Walking to the bus this morning through the gleaming air. Scuffing through the fallen leaves. Wearing a sweater and a skirt … a lovely fall morning.
Oops, there’s my bus! Let me run the 5 steps to get to it!
I only got two steps before disaster struck, and I fell. Let me make it clear: I fell on NOTHING. I fell on a crack in the atmosphere. I didn’t just trip. I WIPED OUT. I basically flew through the air. (I finally “flew up”!!) My bag went flying and its contents: my gym clothes, my sneakers, my script, my keys, my makeup … spilled out into the street. But mainly – I went flying. I flew through the air towards the bus. Worse: I made a horrible yowling scream, mid-air. Then, in full view of an entire road full of traffic, other people waiting for the bus, and the people ON the bus … I landed on the street, in a hodge podge of arms and legs … my belongings now scattered nearly to Secaucus …
Of course I tried to break my fall with the palms of my hands so I now have full-on stigmata.
My hosiery is now torn and bloodied, and my knees look too awful to mention.
I’m just glad I didn’t land on my feckin’ FACE. Good God. Just thinking about it makes me shiver.
Happy birthday, Meredith!
Sheila – I can’t think of a more perfect gift for Mere! How thoughtful of you!!! She will love it!
(as I do – sitting here at my desk trying NOT to picture this scene ANY MORE because I will laugh again.)
It was the scream I made as I went flying towards the bus that truly makes me cringe now.
I can deal with the stigmata. But the memory of that scream? Horrible.
Oopsie Daisy! Sheila go boom! Hope you’re all better soon, honey!
Have a nice trip! See ya next fall!
(Sorry. Couldn’t resist. I’ve done that before, too, just tripped on air.)
Lisa – hahahaha
DOWN she goes.
It was so SUDDEN. I had no recourse but to scream like a wild animal and fly through the air towards the turnpike.
What a great present Sheila!
I just snorted outloud at work.
Then I read it again and snorted again.
I can actually visualize it! I just wish I could have heard the “yowling scream”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHareyouokayHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mere-I wonder if her flesh makes that slapping noise against the pavement like that baby at Warwick Mall????
“OWWWBBBIEEE!!” as my niece Piper always says.
How about some bacon strip bandages from Archie McPhee.com? (I don’t know why I like them so much.)
But you can put them on your poor hose.
And your knees, too, I suppose. ;-)
Hope you’re okay!