So I admitted my EGREGIOUS mistake in blowing off Patrick Dempsey for 20 years. I’m still in shock at my own moronic lack of judgment.
And now I must admit how unbeLIEVABLY wrong I was … again … in thinking Kathy Griffin was annoying. I was so MEAN to her when she did the red carpet thing at the Oscars, 2005. She was fired from that job, by the way. As was Star Jones. (My opinion of Star Jones’ awfulness remains intact.) But now Kathy Griffin has basically taken over the Bravo channel – and I cannot get enough of her. I love her. I love her SO MUCH. Again: what was my problem???
Alex tried to explain to me why I was wrong. She did so gently, and with tremendous patience. (Uhm. Not.)
For whatever reason, Griffin rubbed me the wrong way. And now I am literally a HUGE fan.
Her observations, her fearlessness … Can’t get enough.
There’s a moment in one of her stand-up routines when she talks about how nervous it makes her to be around white people who NEED to pretend they are black. She says she doesn’t know where to look, or … all she wants to do is glance at a nearby African American and check in with THEM to see if it’s okay … All of this came about because she was in Eminem’s Slim Shady video – and she said Eminem’s entire entourage is black, but Eminem was the blackest-acting person there. “Eminem is so black – now that is a black man. But Justin Timberlake … Justin Timberlake is practically Nubian right now.”
Favorite stories of hers:
— Her imitation of Gwyneth Paltrow on David Letterman (and everywhere else, actually) – amazing imitation – how does one imitate Gwyneth?? Watch Kathy Griffin – it’s spot on.
— The moment backstage with Celine Dion, where Kathy Griffin was so nervous she realized at one point that she was petting Celine Dion’s long hair
— The humorlessness of the Destiny’s Child girls – hahahahahaha
— “Justin Timberlake is practically Nubian right now.” Nubian?? sooooo funny
— Getting a call that Steven Spielberg was “personally upset” with her and her response (“He’s personally upset with me? So … that means I won’t be starring in any more Spielberg movies?? Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck you!”)
— The whole story of Barbra Streisand on Oprah (I wish I had seen that interview!) – and then Kathy Griffin’s moment with Oprah a couple months later – GENIUS!!!
— Her saying, “I’m so far to the left that I’m basically a Sandinista.” hahahahahahahahahahaha
— Her stories of going to Afghanistan and basically losing it – going right up to a group of local men and saying, “Hi! LOOK AT ME. LOOK AT MY FACE. YUP. HERE IS MY WHORE-FACE. PLAIN AND CLEAR. I’M AN AMERICAN WOMAN! LOOK AT MY FACE.” Forcing them to shake hands with her, even though they didn’t want to. “THIS IS HOW WE DO IT IN AMERICA. SHAKE MY HAND, YOU FUCKER.” And some kindly Marine basically dragging her away ….
— She’s done a couple USO tours – awesome stories all along the way … Standing on the platform in the middle of the desert, with a huge audience, saying, “Can’t we have our next war in, oh, St. Lucia or something??”
— Her whole obsession with Clay Aiken – and seeing him backstage at his show in Vegas. HYSTERICAL. Her observations about him … I mean, she loves him … but he gets NO slack from her!!
— Saying to the audience, “You guys are actually nervous that I’m making fun of Oprah right now.”
The woman is a breath of fresh air.
I was wrong, wrong, wrong.
(What’s next? I’m going to suddenly realize that Jewel has been an awesome singer/songwriter all along? I’m going to suddenly develop a deep appreciation for Mischa Barton’s phenomenal acting? What next??)
But in this case, it’s a PLEASURE to be proven wrong – because Kathy Griffin is just a JOY.
did u see her rip Anne Coulter a new one just moments after Anne Coulter spewed her nasty bile on the Today Show…Kathy was on later that morning and just went after her…awesome.
I didn’t! Shit – sorry I missed it.
I just think she’s awesome – she seems so REAL to me.
Also she called Justin Timberlake “Nubian” and I just can’t get over the funniness of that.
I just love how she doesn’t give a damn. Her imitation of Gwyneth is so hostile and so right ON!!
love love love kathy griffin. her stand up routines are hilarious. it’s full of those moments when you say to yourself…”oh, no i should not be laughing at this,” but it is physically impossible not to. She would have been someone who got me in big trouble in high school.
i like her too…her parents are very funny too..her whole Celine story killed me.
mitchell,
Did you see how Anne Coulter COULD NOT STOP playing with her hair?????????? I had to change the channel.
How about when she finally just admitted to Celine: “Oh my God. I am petting your hair like a crazy person!” and Celine barked!!!
hahahaha I LOVE THAT.
And yeah, her parents are hysterical – with their boxes of wine.
