words in lucky sequences, also serve the same purpose.
Perfectionism, too, is very often found with OCD. Perfectionists, not just people with OCD, have a hard time finishing things because they are not perfect enough. Not being able to finish a movie or complete an airplane would be a natural thing to happen to a perfectionist. If a perfectionist had the money of Howard Hughes, then he or she could endulge the perfectionism. Most of us do not, so we just ask the professor if we can turn the paper in late. In the case of OCDs, it may very well take an hour to take a shower or get dressed “correctly.”
I have worked with people with OCD for over ten years now. Their path is very difficult. Being called eccentric is not fair. My heart goes out to people with OCD. The movie, “The Aviator” was particularly disturbing in that it takes you home to see what it might be like to have OCD. We hear about it, but we don’t often see it in action.
Recently, there have been several movies and shows involving OCD, namely As Good As It Gets, Monk, and Eleckra. They tend to glamourize it. As Good As It Gets says all you need is love and it will be solved. Sorry, it takes a lifetime for many sufferers of OCD to keep it in check.
Psychoanalytic approachs to its therapy are not very useful either, for little but understanding can be gained by exploring the OCD sufferer’s past. It is half physical and half environmental. The physical problems make their bodies oversensitive to disturbing thoughts. Their feelings of discomfort in response to those thoughts are more magnified than in the general population. Therefore, their need to medicate (perhaps related to Hughs addiction to morphine and codiene, not mentioned in the movie) or repetitive reassuring behavior is greater than ours. The compulsion, just like the compulsion for a smoker to light up, is strong. The feeling of reassurance, no matter how meager, is there, so the behavior is reinforced. Thus, we get habit that is very, very difficult to break, when the user (of cigarettes or repetitive behavior) finds no equally viable alternative.
OCD can be managed, but it takes a wise and patient therapist and an OCD patient who is very determined and self disciplined to do the work. In this day and age of consumeristic distraction, such ability to face ones own demons and determinedly self discipline oneself is rare. This does’t speak of OCD suffers particularly, but of society as a whole. As a nation of consumers, we look for a quick fix. OCD does not have a quick fix.
Ok, this is long winded, I know. There are some spelling errors, I’m sure. But I do know what I am talking about here, and I hope I have enlightened some of you and I hope I have give hope to others of you. And I hope that I have not insulted or hurt anyone.
Love to you all.
4
in regards to the people who wonder about what ocd is…it is a low level of serotonin in the brain.drugs today can raise the level to where the ocd is not as bad.ocd can occur at different levels of severity,ranging from fairly mild symptoms to very very bad.when it is bad it takes over your life..completely!ocd has 2 parts to it.the first is the obsession.this is where thoughts and fears get stuck in the brain and keep repeating,causing great anxiety.this is all caused by low serotonin levels,,totally,,100% physical..there is no behavior component causing this.the second part is the compulsion to make the fear go away..for instance ..a fear you havent done something right..so u do it again and again until that anxiety subsides..the fear never goes away thoughand soon u have the anxiety back and do the compulsion again.if the howard hughes movie showed him as being scared out of his whits of this thing,than the movie people had a good handle on what serious ocd sufferers go through every day.there are some shows with minor ocd sufferers,where the disorder is shown as “cute” of a bit quirky.i wish people were educated to the realities of how painful and disabling ocd is to a lot of people.have a look at the ocd foundations web site .
i hate ocd. watching howard hughes actually made my ocd worse. i part ofmy ocd is i feel like my genius is being withheld by my m moom and when i saw the movie it made it worse. like, just give into your compulsions because geniuses do.
i should say i was very surprised and happy and touched when i found out howard hughes at ocd, but it sort of made mine worse, although i definitely had it before.
I have OCD. OCD is caused when an upsetting event triggers you off. It can be something minor, for me it was an unpleasant scene in Phantom of the Opera stage production some years ago. It had always been there, I would panic about fires at night when I was younger and worry about how clean my hands were when I had heard of how bacteria on your hands can be dangerous but this would come and go. When I was 13 OCD took over me, it was like being in a prison that I was ashamed of and told nobody about. I eventually after about a year took hold my disorder and fought against it, it was so hard and I was only about 14yrs old, but I did it and now I am just left with the memories of OCD but somewhere in some small way it invades my life everyday, and in times of stress or worry it takes over more.
Anybody who reads this, anybody who is living with OCD or thinks that somebody they know is living with OCD, they must get help if they can’t help themselves.
