“Somebody needs to call him up and tell him he’s an asshole!” – Maria W. on Scott Hamilton
“I’m glad you’re back … even though I didn’t know you were gone.” – Ann
“M. and I were not really made for public viewing. We were a private exhibit. Invitation Only.” – Me
“Who the hell is Tex Watson?” – Barbara
“SLUGWORTH.” – Ann
“When she styled it, I looked like Sylvia Plath in her college years.” – Maria M.
“I need to get some new cuss words. I want to start using words like ‘asshole’ and ‘bitch.'” – Stephen
“…his snowbeard penis.” – Jackie
“Buhsh ‘n Pudding …” – Shelagh, trying to say “button pushing”
“So I want you to operate out of complete panic.” – Gene
“I’m on a roll! I’m on a very second-rate roll here!” – Sam
“It’s a great mistake to try to be original.” – Sam
“This is not a relaxing job.” – Sam
“So. You’ve just heard from the portobellos …” – Sam
“I had a bolt of stress that you didn’t know where he worked. Literally. I had a bolt of stress …. You know, for the coma contingency.” – Ann
“If I could say goodbye to you in a Rebus form I would …” – Me to Ann
“I wish there was such a thing as Open Boob Night.” – Brooke
“Where Alan Thicke meets Frankenstein …” – Ann
“And then Tim hugged me.” Long pause. “Well, electronically.” – Ann
“She puts marshmallows on brownies!” – Maria’s indictment of Jo
“She then plunged a dagger into my heart. Literally. She impaled me with her horns.” – Ann
“Honey Nut Clusters, steamed squash, and red wine …” – Jen, describing our nights at home
Kevin: “I just said ‘Fuck it’.”
Pause.
Robert: “Which is Latin for ‘Be Free!'”
Me: “What about Adam?”
Ann: “Oh please. That rumor has already been squelched.”
“And then, of course, there was the Bo Deans debacle …” – Me to Kate
“Once you get to my stage, you have no standards, and you just feel grateful to still be standing here!” – Sam
“It seems to me, Rodney, that the importance of the hyoid bone is in having one.” – Robert
Shelagh: “Isn’t it true that Meryl Streep used to throw up before she used to go onstage?”
Cheryl: “Yeah, but that’s because she was drunk.”
Shelagh: “Oh! Okay! Thanks for clearing that up for me!”
“I am so charmed by him that I can barely sleep.” – Mitchell on Scott Wolf
“What am I – the Profiler?” – Mere
“This is so Cohort One.” – Matt
Discussion about Kenneth Branagh’s Frankenstein:
Maria: “What annoyed me was that he called the movie ‘Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein’ when it clearly should have been called ‘My Chest.'”
Kevin: “I just said ‘Fuck it’.”
Pause.
Robert: “Which is Latin for ‘Be Free!'”
Hahahaha…that just made my day.
I honestly ran across reference to your site by Googling on “Double Jointed Hungarian Midgets”. A picture popped up and a link. The subtitle beneath the picture, “La Double vie de Veronique”; You’ld written: ” I felt NAMED by the film. I took it personally. This rarely happens. Doppelgangers … soulmates … kindred spirits … feeling alone – not just lonely – but existentially ALONE … feeling as though there might be a missing piece … and that that missing piece might be – someone I’ve never met yet. But someone I know intimately. Someone who … is me, only in the reverse. Or me in the past.”
That’s very moving. I’m no one to you. I was born in San Antonio, Texas. I’m 53 years old; summers from the age of 3 to 11 were spent in Mexico with my Irish mother, an amateur archeologist/historian and Grandmother, Helen. Each summer we drove from Houston to Mexico, touring Mexico City, the Yucatan, Guadlajara, Tampico, Vera Cruz, Merida, Acapulco, San Blas, Oaxaca, Morelia. My mother was a professional drinker and I grew up in bars, playing cards by myself as she and my Grandmother enjoyed themselves. We toured Europe the summer of third grade. We went by frieghter, Waterman Lines, from New Orleans, (where I spent time in the Carousel Bar in the Quarter) to Le Harve and then by train to Paris, Rome and Madrid. In 5th grade, my father was transferred to Tripoli, Libya. That was 1965. I attended the Oil Companies School through 9th grade, did 10th grade at Wheelus Air Force base in Tripoli and then we moved to Rome as the base was closed down by Ghadaffi. I attended and graduated from Nortre Dame International School in Rome, Via Aurelia 796. I was forced to return to the “States” in 1973. It’s been pretty much downhill since then.
I love your site; it’s inspiration to me. I’m not sure why I wrote my life history except to say that for some reason, reading your work brought back a flood of memories and images. Somehow, your writing has reminded me of a time when I thought I had something to say, something to contribute. It was a time in my life when I was inspired by the beauty and rich culture around me; about all that’s left is a vague interest in photography. My latest venture was photographing squalor in Houston. Houston is mostly squalor, thousands of acres of substandard, 1940’s housing slowly rotting in the steaming, fetid heat that passes for climate 9 months of the year. Houston reminds me of a boil in the ass crack of humanity. Only Pasadena is worse, it’s an oozing leprous sore.
Ah well, so glad I found your site. FYI, my favorite movie is the Cinicinnati Kid. Check it out sometime.
Ed:
//Somehow, your writing has reminded me of a time when I thought I had something to say, something to contribute. //
God, what a nice compliment. I don’t really know what to say – but thank you. Thanks for reading, and thanks for sharing that. Means a lot.
Also, uhm … “Double Jointed Hungarian Midgets”??? hahaha I love that I somehow would come up on a Google search for that. Random.
Dave E – I know, man. Just so funny!
“….you mean…Xe-NU.”
One of the funniest moments ever. How long did we laugh?? 25 minutes? It NEVER ENDED!!!!
I miss you!