There was this one moment at the Oscars (at least I think it was the Oscars. One of those red carpet things) that I thought was brilliant. She was interviewing someone famous (forget who) and said “Why aren’t you wearing any ribbons?!?!? Don’t you CARE ABOUT ANYTHING?” It was hilarious.
Jewel? Naah, it’ll be, “Please TRY, CHiPs! In fact, try harder!” ;-)
Emily – HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I know – somehow I just missed the humor – I don’t know what my problem was.
That was one of the reasons she got fired – she started a rumor ON THE RED CARPET that Dakota Fanning had gone into rehab and then asked celebs if they wanted to give Dakota a “message of hope”. I mean, obviously it wasn’t true – and a ton of people got the joke, etc etc – and the next day she got fired.
Uhm – what was Star Jones’ excuse for getting fired?? Just that she sucked! I stand by my assessment of Star Jones’ awfulness.
Nobody seems to handle any type of deprecating humor at the Oscars. It’s amazing. Here’s a room full of entertainers, some of whom have built entire careers on making other people laugh, who can’t even take a moment to laugh at themselves. It’s like, what? Did I just make a rude joke about Jesus with the Pope in the room?
Like Jon Stewart busting on Co$. All those nervous little tittering laughs … “omigod, did he just say that?????”
Uhm, yes. He did.
Oh, and her bits on Tom Crooze are so much fun. hahahaha After the whole Dakota Fanning thing – was when she got the call that Steven Spielberg was “personally upset” with her – and she was like: “Uhm, your star is going NUTS on talk shows left and right and he thinks he has aliens in his bloodstream – you have bigger problems than me busting on Dakota Fanning!!!”
No kidding. Not to mention the ego it takes to send a message to someone that you are “personally upset” with them. Um, as opposed to impersonally upset? “I’m not upset with you personally, but Dakota Fanning’s dad wants to kick your ass.”
Whatever, Steven. She’s a COMEDIAN. She tells things called JOKES. You know, those things that occassionally turn up in your movies, sometimes unintentionally?
…now i hate to gossip..you know this about me…but Anne Coulter’s bizarre behavior,her manic hair manipulations and her Nicole/Lindsay-like thin-ness seem to point to a little trouble with the nose-candy!!??? Wouldnt that be awesome????!!! You mark my words Susanna..its coming…like Sheila says..the shrillest, loudest bigots will come crashing down..hard!…also..is it me?..or does she have an Adam’s apple???? hmmmmm?
I also just love how Griffin talks about her friends “the gays”.
“So the gays and I went to Vegas …”
“I call up my gays and off we go …”
I look forward to watching that cunt snap, because yup – it’s coming, I want a front row seat.
Oops, there go some of my readers.
Good riddance.
However I did not see her “manic hair manipulations” – but she always struck me as rather manic. You know, like a whinnying horse discovering there’s a fire in the barn.
the Dakota Fanning bit was hilarious..BECAUSE its soo ludicrous..any intellegent person got it!!..it remeinds me of when Sarah Silverman got in trouble with some dude form the Asian anti-defamation league/society…she made an OBVIOUS joke about racism on Conan O’Brien and was taken to task..big time!! NBC issued an apology thru Conan(a low point for him as a company man)…sometime humor is mean…and i can be pretty sensitive about certain issues(against my better judgement)…but my rule is..IS IT FUNNY? ..if yes…then hooray…usually when something is simply hateful and bigoted..its NOT funny! Kathy Griffin getting fake support for Dakota Fanning on the red carpet is a brilliant Hollywood in-joke/spoof!
“watching that cunt snap”……..HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!….
its like a little poem!!
Oh – and E asked her to give some kind of apologetic statement. Griffin said, “You’d have to be a fucking idiot to not know I was kidding.” The E representative was like: “What???” Griffin said, “That’s it. That’s my statement.”
Good for her – and now she literally has taken over the Bravo channel.
Speaking of Spielberg – what the hell happened between him and Crooze? Dammit, there is so much in that situation that I want to KNOW – and sadly, I never will. I don’t have access. And I can’t imagine any of them will ever talk.
But it bums me out, because I am SO curious!
Yes, Coulter’s a jagoff, she’s as thin as a rail, and she’s about to set saaaiiilll!
Cunt snap! Baby, cunt snap!
I rarely use that word. For Coulter I make an exception. Obviously!
I generally hate it, but “cunt snap” is kind of evocative.
“Evocative” is one way to put it, yes… “Sheila spends five hours a day deleting spam” is another. =) Funny song, though!
Sheila, hold the line on Jewel! Whatever else happens, hold that line!
I KNOW!!!!! I POSTED THE SAME THING ON MY BLOG A FEW WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!
God I’m so feckin’ excited to find a fellow Kathy Griffen fan. She’s changed! She’s a joy!
