Charmin Has Left the Building

I know it will be hard to believe, but a certain venue in Times Square has closed its doors. I had gone out searching for it again only to find … it was gone.

I took 2 pretty damn funny pictures of what is there now. I’ve listed them below.

So here is the monolith that now confronts you … if you go seeking out that old venue.

Wow. Okay. I GOT it. You guys CLOSED and there is now a RETAIL OPPORTUNITY.

Blue curtains line the glass front doors, obscuring what is within … I wondered what remained of the mania I had once experienced. I went to peek between a gap in the blue curtains to see if there were any remnants of the former tenant …. And I took a photo thru the glass door of what I saw on the wall behind that curtain.

This may be the funniest photo I have ever taken.

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25 Responses to Charmin Has Left the Building

  1. ilyka says:

    Why, WHY am I actually almost sad about this? I must be insane. And yet I can’t help kicking myself for having missed it.

    RIP, crazy Charmin toiletapalooza!

  2. steve on the mountain says:

    Was it really ever there, or were you perhaps caught in … The Twilight Zone?

  3. Nightfly says:

    I wonder. Did all the patrons line up and clap like demented idiots as the employees left on the final day? “YAY! You’ve been fired! You can find real jobs! We’re SOOOO HAPPY for you!”

  4. Emily says:

    No.

    NO.

    It’s like looking at ruins of the Acropolis.

    How can the human race let such a work of beauty and wonder devolve to such ruin?

  5. red says:

    I am so glad that I went in there (in every sense of the word) while I had the chance.

  6. RTG says:

    Emily,

    You have cracked me up! :)

  7. ricki says:

    sic transit gloria mundi.

    Or something like that.

    What they need to do is load some of those restrooms up on specially designed trailers and take them on tour around the country…I could suggest a few towns around where I live that boast of being “shopper’s paradises” but then ALL of the stores have little signs in the window warning there are no public restrooms.

    Who knows? They might even develop a cult following – TPheads – who cross the country with them, selling grilled-cheese sandwiches and love-beads in order to pay for the biodiesel to run their modified VW bus….

  8. Tommy says:

    You know, I was contemplating a New York trip later this year. I dunno, now. Somehow, it’s like the whole city would be empty…

  9. red says:

    Now I won’t be able to pretend I am a desert nomad from Turkmenistan so I can “represent” that country on their World Poop-o-Meter map. I had so many plans!!!

    Thank God I went there once and took those photos. It is now a glimpse of days gone by … an era long-dead.

  10. Mark says:

    Man, that didn’t last long, did it? I guess that answers the question of how the heck did they make money on that.

  11. Maarti says:

    Darling, they took that sucker down right after New Years. Before I got to “go!” Major bummer, to be sure.

  12. red says:

    Mark – hahahaha I know! Like – and they’re making money how? 2 bucks a poop? I mean pop?

  13. Carrie says:

    All that money they just pissed away right down the crapper.

  14. Carrie says:

    Fitting, innit?

  15. red says:

    Carrie – hahahahahaha You’re the one who showed me the Flush o Meter thing which started my mind a-spinnin’ … God, that was so hysterical.

  16. Carrie says:

    Now we just have to find that map and hunt up all those other palaces of Charmin delight. Oh, wait, that was the only one, wasn’t it? No Charmin Delight Tower in North Korea, just one lonely North Korean who escaped into New York and was able to relieve himself in surroundings beyond his wildest imaginings, probably totally confirming all the boogey-stories he was brought up on about the evils of capitalism…

  17. Carrie says:

    Can you imaging having your head filled with all sorts of uber communist anti-American rhetoric, that being your total diet, and then for some reason ending up in New York and going to the Charmin Crapper? I mean, wow, what a validation, with high fives on top!

  18. red says:

    hahahaha “one lonely North Korean” …

    I mean, I honestly gave thought to how I would impersonate someone from Sierra Leone in order to get them on the Charmin Map.

  19. Carrie says:

    Well dammit, I guess you better get on the stick about your Hoop Skirt Day!

    *Life’s ambition thwarted: Make the Charmin Map

  20. red says:

    I know – I really wanted to go up those gleaming escalators in my hoop skirt – and have someone with a camera stand at the top, taking photos of my ascent. I think that would be HILARIOUS – I can just see the picture in my mind.

    I am so glad I decided to go to that Charmin joint that one day … Imagine if I hadn’t! The comedy that I would have missed out on!

  21. Carrie says:

    I for one am thankful you did make the Charmin journey. Just knowing such a thing came to being – well, it makes me all warm inside.

    By the way, click my link, have you seen it yet??

  22. red says:

    I did – it’s truly disturbing. Did we somehow come across that the last time we were joking around the Pooper? it looks vaguely (and disturbingly) familiar.

  23. Carrie says:

    Yes, it is totally out of the Pooper school of insanity.

  24. miker says:

    It was immensely comforting to think that there was at least a slight chance I might one day visit the mecca of poop. Now, it’s gone forever. How heartlessly cruel the barons of capitalism can be…

  25. red says:

    Mike – hahahaha

    And now … once again, the tourists’ search for public bathrooms in Times Square will continue!

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