Don’t live with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
My e-mail is spiceupthesugar@hotmail.com, please contact me if you need anybody to talk to. I’ve been there, and I remember it well. I can only say now that having lived with it so severely, I know anything is possible because I got over it as much as I ever will. I have a normal life now, and I want to help others, to have a life free of those deblitating disorders too.
Helen Edwards
As a lifetime suffers of OCD (5 decades) let me fill you in on OCD.
The DSM-V (the official bible for diagnosis criteria of the American Psychiatric Association) lists TWO OCD disordersObsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Obsessive-Compulsive PERSONALITY Disorder (OCPD).
OCPD roughly corresponds to the colloquial or laypersons use of the term obsessive-compulsive. These people are the ones usually described as neat freaks or control freaks.
OCD is much different from OCPD. For instance, people think that OCD people should have spotless bedrooms or apartments. Usually the opposite is true.
Read any book about Hughes and you can see while he isolated himself from the world and gave exacting instructions on sanitationsee his procedures for getting his hearing aid cord or opening a can of foodyet he went without bathing for years and even lived in his urine and excrement.
OCD, unlike OCPD, has since the mid 1980s universally believed to be of biological origin. Before the use of medicine as I understand it, there have been no documented cases in any medical literature of OCD having been cured.
With the development of PET scans it was learned that OCD people have much greater activity in the frontal lopes and in the basil gangia.
The medicines used to treat OCD were usually developed for treating depressants (SSRIs: Prozac, Zoloft, etc.). However, the OCD person generally takes about 4-5 times the dosage than someone taking it for depression.
Needless to say, the side effectsincluding sexual dysfunctionare greater.
The compulsive behavior, the rituals that people associate with OCD are mechanisms to neutralize instance anxiety that come form the obsessive thoughts. These are better described as intrusive thoughts or invasive thoughts. The obsessive in OCD has nothing to do with pleasure or desireor even repressed or latent desire.
For example, a person who develops when has been dubbed gay OCD is a genuine heterosexual who intensely fears committing a homosexual act. A real homosexual would obsess about something else that is equally repugnant to them.
Religious people have a manifestation called scrupulosity. This might be a fear of committing blasphemy, the unpardonable sin.
If the person is a Christian, it might be some obscene thoughts about Jesus. If a person is an Orthodox Jew, it might be about Moses, and so forth for other religions.
In short, the thing a people obsesses about something they find most repelling, degrading and shameful.
OCD is a much more debilitating disease than what most people think it is. Generally the younger one is when they develop OCD the more severe and intractable it is.
One study showed that 70% of men who developed OCD during or before adolescence were CELIBATE, not just single, THROUGHOUT their life. Even in countries such as India where celibacy is definitely against the culture OCD people had very high rates of celibacy.
Even Howard Hughes with his bevy of starlets that he was either engaged to (Katharine Hepburn, Ginger Rogers) or had affair with (reads like a whos who or the thirties movies stars) became celibate at the end of his life.
Having had OCD since early childhood, I cannot remember not having it and having to keep it a deep secret for many decades, I resent people making light of the disease.
Everybody I talk to has a touch of OCD. To me that is like having a a touch of incest.
Unlike Howard Hughes, I did not have millions to hire my own Mormon mafia to carry out my rituals. I had developed a plethora of stratagems and ruses to co-opt people to carry out my ritualsunbeknownst to them.
But that is another story.
As a lifetime suffers of OCD (5 decades) let me fill you in on OCD.
The DSM-V (the official bible for diagnosis criteria of the American Psychiatric Association) lists TWO OCD disordersObsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Obsessive-Compulsive PERSONALITY Disorder (OCPD).
OCPD roughly corresponds to the colloquial or laypersons use of the term obsessive-compulsive. These people are the ones usually described as neat freaks or control freaks.
OCD is much different from OCPD. For instance, people think that OCD people should have spotless bedrooms or apartments. Usually the opposite is true.
Read any book about Hughes and you can see while he isolated himself from the world and gave exacting instructions on sanitationsee his procedures for getting his hearing aid cord or opening a can of foodyet he went without bathing for years and even lived in his urine and excrement.
OCD, unlike OCPD, has since the mid 1980s universally believed to be of biological origin. Before the use of medicine as I understand it, there have been no documented cases in any medical literature of OCD having been cured.