Shit – how did I miss that post, RTG?? Did I comment on it?
I’ve seen the same special of hers 3 times now (where she gets locked out of her hotel room in Palm Springs chasing after her dogs, and she has no pants on, and the lesbians watch her dogs while she goes to get another key, etc. etc.) – and it’s funny each time I see it!!
Also – her irreverence towards the whole pampered-celeb thing is just so refreshing. I think after this year of celebs running out of control (uhm – couch-jumping?? drunkie-Lohan?) – her perspective is something people really want to hear!
Oh I know! I haven’t seen the Gwyneth impression though – I need to see that.
I died laughing when she talked about petting Celin Dion’s hair.
I found my own comments on the comedienne: http://rightthinkinggirl.com/2006/05/14/kathy-griffin-redeemed/
And how Celine actually barked?? In response to the hair-petting? How genius is that??? So unexpected.
“I be dog for you!”
God – just hysterical.
What’s next? I’m going to suddenly realize that Jewel has been an awesome singer/songwriter all along?
That, of course, will be the last day I read this blog. I do have some standards, you know.
Mark – I totally understand. I could not expect you to follow me into snaggle-toothed love. I would miss you, but I understand.
YES! I watched her “D-List” show last night, marveling at how funny she is ALL THE TIME. I was going to write a post about it today and about how much I love her right now.
Jen – how bout when she was talking about going to visit that woman who had arthritis who had written to her …
and just the way she said: “I love to do charity ….. on television …”
I can see “Steven Spielberg is personally upset with you” becoming a catch-phrase of mythic proportions. ;-)
The Hollywood folks seem to be striving to take self-importance to new, previously unexplored heights. As a limited but effective antidote, I think Cathy Griffin and Jon Stewart should be hired permanently for the Oscars…
I’m late to the party, but Kathy Griffin freaking rocks. Her “official statement” to E–“You’d have to be a fucking idiot to not know I was kidding.”–that’s hilarious.
Okay, now I’m about to say something that is going to completely ruin my credibility in your book…I’m almost afraid to say it…but when you asked who the next person might be who you currently despise but who you’ll realize you’ve been wrong about all of these years…the first person I thought of…I almost don’t want to type her name for fear that you’ll ban me from commenting, or just mock me derisively for the rest of eternity…and before I say her name, I want to say that sometimes I agree with you and think she’s godawful…but sometimes I really love her too…and, well, okay, I’ll just say it:
What’s next?
Renee Zellweger.
breathe, sheila …. breathe deeply … everything’s going to be okay … breathe …
Renee Zellweger AND Princess Michael of Kent. ;-)
Oh, and I absolutely ADORE Kathy Griffin. Erik said it already: she freaking rocks.
Dave J – hahahahahahahaha Princess Michael!! Oh, how we hate that frigid bitch! I love that you hate her, too. It’s so bizarre – nobody else outside of England really even knows who she is. But I have loathed her for years.
peppermint patty AND ann coulter?
Go figure, sheila…
I was working all weekend with the TV on and caught Kathy G.’s bravo blitzkrieg as well. I had the EXACT SAME resistance to her, and found myself also completely turned around about her. It’s impossible not to like someone so fearlessly self-depracating. I even had to rethink celine dion to boot.
I owe you a lengthy correspondance as soon as I come up for air!
hahahahaha bill!!!! peppermint patty – hahahahahahaha
I just thought about you today! But I figured it wouldn’t be cool to stalk you. I hope you are doing so well!
you’re NEVER a stalker, sheila! I’m the guilty poor correspondant! I will endeavor to fix that.
Ohhh I definitely have a stalking gene. :) I’ve tried to keep it under control since I was, oh, 15.
No, but seriously – nice to hear from you and i am glad to hear that you realized resistance was futile with Kathy Griffin as well.
I loved when she said, in this really dramatic tone, “How much fun … is the Tom Cruise meltdown?? It is SO DELIGHTFUL.”
dammit. now i really wish i had bravo! i loved kathy griffin when she was on seinfeld a few times but i never got a chance to see her anywhere else. damn.
I was out fishing with the kids yesterday so I missed this post.
I got to meet Kathy Griffing during one of her trips to Afghanistan. I’d liked her from her Suddenly Susan days and being PAO, I got to speak with her a little more candidly than some of the other troops.
Very neat person and she definitely always tells it like it is.
Sorry, bad with catching up on the comments…but yeah, when she went to the lady’s house? That was cool. I also thought the part where she got the key to the city of Louisville was hilarious. You could totally tell that the rest of them were sort of embarrassed for her too, but she just rolled with it. I can’t wait for next week’s show!
Kathy Griffin looks like a transvestite.
So FUGLY!
kittykatt:
Thanks so much for that really well-written perspective!