The Wachovia ads are everywhere now – and actually, I find them very moving… with a friendly-looking banker walking to another bank in the rain in order to get the passport from the vault … on time for the student to make his flight … the banker who gives his client his home phone number so that on a Sunday the banker can help the delivery guy solve his problem in order that supplies will get to Katrina victims on time … The personal touch!
Wachovia. They really watch ovah yah, know what I mean?
But then the voiceover says:
“At Wachovia, we are absolutely obsessed with customer satisfaction.”
Woah. Back OFF, Wachovia. Get a LIFE.
It sounds a little desperate and stalker-ish to me. Also, it’s not JUST “obsessed” – which is bad enough when you’re talking about your BANK. It’s “absolutely obsessed” – which adds on to the creep factor. In general, if someone uses adverbs all the time, they are not to be trusted. (Ahem. Tom Croooze. He is KING of adverbs. Nothing is ever “great”, or “wonderful” or “incredible”. It’s “absolutely great.” “How is Kate?” “Absolutely wonderful. Absolutely great. She is magnificent. Absolutely magnificent.” My e-meter is goin’ off the charts now, Tom, just so you know. I think you need a sec check PRONTO. Cut out those adverbs and I might buy your line of bull malarkey.)
Excessive use of adverbs = empty-souled emotional black hole.
So back to Wachovia. I think COMMITMENT is a far better word for a bank to use than “absolutely obsessed”.
I mean, hell, I’d love it if my banker would walk down the street to another vault on a Sunday in order to get my passport out of hock – making his way over the sidewalks underneath his umbrella, smiling a private smile at the good work that he does … I would love it if I had my banker’s home phone number … but I don’t want ANYONE to be “absolutely obsessed” with me. Just back OFF, Wachovia. How ’bout you be COMMITTED to my satisfaction not OBSESSED with it, mkay?
Every time I hear it (and the ads appear to be on all the damn time now) I kind of laugh. It’s so EMOTIONAL. Even though the voiceover voice is measured and calm, there is a sonic-boom SCREAM of desperation beneath the calm … like a wasted girl at a frat party who believes the guy she’s doing jello shots with is her soulmate – the sloshy tears, the recriminations after only 10 minutes of knowing each other … the creepy Fatal Attraction potential … “Absolutely obsessed” is actually TOO invested in someone’s satisfaction.
There’s a fine line between “absolutely obsessed” and a bunny boiling on the stove.
“At Wachovia, we are so absolutely obsessed with customer satisfaction that we might end up boiling a bunny on your stove.”
Hilarious.
hahahaha I know, right?? I want a bank to be committed to me, not batshit crazy about me.
I guess I have become overly cynical (which comes from living in a town where you cannot find a furnace repairman or plumber on a weekend – as if drains never decide to stop draining on a Saturday), but when I see the ad about the passport, my response is:
“Shyeah, like THAT would actually happen.”
seriously. In my world, not only would I not have my banker’s home phone number, but if I did and called her, she’d be all “Why are you calling me at home? Passport? Can’t go abroad? Well, damn, I guess you’ve got a problem then. (Click)”
The only place-of-business I ever had obsessed about me was A T & T, and that was only after I decided to drop their long-distance service for something cheaper. They called me up every week begging me to take them back (seriously? I have had break-ups that were easier than dealing with A T & T). Finally, after one of the callers got a little abusive (called me an “idiot” for going with the other guys), I had to write a letter to the highest-up I could find and tell him that I would NEVER use A T & T again if they were the last phone company on earth.
and guess what happened this year? My phone company, my beloved SBC, with whom I NEVER had problems, bought up what remains of A T & T and now is going by their name.
I actually considered getting rid of my “landline” phone, simply because of my bad memories of A T & T. (SBC/ATT is the only option in the town where I live, other than for cellular service).
I’m sure somewhere in the bowels of A T & T, one of the apprentice demons is laughing because I was FORCED to come back to them.
ricki – get a cable modem and go with Vonage for your land line.
except, John, my understanding of the way the local business agreement works, I’d be getting my cable modem THROUGH AT&T SBC…
you can’t win sometimes when you live in a small town.