With the development of PET scans it was learned that OCD people have much greater activity in the frontal lopes and in the basil gangia.
The medicines used to treat OCD were usually developed for treating depressants (SSRIs: Prozac, Zoloft, etc.). However, the OCD person generally takes about 4-5 times the dosage than someone taking it for depression.
Needless to say, the side effectsincluding sexual dysfunctionare greater.
The compulsive behavior, the rituals that people associate with OCD are mechanisms to neutralize instance anxiety that come form the obsessive thoughts. These are better described as intrusive thoughts or invasive thoughts. The obsessive in OCD has nothing to do with pleasure or desireor even repressed or latent desire.
For example, a person who develops when has been dubbed gay OCD is a genuine heterosexual who intensely fears committing a homosexual act. A real homosexual would obsess about something else that is equally repugnant to them.
Religious people have a manifestation called scrupulosity. This might be a fear of committing blasphemy, the unpardonable sin.
If the person is a Christian, it might be some obscene thoughts about Jesus. If a person is an Orthodox Jew, it might be about Moses, and so forth for other religions.
In short, the thing a people obsesses about something they find most repelling, degrading and shameful.
OCD is a much more debilitating disease than what most people think it is. Generally the younger one is when they develop OCD the more severe and intractable it is.
One study showed that 70% of men who developed OCD during or before adolescence were CELIBATE, not just single, THROUGHOUT their life. Even in countries such as India where celibacy is definitely against the culture OCD people had very high rates of celibacy.
Even Howard Hughes with his bevy of starlets that he was either engaged to (Katharine Hepburn, Ginger Rogers) or had affair with (reads like a whos who or the thirties movies stars) became celibate at the end of his life.
Having had OCD since early childhood, I cannot remember not having it and having to keep it a deep secret for many decades, I resent people making light of the disease.
Everybody I talk to has a touch of OCD. To me that is like having a a touch of incest.
Unlike Howard Hughes, I did not have millions to hire my own Mormon mafia to carry out my rituals. I had developed a plethora of stratagems and ruses to co-opt people to carry out my ritualsunbeknownst to them.
But that is another story.
As a lifetime suffers of OCD (5 decades) let me fill you in on OCD.
The DSM-V (the official bible for diagnosis criteria of the American Psychiatric Association) lists TWO OCD disordersObsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Obsessive-Compulsive PERSONALITY Disorder (OCPD).
OCPD roughly corresponds to the colloquial or laypersons use of the term obsessive-compulsive. These people are the ones usually described as neat freaks or control freaks.
OCD is much different from OCPD. For instance, people think that OCD people should have spotless bedrooms or apartments. Usually the opposite is true.
Read any book about Hughes and you can see while he isolated himself from the world and gave exacting instructions on sanitationsee his procedures for getting his hearing aid cord or opening a can of foodyet he went without bathing for years and even lived in his urine and excrement.
OCD, unlike OCPD, has since the mid 1980s universally believed to be of biological origin. Before the use of medicine as I understand it, there have been no documented cases in any medical literature of OCD having been cured.
With the development of PET scans it was learned that OCD people have much greater activity in the frontal lopes and in the basil gangia.
The medicines used to treat OCD were usually developed for treating depressants (SSRIs: Prozac, Zoloft, etc.). However, the OCD person generally takes about 4-5 times the dosage than someone taking it for depression.
Needless to say, the side effectsincluding sexual dysfunctionare greater.
The compulsive behavior, the rituals that people associate with OCD are mechanisms to neutralize instance anxiety that come form the obsessive thoughts. These are better described as intrusive thoughts or invasive thoughts. The obsessive in OCD has nothing to do with pleasure or desireor even repressed or latent desire.
For example, a person who develops when has been dubbed gay OCD is a genuine heterosexual who intensely fears committing a homosexual act. A real homosexual would obsess about something else that is equally repugnant to them.
Religious people have a manifestation called scrupulosity. This might be a fear of committing blasphemy, the unpardonable sin.
If the person is a Christian, it might be some obscene thoughts about Jesus. If a person is an Orthodox Jew, it might be about Moses, and so forth for other religions.
In short, the thing a people obsesses about something they find most repelling, degrading and shameful.
OCD is a much more debilitating disease than what most people think it is. Generally the younger one is when they develop OCD the more severe and intractable it is.
One study showed that 70% of men who developed OCD during or before adolescence were CELIBATE, not just single, THROUGHOUT their life. Even in countries such as India where celibacy is definitely against the culture OCD people had very high rates of celibacy.
