Why? Because someone always comes along and makes a joke out of something that NEEDS to be made fun of. Member our conversation earlier this week about the too-hot-for-you marriage of Ayelet Waldman and Michael Chabon and her obnoxious “I have so much more sex than all the other mommies in my playgroup and because of that I am basically a better human being than all of them” essay in the New York Times? Well someone who was also obviously annoyed by Ayelet’s piece has written down what is a “day in the life of Ayelet”. You’ve got to read it.
One snippet to get the party started:
1:00 P.M. Drag the kids along to Toys in Babeland. The owners called last night to let me know that there’s a whole new section of stuff my husband can stick into me. I’m so excited. Eldest daughter somewhat disturbed when I explain the purpose of the double-headed dildo to her.
1:30 P.M. Compare prices on three-pronged rubber truncheon at Good Vibrations. It’s slightly more expensive than at Babeland, but they split the difference since I’m in so often. Youngest boy goes crazy with spray-on lube while I’m at the counter. So embarrassing I never thought I’d be one of those moms who has difficult children. Depression returns.
But oh, there’s so much more. Funny funny. Mean-funny, which is sometimes the best kind of humor.
I especially like this detail:
2:45 P.M. Begin writing column for Salon.
2:46 P.M. File column with Salon.
BWAHAHAHA
(via Book Slut)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
I knew you’d like that, Jayne! Isn’t that hilarious?
“Well, suck it, bitches.”
I know … hahahahaha
ok, i am snorting in my office and the president of the company walks by, looks at me and pauses….no doubt thinking, “i’m not paying you to have fun.” this is superb!
hahahaha! I love it. I wish I had thunk it up. That column by Waldman needed to be skewered, and here it has arrived!!
Skewered? That was more like thrust through a woodchipper…
“We were actually just going to take this and replace every instance of the word ‘husband’ with the word ‘penis,’ but it seemed a little juvenile.”
I think I might do that with the article just for fun.
Laughing too hard to work.
Oy. Wonderful.
Absolutely hilarious. Glad I’m not the only one who felt a bit grossed out by Ayelet’s oversharing. I was telling a male friend about her NYT article. He said, “Come on. Clearly, she’s got a good fantasy life. No one who needs to splash it around like that is really getting any!”
Check out
http://www.footballfansfortruth.us/archives/000891.html for a disgusted take on this.
That’s the Sound of the Joke Going Over My Head
I don’t entirely get satirizing Ayelet Waldman’s Modern Love column, neither this occasionally-funny-but-mostly-gross fauxpost — particularly odd considering that Waldman’s own blog never did anything of the sort