In honor of World Poetry Day, I give to you my favorite poem: “The More Loving One”, by Auden. More thoughts on this poem are in the extended entry – you can just click on that.
I know my poem by heart, almost like a prayer.
The More Loving One
Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.
How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.
Admirer as I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.
Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.
More thoughts below … My relationship to this poem continues to grow, morph, transform. It’s really quite extraordinary.
I’ve written about this poem extensively on my blog, in various contexts.
The doppelganger and I talked about this poem on the night we met (too lazy to find links. Whatever. It was in the middle of the dreaded recount) We were talking about our love for Auden, in general. I got so excited talking about Auden that I stepped into the street without looking and almost got run over. Doppelganger said, “Lines 7 and 8 are certainly words to try to live by, anyway.” We were walking through Soho, and it was 2 am, and he remembered the line numbers. You know, it was one of those cool moments. Heart-crackingly cool. Later, when things did not work out with doppelganger-man – I found myself in the position of needing to LIVE “lines 7 and 8”, in terms of my dealings with him. And so lines 7 and 8 became a mantra: “If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me. If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me…” Over and over. Strangely enough, the mantra worked. Sort of. Love is a ragged business.
Nevertheless, I agree with doppelganger: Lines 7 and 8 are words to try to live by, anyway.
Poetry Day
Red says it’s World Poetry Day. So I’ll join the fun and link to a couple of poems I love. There are so many poets I adore: Billy Collins, Sharon Olds, Marge Piercy. Reading poetry is a form of food…
World Poetry Day
…is apparently today.
Sheila talks about her favorite poem, “The More Loving One” by W.H. Auden. Blind Cave Fish has been putting up samples of her teen angst poetry for several weeks now.
In fact, it was Sheila’s poetry discussion that firs…
I’m afraid my experiences as “the more loving one” have ended so desolately that it’s hard to agree with Auden, but I do. I surely understand the point of view and agree that the yearning and hope mixed with love and desire, which seems to me is the formula for the “the more loving one,” is, however short in duration, sublime. Heavy sigh.
i think Auden is the only dead gay poet i haven’t played on stage…the time has come!
Poetry!
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