Even Howard Hughes with his bevy of starlets that he was either engaged to (Katharine Hepburn, Ginger Rogers) or had affair with (reads like a whos who or the thirties movies stars) became celibate at the end of his life.
Having had OCD since early childhood, I cannot remember not having it and having to keep it a deep secret for many decades, I resent people making light of the disease.
Everybody I talk to has a touch of OCD. To me that is like having a a touch of incest.
Unlike Howard Hughes, I did not have millions to hire my own Mormon mafia to carry out my rituals. I had developed a plethora of stratagems and ruses to co-opt people to carry out my ritualsunbeknownst to them.
But that is another story.
I suffer from OCD and OCPD as well. I agree with you Rex on how OCD can be a debilitating disease, ceratinly it has its ups and downs but one would more likely not want to have it. I have seen the “Aviatior” once, and thought it was spectactular. Howard Hughes exhibited traits of OCD and of course a creative vision, a key component of a genius. I also thought that Leonardo DiCaprio portrayed Howard Hughes perfectly, coming from someone like myself I thought it was pretty amazing and an inspiration to all of us who have or have experienced OCD/OCPD at one time or another in your life. Rex, I ceratinly feel for you, I hope that you get on the right path to recovery. Rex getting back on subject I have to agree, it can have some upsides, you can notice all sorts of detail you never thought you could see before. The downside, you CAN NOT GET ANYTHING DONE! OCPD however, has more downsides, it has NOTHING to do with neurotransmitters in the brain, but rather a thinking defect or I read somewhere it is philosophy defect. Rex you are obviously brilliant so I do not have to inform you about this, but it is just some insight! John: it is kind of like a stain that is hard to get rid of, almost like a permanent marker on a white cotton shirt, nobody wants an ink stain on their shirt but if someone with OCD gets it on their shirt, they either have to get a new one, buy 2 more, white it out with bleach, or avoid the situation in general, does that make it a little easier to understand. Someone with OCD will take ideas to a new level kind of like Howard Hughes. Like, Howard Hughes, some examples seen in the film were:1.)When one of the peas was taken from his plate during the banquet he did not even attempt to eat the meal at all 2.) Another seen is when he is viewing “Hell’s Angels” in his screening room he asks his friend for someodd chocolate chip cookies, but the chocolate chips could not touch the edges 3.) Also, when he was in the washroom, he brought in his own bar of soap, fearing that the soap provided in the washroom might have germs on it, also a fear a germs is mistakened for germophobia, rather its scientific name is spermophobia or spermatophobia or mysophobia, but do not not worry about that! I know first hand experience how unreasonable OCD can be, but one critical piece of advice that all people who come in contact with someone who has OCD or a family member with OCD, be patient we will change, maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday. Time for Jeopardy!
Hello, my name is Jake Whitlatch. I practice neurology in the Arkansas Children’s Hospital. I have just seen the movie and it was one of the worst cases of the illness of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder that I have ever seen. If he was really that bad it was amazing that he lived an ordinary life. I have been practicing neurology for five years and was a psycologist for ten years before that. His case was very severe. OCD can be caused by the brain’s neurotransmitters going off at an abnormally fast rate. Whenever this occurs it usually causes hallucinations however this is usually only in sever and very advanced cases of the devoustating illness. However symtoms of this illness can be passed down by living with a persion with the disease, in this case his mother and grandmother both had very extreme cases of the terrible monstrosity of an illness.
Sincerely,
Jacob Whitlatch, M.D.