Oh ricki – yuck!!!
I also had a horrible experience with AT&T. Although I don’t think they were obsessed with me. They just were incompetent and unhelpful.
ricki,
You must live in the same area of the country as I do. I have AT&T/SBC. When I tell people I have dial-up at my home, they are appalled, but I can’t get broadband or cable or whatever for internet access. You can in LITTLE ROCK — a scant 18 miles away — but not in my town.
My AT&T story:
About 3 years back, during the period when every long distance company wanted you to switch to their service, I got a call from Bell South. These calls were the one telemarketing calls I would take ‘cus they’d switch you for free and usually give you something in addition.
So they asked me how much I was paying in long distance and I replied 80-100 bucks a month (don’t ask… it’s still a sore subject between my wife and me on her telephone habits.). They said that they could give me a “flat rate” of 49 dollars a month… So obviously I jumped on it. AT&T calls me the next hour and asks me why I’m switching. I explain the deal and how much money a month I’d be saving.
They: “Well, we have the exact same deal here at AT&T, so there’s really no reason to go through the ‘hassle’ of switching.”
Me: “So you been ripping me off for months now and you only tell me about the ‘deal’ once I decide to jump ship?!”
They: “Um… yes”
Me: (Click)
Many businesses fail to grasp that there needs to be at least *some* connection between the image you portray in your ads, and the reality of the customer experience. Wachovia had better ensure that its employees *will* do things like walk to another branch in the rain, or this campaign will only backfire.
A couple of years ago, I was in a store where I received absolutely awful service. The store manager was being unhelpful, and I pointed out to her that, right behind her, was a big poster about “values” and “customer committment” and such. She didn’t appear to see any connection.
As it happened, I had met the CEO of the chain a couple of weeks before–nice guy–and thought about dropping him an email, but decided to let it ride.
David F – See I got no beef with “customer commitment”. Good on ya! But what if there was a sign on the wall that said: “We are absolutely OBSESSED with your emotional well-being.”
Unless it’s a yoga studio or a spa – then I kinda don’t want to see that sign.
Also Wachovia may be a very good bank for all I know. I have no idea – they’re not my bank. I just found the ads themselves to be amusing. Absolutely OBSESSED??? Chill OUT, bank!!
“Back OFF, Wachovia.”
You just told a bank to get a life. Hahahaha.
“Don’t even TRY, Wachovia!”
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Obsessed…maybe for an airline. If the obsession is with safety.
No – not even with airline safety. The word “obsessed” sounds unstable and that is the last thing I want an airline to be. I want them to BE obsessed but I do not want them to SAY it because it sounds too emotional and like a wasted psycho frat girl. Be COMMITTED to my safety – and as a bank be COMMITTED to giving me good service – but keep your obsession to yourself. You’re a business, don’t get all EMOTIONAL.
Get a LIFE, Wachovia!
Why do I feel like if the ad had said that Wachovia is obsessed about the Red Sox, you’d be on line in a branch office somewhere with a new account form in your hand? :-)
Reminds me of this fake SNL commercial.
I keep picturing William Shatner saying, “Get a LIFE, will you Wachovia?”
Laughing Out Loud (screw lol)! Sheila that should be somebody’s stand up material right there. Do you know any standups? Like that guy you did your show with. Send it to him. Really funny stuff!
“We here at Wachovia are obsessed with your customer satisfaction. Are you happy with our service? Do you love being here? What were you doing looking at that other bank? I know you still think about Wells Fargo, don’t try and deny it. The interest rates I give you, and this is the thanks I get? Stop looking at that ATM machine like that. You are my customer! Forever, and ever, and ever…”
dorkafork -bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Woah. Back OFF, Wachovia. Get a LIFE.
Chill OUT, bank!!
Were I drinking milk, it would have exited through my nose.
You’re too funny, Red!
Wachovia, watch ovah yah! OMG too funny!
Maybe they should change their name to Obsessovai or Stalkovia
Red,
Bet you didn’t know that the bunny boiling episode was Roger Rabbit’s screen debut!