I Am a Whirligig

So much going on, so much to comment on. My own personal life has flowered up into importance: vacation, and moving to a new apartment (which went quite well)

Meanwhile:

Well, I don’t even know where to begin. The headlines are – terrible. The world is in flames. But we got Chemical Ali. This is good. My radio wakes me up in the morning and to hear the headlines rattled off like that, in between consciousness and unconsciousness, gives off the impression that it is the end of civilization. “Explosion” “20 dead” “13 dead” “human remains” – It’s lunacy. I have nothing else to add to the commentary at the moment.

But for now, I am easing my way back into blogging – a rather difficult prospect, I am finding, after so long a break. I was completely out of communication on the Cape, and I absolutely loved it. I had my cell phone on me, but no one called me, and that was heaven. To be left ALONE.

So now. To communicate again.

Here is a bullet-pointed version of my time on the Cape with my family:

— pretty much wearing my bikini and flip-flops 24/7

— strolling down to the beach 4 or 5 times a day

— reading Pride and Prejudice for the first time – fantastic

— taking showers in the outdoor shower – is there a better sensation??

— playing Taboo with my siblings on the porch late-night (much laughter)

— reading Harriet the Spy to Cashel, my dear nephew, my dear platinum-headed nephew, light of my life

— watching the blackout on TV, having discussions about the power grid with Cashel who kept asking penetrating questions (“But Auntie Sheila, how do they KNOW that it wasn’t bad guys who made the lights go out?”)

— becoming absolutely OBSESSED with the jigsaw puzzle we brought up to the beach house … I’m not normally a puzzle girl, but I kind of lost my mind about it. I actually dreamt about the damn puzzle one night.

— going for a moonlight swim on our first night up there – an almost-full moon – you could read by the light of it — swimming in the silver moon-path, the dark ocean all around, the sky crowded with stars. So beautiful that none of us could speak.

— burgers on the grill, iced coffee

— Cashel’s transformation in terms of going swimming – he is now, officially, a water-baby. So fun to go swimming with him. His laughter is my favorite sound on the planet

— the biggest choices were: “Hmm. Should I go down to the beach for a second time this morning? Or should I stay at the house and work on the puzzle? Or do I want to drive into town and get ice coffees for everybody, and 3 newspapers so that everybody can work on crossword puzzles?” You know. Those kind of days.

Beautiful.

And then my beautiful mother (happy birthday, Mum!) drove down with me to support me emotionally through my move. She made the experience so much nicer!

I am now living on the cliffs in Weehawken … surrounded by the controlled chaos of all my boxes … but it certainly is coming along.

I look around at all my things, at my bed, my ceiling fan, the trees out the window, my desk, my Oriental rug … and get this overwhelming feeling of well-being. And peace. If you know me at all, then you will know how rare this is. I am, in general, a restless rather edgy being … prone to melancholia, and 3 a.m. epiphanies (hate those epiphanies – they add up to nothing – and are borne out of panic).

But the walls in my new place are good walls. It is a friendly place. A welcoming space. (Right, Mum?)

I will be happy there.

And what a beautiful gift, too, to walk out my front door, look to my right, off the cliff, and see the span of Manhattan, all in one glimpse. It is rare to get perspective like that in Manhattan, among the concrete canyons … Coming home to that kind of perspective will be good for me.

I don’t have a TV yet, or internet hook-up at home … Hence, my silence at the computer.

All should be worked out by next week. This is my goal.