well i am 24 year old male. for past 18 months(i think) my OCD has got worsem it all started when I was 16 but only last year I noticed it is OCD i mean I knew things about OCD but never thought what I suffer is so close to OCD and I used to suprass my thoughts much easier before i mean at most they would stay with my for about a year:P anyway my OCD a “gay spike” i fear i becoming or being gay. All my sexual dreams have been about girls, but recently especially that i have learned about the importance of dreams and sexuality i used to fear that i see my self in homosexual acts in my dream as a resualt i have been having semi-sexual dreams about same sex if you could ever call them sexual dreams the thing is that when i am dreaming (non of them have been wet dreams) it is with sort of anxiety and it is like i am checking myself in my dream. but in the last one i was less anxious and it was i kissed my bi firend on his head and his head was wierd to me and i sat next to him and i heard things that when i was awake i always feard that if i hear such things what would my reaction would be ot what should it be…(i felt about these for a while about a week a go) and now they were in my dream. it is funny to know that i dreamed abou this before of after i dreamed about losing the girl that i love and she does not love me, both drams happened in the same night. all day i am checking myself to see if i get sexually aroused to same sex things and it looks like they happen in my dreams to, what is bothering me is that if what i dreamed about last night had nothing to do with OCD and like i actually fancy that my bi firend. i have to say that i personally think it must some how relate to my OCD because in that particular dream which his parents were also ther i was dreaming about a firend that i was freaked out to hear that he is Bi u see because i think if i was gay i would have had dreams about straight guys too. at times that i have been awake i have imagined hearing things and also many other things from him to see if i get sexualy aroused or not but what bothers me is that if i get emotionally aroused in my dream or not because after i learned that homosexuality also invloves emtional attraction i have been searching and checking to see if i get emtionally attracted to same sex in certain situations and in my dream last night was one of those situations which i always feared about. luckily i was not sexualy aroused, even when i am awake i dont get sexually aroused by sane sex situtation (i have tried gay porns many time with no feelings) but this emotional part is the part that i can not understand. But i am sure that in the dream that the girl who i love was involved i felt like i wana cry but with my bi friend i was jut not sure, i think thats the problem all OCD people have not sure with their emotions
Hi,
My name is Ross Schneiderman and I’m a freelance journalist trying to write an article about “Gay OCD.” I’m looking for anyone with this disorder who would be willing to talk to me about it either via email or in person in New York City. In the article I of course won’t use your real name. If you’d be willing to speak with me and spread awareness about this particular type of OCD, I would grealty appreciate it. Please contact me at either rmschneiderman@lycos.com or ross.schneiderman@newsweek.com. Thanks for your time.
Ross, hey you spelled G-R-E-A-T-L-Y wrong, hey we all make mistakes!
Ryan – what a fucking obnoxious comment. I hate it when people correct spelling in comments. It’s pissy, trivial, and stupid.
Hi, I’m cara. I have OCD and ironically enough, as I type I am repeating ‘Anyway’ just like Howard repeated ‘the way of the future’ at the end of the movie.
its no picknick and its really hard to type and talk at the same time. OCD is caused by an imbalance in chemicals in the brain. It causes thoughts not to be fully processed. That’s why some people wash their hands. they KNOW they did it, but as you said, its like there’s two people. the person and the mind. the person knows they washed their hands, but the mind doesn’t care. the mind makes them do it again.
i could talk to you in depth some more, but as a mear 14 year old, i can’t juggle this typing/talking thing any longer. i’m gonna try and stop babbling now -_- feel free to email me with comments. i should stop by then :D
hey to everyone.
I loved the movie AVAITOR. It truly moved me. It moved me because I suffer with O.C.D. I started crying at one point of the movie. That was the part when Howard Hughes went into the lavatory to wash his hands and you could see the cuts from where he had washed his hands so much. Then he went to leave but wasnt able to touch the door knob and waited until someone came in. I cried, because I have been in that same position. I cried because I know what it is like to be a slave to your very own mind.
O.C.D is basically the devil on your shoulder. It tells you, that if you dont do a certain thing a certain way, then something bad will happen. Lets say for instance. If I brushed my teeth, I would have to spit four times, if I didnt brush four times, then something bad would happen to my family. Here’s another example. If I didn’t say “amen” four times, after each prayer, then God would punish me.
O.C.D plays on your fears and it tricks you into thinking that your under control when you do these ritualistic compulsions.
O.c.d also plays on your short term memory. Like locking or shutting the door. As a matter of fact. An hour ago, I shut my door 4 times because I couldnt remember if I had shut it completley less than a second ago. I can lock my doors then as soon as i locked them, I’m not sure if I locked them or not. Actually, I KNOW i locked them, yet the O.C.D is there saying “you sure?”
O.C.D is definatley hard to live with, an sometimes, you just want to give up like Howard Hughes did.
My will is strong though.
I come to this discussion a bit late…
I have had to live with OCD for over 40 years now. And mine is considered severe to borderline extreme. I am, for the most, part afflicted with the classic contamination type. Unfortunately I am also in the 40% group that is not responsive to current treatment. And believe me I have tried it all. More then once. I have even been offered both types of surgery, which I have declined.
As has been stated above, no one knows the exact cause, though it’s biological. Environment and life experience etc. plays a role in shaping the form of the obsession but has little or nothing to do with it’s cause. Life experience does not cause OCD. You are born with it. It does get worse in stressful situations and often appears as a discrete problem for the first time around something stressful but that is probably more coincidental then anything as we all have stressful events all the time.
I can tell you the exact day and time when my current form started. I was walking across my living room. But I had OCD long before that, as a child it was the form called scrupulosity (religious content).
Recently they discovered that a certain mutation on a certain gene is present in virtually everyone (tested) who has OCD but even more interesting is that a second mutation on the same gene is present in folks who are non responsive to treatment.
So progress is being made and they keep getting these little hints about how it functions. Just the other day a study came out that showed that giving men, with OCD, some estrogen results in pretty marked reduction in symptoms. Doesn’t work for woman. So they keep getting these little clues.
Hopefully and soon they will have treatments that work for most and are less difficult to do.
Currently the medication used have to be taken at very high doses, so the resultant side effects are not pleasant (sexual dysfunction, massive gain or loss, hair falling out etc.) and CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) which is the current gold standard in treatment is brutally hard to do
OCD is very difficult to understand if you do not have it. In part because it is very familiar. Everybody has similar thoughts and concerns and for the majority of people they are just that-thoughts. So somebody with OCD explaining what it is they fear will almost always here from the person they are talking to that they too feel that or do that or something along those lines. the big difference is in OCD these thoughts, fears and concerns take on their own life and take over yours. We know that what we fear is stupid and strange. And that other people do not have this problem. But we cannot stop the thoughts. They just get stuck there. And the anxiety grows and builds until it is everything. So you find ways to neutralize the fear and compulsion starts. And soon that is as bad as the anxiety so you develop avoidance and seek reassurance and it goes on and on.
That’s what happened to Hughes. He was in a position, being rich and able to pay people to do things, just about anything, to give in completely to his OCD and not fight it at all and then end result was not pretty.
Most people with OCD get through life, though it robs them of a lot of joy. And there is a lot of lost potential out there. Lost in the battles being fought within our own minds. It is a hellish disorder to live with.
There is hope for OCD sufferers. I am glad to see more people becoming aware of OCD and that there is treatment.
N
Here’s my memories…a voice clearly told me, “Your mother has not long to live”. I then thought that God would punish me by “killing” my mother if I was not perfect! I tried to be perfect. It was maddening at school, at home, everywhere, every second. Horrible, cursing thoughts toward God would go through my head and I would then ask for forgiveness over and over again, until…for years, this same sentence was always in my mind, “forgive me, in the name of Jesus”. Geez, it was absolutely draining and so scary to think of making God mad. What a vicious cycle of total insanity for a 14 year old girl who loved God. I would envision cancer cells that I’d seen enlarged in a science book – everywhere. They’d be in grose places like the lining of nose or rectem or ears- in clusters always making have cold chills to be so grosed out, and yet, I didn’t know how to stop the thoughts. I’d wash dishes over and over again, (never my hands, thank God I was spared that insanity) around and around the rims of drinking glasses- in case I had not gone completely around, I’d go over the plate over and over again in case I had not quite got it…in case there was a glass sliver on it when I’d chipped a glass while washing..I’d rewash the entire drainer of dishes…for if the sliver was there then…Mom would die..It was always my poor Mom!Somehow God would kill my mom to punish me. Isn’t that insane? I really felt such empathy for Howard Hughes. The awareness, the unstoppableness.. Where did I get that God would kill mom? (Because the voice told me that mom would die, and the “voice” out of nowhere had to be related to something spiritual, since I did not make it come to my head–I’m sure that’s how I put that together). I struggled with counting things when walking or working out, and always having to pick out the exact “right feeling” cup our dress off the rack at the store, etc..and yes, I then suffered with the pulling out my hair in spots until I was bald in places–but that’s another whole story…) Finally one night while doing dishes I about had a nervous breakdown and I went in and talked to my Mom and told her what was going on. She told me something that healed me within the very moment I applied it for that time frame of my young life. My mind simply belived what she said. (It did later return in different ways, but I want to share this with you because I have wondered so much how much of this could be cured cognitively)–because for months after that, I was cured totally – to a point of running and jumping out in the yard and feeling free and happy that very afternoon. Here’s what the trick was. I simply believed her when she said (in her Baptist, simple way of viewing God,) “From now on, when those thoughts go through your head, just say, “Satan get thee behind me.”–quoting from the Bible),” And do you know what? They did. They simply vanished the first several times I did that. I had control. So it tells me when I knew it was okay to not let them have power…they went away. I don’t believe God magically answered that prayer and they went away. I believe my belief that I didn’t have to listen to them anymore made them go away. Has anyone else had experiences like this or can anyone bring more insight into this?
I have recently seen the Aviator and could not wait to read up on Howard Hughes and his version of OCD. I have lived with OCD for 20 years and have noticed developments in all types of treatments (CBT, Medication and Spiritual). I have also seen the public awareness of OCD grow through the media.
I think movies such as the Aviator increase public awareness about OCD. I also think the fact that Howard Hughes was such an intelligent and interesting man should inspire society to look at this illness through a new perspective. Ultimately everyone has some disorder in this complicated world, some more severe than others.
The important thing is to obtain help when needed and learn as much about your issues as possible. It is through education and counselling that I have begun to understand OCD better. I am not cured, I am on a journey and OCD is part of it. I understand how dibilitating OCD is and how much of my time it has wasted. I also know that when the OCD is not winning I can achieve many things that others cannot. Overall the aviator was difficult to watch, as the last thing an OC wants to see is others performing compulsions. Although it was inspiring to see Howard Hughes continue as far as he could without any treatment.
Modern society needs to understand that diversity is necessary in order to produce greatness. It is only when we detach from the limits of the known that we can be creative in the unknown.
HI, My name is Michelle and I also have mild ocd and not so mild bipolar. I also just watched the avaitor and was surpised to hear he had it as well, he played the part so well. It brougt tears to my eyes. The things I do are things just frustrating more than anything. Like another person mentioned, I have to check something a million times like turn off the stove, or coffee pot, or lock the door, I will do it and then go sit down and immediatly think did i go in there and shut it off, or did i just go in there, and end up repeating this 8 or nine times, sometimes more, I dont know what it is that makes me finally assure myself i did it. Even to where i will go and lay in bed at night and get up several times to check the coffee pot. I will be almost to the point off completly passing out and i have to get up one more time to check or i think i am going to be burned to death. Also sometimes when people are talking to me i have to write out what they are saying with my fingers, weather it be on the table, on my leg, steering wheel of the car. I dont think i do it all the time, but many times i catch myself doing it and I try hard to keep up with my invisable writing, but when i miss a few words i get really frustrated to the point i want to yell. another hand thing is I have to constantly be doing the sign language alfabet with my right hand…i dont know where that came from either. The same frustratration comes with food products. butter, peanut butter, ice cream, mayonase, anything in a container, it has to be completly smooth on the top, like if no one had used any. I thought of this during the ice cream scene in the aviator when katy yelled at him for not eating out of a bowl..lol.. I have to by me the small containers that way i can smooth it out on the top b4 putting it away and when i eat it i have to scoop it out in even layers, and i have to eat it with a small almost baby size spoon, if i cant find my spoon i dont eat it. It would bother me so bad i would buya ton of ice cream for my ex, just so he wouldnt touch mine. On purpose he would open up my small little pint and would take a huge scoop right from the center. That was my biggest episode with him over my ocd. I stood there looking at the ice cream with this huge gaping chunk out of the center, not sure if i was going to burst into tears, weather i wanted to cry because he was such a jerk, or because i was upset over the fact i was getting upset over a scoop of icecream gouged from my tub, I ended up screaming and throwing the ice cream at him for being suck and insensitive %*&^^% and there was this huge scene over it. I still think about that when i am doing my little ritual with my container products and that was 3 years ago. It still gives me such fury. If i dont fix it imeadatly, i toss it. I dont know when it all started, I still cant get over how intense the feelings are over something that in the “sane” part of my brain that thinks its something so trivial. Scarey thing is my bipolar is much worse. They never mentioned in the movie that he ocd, so at first i though maybe he was bipolar since i see things too sometimes but as the movie progressed it was plain to see he had ocd. Anyway, i am sorry to have rambled.
I dont even rember the question now… I am sorry.
Hey,
My sister was recently diagnosed with OCD and I feel aweful now about how I’ve been treating her. I really didn’t understand. But now I am beginning to since i have been doing alot of research for an informative speech on this topic for my college class. This site is providing me with lots of insight.
Thanks
ps. if you have anything that would help me understand ocd more just email me at TigerDash87@aol.com